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Ugly.......let me quote you: I have enough reasons to believe God has me going in this direction, but nothing is working or making sense.
Let's get one thing perfectly clear....The Bible tells us "GOD is NOT the author of confusion". Period...nothing else is needed to explain that. It is simple, it is direct and there is NO question that the Holy Spirit has anointed this verse to be part of our BIBLE. With that said.....anybody on earth that can read your posts in the last several weeks, sees "CONFUSION" all through them, all over them and all about them. There is NOTHING that you typed that comes across as anything else. I do not have the time to go through all of your comments to paste here to support the fact that CONFUSION is reigning in your life with this situation that you have chosen to expose to the internet. When total confusion is present, especially in her and your lives, guess what...two totally confused people added together does not equal Stability.
You told us that you two have problems that will NOT go away until death.....so apparently, there is never a chance of JESUS CHRIST healing anything there? You have ruled out that possibility just by declaring it. Why not start helping at a local soup kitchen, homeless shelter, or community aid station just to get refocused about this and see how the rest of the world deals with their catastrophic events. I did...and now I am a better person for it!
Let's get one thing perfectly clear....The Bible tells us "GOD is NOT the author of confusion". Period...nothing else is needed to explain that. It is simple, it is direct and there is NO question that the Holy Spirit has anointed this verse to be part of our BIBLE. With that said.....anybody on earth that can read your posts in the last several weeks, sees "CONFUSION" all through them, all over them and all about them. There is NOTHING that you typed that comes across as anything else. I do not have the time to go through all of your comments to paste here to support the fact that CONFUSION is reigning in your life with this situation that you have chosen to expose to the internet. When total confusion is present, especially in her and your lives, guess what...two totally confused people added together does not equal Stability.
You told us that you two have problems that will NOT go away until death.....so apparently, there is never a chance of JESUS CHRIST healing anything there? You have ruled out that possibility just by declaring it. Why not start helping at a local soup kitchen, homeless shelter, or community aid station just to get refocused about this and see how the rest of the world deals with their catastrophic events. I did...and now I am a better person for it!
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I dealt with going into crack town on Friday nights to witness to addicts, sellers and prostitutes when i was 14, where i could've been shot just for being white. And sometimes we fed the homeless since the church it was based out of was IN crack town. So i've seen the homeless, the addicted.
I dealt with watching my mom slowly die for 12 years, until i was 21.
I dealt with the sense of failure i felt knowing the last thoughts my mom must've had about me is what a failure of a son i was.
I dealt with suicidal thoughts.
I dealt with sleeping with a large knife under my pillow, just because it was comforting.
I dealt with anger and bitterness.
I dealt with my fiance turning her back on me and refusing to come to my mothers funeral with me, over a car.
I dealt with losing my fiance a few months later.
I dealt with depression (and still do) for 25 years.
I dealt with 4 years of homelessness in my car, in an area that it was illegal to sleep in your car.
I dealt with a surgery while i was homeless.
I dealt with hospitalization for hypertension in my late 20s.
I dealt with kidney failure, which was caused by the previously mentioned hypertension.
I dealt with 5 hours of hemodialysis for months.
I dealt with 4 years of peritoneal dialysis.
I dealt with 4-5 surgeries during those 4 years of dialysis, including a transplant.
I dealt with 6 kidney stones in those 4 years, despite barely making urine.
I dealt with a number of other issues during those 4 years, such as gout, tmj, multiple infections, fatigue and more.
I dealt with having multiple superficial blood clots and hardening of the arteries. The first time in both legs, and i could barely walk. The second time in both arms/hands and i could barely change the channel on the remote.
I dealt with recently being diagnosed with conditions in both hips that is very painful and the only remedy is a hip replacement, which is not advised because i have a 9% higher chance to get infected, which is no small process to get past. Which was likely caused by my transplant. Also i need to stay off my feet because walking, and even repetitious movements can make the condition worse. One hip is still doing ok, they just need to drill into the ball of my hip to prevent it from getting as bad as the other.
I dealt with visiting my (now) ex and having her dump me the day after she promised she wouldn't, and 2 days later spending 10 days in the hospital.
I dealt with an 8 day stay in the hospital from a virus i received through the kidney that went undiagnosed for weeks.
I dealt with kidney rejection that left me in the hospital.
I dealt with the fact that my ex, at least in part, left me because my health is too bad to allow me to participate in activities she wants to share with a husband. And my depression has made it difficult for me to do well financially. And now having both at the same time, i'm even more stuck.
Need i go on or do you still think i'm some clueless whiner that needs to go observe others misery to feel better about myself, as you suggest?
You walk around this site talking down to people, without an ounce of love in any single statement i've ever seen come out of your mouth about any person or topic. The only love i see you have is loving to judge others and presume to know others lives. If there was one person whose advice i would respect and listen to, you are way down on the list of options.
I dealt with watching my mom slowly die for 12 years, until i was 21.
I dealt with the sense of failure i felt knowing the last thoughts my mom must've had about me is what a failure of a son i was.
I dealt with suicidal thoughts.
I dealt with sleeping with a large knife under my pillow, just because it was comforting.
I dealt with anger and bitterness.
I dealt with my fiance turning her back on me and refusing to come to my mothers funeral with me, over a car.
I dealt with losing my fiance a few months later.
I dealt with depression (and still do) for 25 years.
I dealt with 4 years of homelessness in my car, in an area that it was illegal to sleep in your car.
I dealt with a surgery while i was homeless.
I dealt with hospitalization for hypertension in my late 20s.
I dealt with kidney failure, which was caused by the previously mentioned hypertension.
I dealt with 5 hours of hemodialysis for months.
I dealt with 4 years of peritoneal dialysis.
I dealt with 4-5 surgeries during those 4 years of dialysis, including a transplant.
I dealt with 6 kidney stones in those 4 years, despite barely making urine.
I dealt with a number of other issues during those 4 years, such as gout, tmj, multiple infections, fatigue and more.
I dealt with having multiple superficial blood clots and hardening of the arteries. The first time in both legs, and i could barely walk. The second time in both arms/hands and i could barely change the channel on the remote.
I dealt with recently being diagnosed with conditions in both hips that is very painful and the only remedy is a hip replacement, which is not advised because i have a 9% higher chance to get infected, which is no small process to get past. Which was likely caused by my transplant. Also i need to stay off my feet because walking, and even repetitious movements can make the condition worse. One hip is still doing ok, they just need to drill into the ball of my hip to prevent it from getting as bad as the other.
I dealt with visiting my (now) ex and having her dump me the day after she promised she wouldn't, and 2 days later spending 10 days in the hospital.
I dealt with an 8 day stay in the hospital from a virus i received through the kidney that went undiagnosed for weeks.
I dealt with kidney rejection that left me in the hospital.
I dealt with the fact that my ex, at least in part, left me because my health is too bad to allow me to participate in activities she wants to share with a husband. And my depression has made it difficult for me to do well financially. And now having both at the same time, i'm even more stuck.
Need i go on or do you still think i'm some clueless whiner that needs to go observe others misery to feel better about myself, as you suggest?
You walk around this site talking down to people, without an ounce of love in any single statement i've ever seen come out of your mouth about any person or topic. The only love i see you have is loving to judge others and presume to know others lives. If there was one person whose advice i would respect and listen to, you are way down on the list of options.
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