I seriously considered calling in sick today. I even had my sick voice all prepared, and was about to make the call when I realized...
I...I don't have a job.
And then I realized that I kind of Do have a job, and that it doesn't allow for sick days, and then I got overwhelmed and panicky and thought I could use a vacation...but I kinda just had one.
I really gotta get back into some kind of routine or this will just keep happening. It would probably help if I had anything to look forward to...and maybe that sounds really awful, because everything is really pretty good here, so what's the problem?
I think...well, I think the problem is Me. I feel like I'm staring down a very long stretch of very straight road, and it's...just...boring. And that's scary.
I've been here before.
But! I Am actually learning...I'm better at recognizing the signs now. Better equipped to prevent what usually follows this feeling. So...if I can just hold onto that, I dunno, maybe this doesn't have to be a train wreck.