I debated against posting this because it contains *gasp* something about alcohol but I'm 25 and responsible and okay and I thought it was funny.
Yesterday I bought a bottle of wine (pink Moscato, to be specific, because I'm not a huge wine person but I do like that) because I wanted to feel fancy. You know, having a glass of wine while chilling on the couch, etc.
Well, I've never actually bought a bottle before. I don't know how it works. So I'm standing at my island with my glass, and I pull the paper off, then I loosen the metal wire trap thing thinking the twist off lid was underneath it.
Nope.
Once the metal was loosened, there was a huge POPBANG and the cork flies out and I yelp and then there's wine bubbling over the top like it does in the movies and it's getting all over my hands and the counter and the floor so I'm yelling... Words.... As I run across the kitchen and set it in the sink, then I have to hurry and clean up the mess because the pets are sniffing at it and the last thing I need is a tipsy dog and buzzed cats.
I still don't know where the cork went so I stuffed a paper towel in the top and put the rest of the wine in the fridge after having a glass.
So here I was trying to be all sophisticated and of course it explodes (almost literally) and there's a paper towel in the top. If that's not the story of my life, I don't know what is.