The Banned Game

[Lanolin]

Miss Greenlips Hine spiraled down around the Garbage Patch to land the Solent near a raft of floating tyres jutting out amongst the floating red bull cans and plastic straws and red cups. There amongst the flotsam and jetsam was the baby in the basket, seeminly oblivious to the chaotic surrounds, bundled tightly in a blanket and floating on a black rubber lilo raft, which also had bottles and cans and other items stuffed to the gills of the gunwhales around the basket.

The sea was relatively still and gently swirling in an anticlockwise direction of the vast eddy that the garbage patch had created, and must have been there for some time, as seaweed and molluscs and barnacles had begun to grow on the bulkier items.

Ms Hunter, you'll need to man the controls while I pull bubs in. Poor mite will die of exposure if we dont.

Rachel nodded dumbly, she was in no state to move since shed just regurgitated all of her lunch back into her lunch bag. Although it was a very healthy lunch and was now mashed up into a smoothie and looked more like baby food.

Miss Greenlips Hine martialed her rescue gear, ropes and lifejacket.
Pounamu to LALA : Code Moses rescue operation imminent. Lord help us, walking on water might be good at this time. I am sure those dastardly eagles have something to do with this!

 

[Moses_Young]

Tzipora covered her mouth to hide a yawn. "Lots of fake news on the International-Spy-Vision tonight," she called out to the Great Chieftain, who was busily preparing the dinner in the great kitchen of the secret Antarctic Fortress.

"Tell me about it," called out the Great Chieftain. "What's this thing they've got with making out that your mother's name is Tizzy?"

Tzipora laughed. "That's not the only thing they got wrong. They're making out that you and she are... well... an item..."

The Chieftain gasped, and in his shock nearly sliced a finger instead of a carrot. "Really? That crosses a line. I have a good mind to write an angry letter to the International Institute of Ethics in Propaganda, demanding they take punitive action," he fumed.

"It wouldn't do any good. You know the International Institute of Ethics in Propaganda is wholly subsidised by the very nations engaging in the propaganda war. I personally would take it as a complement." Tzipora responded.

The Chieftain raised his eyebrows questioningly. "How so?" he asked.

"It's really a tacit admission that you are handsome and dashing enough to make even an old, insane lady from Japovia fall in love with you. Really means you are irresistable to most everybody," Tzipora smiled.

The Chieftain nodded grudgingly. "I hadn't thought of it that way. I must say, Japovians aren't known for showing affection. Especially, the elderly and insane female Japovians. Most of those would as soon stab one in one's sleep, as put out the milk for the cat in the morning."

"Just goes to show what a good and kindly Chieftain you are, doesn't it?" Tzipora commented soothingly.

"You know, Tzipora, at first I had my doubts about you, but I'm starting to believe those doubts might have been the first time in my life I've actually been wrong..." the Chieftain commented.

"Come and watch Ruby and the incredible Tommy with me," the other invited. "Let the cook finish dinner. There's been an exciting new development. The three clones have applied for jobs at the pizza shop, and because they are so - well - good at everything, they're really go to show Mr Hulk up. And little does Ruby know that the incredible Tommy has rather an embarrassing skin condition..."

"Oh?" asked the Great Chieftain.

"Sir," Mordecai responded, entering the room. "When the incredible Tommy gets jealous - and he sure is going to be jealous competing with your three clones at the pizza shop - his skin..." Mordecai's voice trailed off.

"It turns green!" Tzipora blurted out. "His skin turns green when he's jealous!"

The Chieftain looked somewhat disgusted. "But what about 'Mosestarian Malady'? How are the clones going to get jobs at Ruby's pizza place, with all the public concern about Mosestarian Malady, and Ruby's advertisement which explicitly stated 'Must not be Mosestarian'?"

"Nonsense!" interrupted Mordecai. "There's no such thing as 'Mosestarian Malady'".

"We know that," explained the Chieftain. "But what about the pizza place recruitment staff?"

"Aha!" advised Tzipora knowingly. "That's where the fake 'I'm-Not-Mosestarian' passports come in, I think," she commented with a wink.

 

[Ruby123]

Empress Ruby applied her red lipstick and coat of lush mascara preparing for her weekly zoom meeting with E Jenny and E Lanolin. She turned her computer on waiting for the other two to appear. Never did they miss their weekly meeting. However this time was different, neither of them joined.

That's odd the Empress thought. Something was not right, she could feel it.
"Mr Hulk, could you come here" she yelled out to her faithful, handsome body guard.
She explained what had happened to him and he assured her that he would investigate.

An hour later he returned and he looked a little pale.

"Sit down Empress" he stuttered. "It seems E Lanolin plane has crashed into the Red Sea and she is currently clinging onto a tyre floating in the sea alongside Ms Greenlips and what looks like a little baby" Hulk explained. The Empress gasped "What!!!" she shrieked.

"Ms JennyMae is also in a pickle. She is currently in the Mosestarian headquarters being interrogated by Ms Tizzy, and get this Hulk went on to explain. They think we call Tizzy's 94 year old mother Tizzy and not her daughter" Hulk continued.

"Ridiculous" shrieked Ruby. "Is the Empress Jenny and E Lanolin ok" asked Ruby.

"Yes so far" Hulk replied. Jenny is surrounded by the wicked one, his three clones, his mistress Tizzy and now there is a nephew who has appeared. The nephew seems to fancy Ms Jenny and the wicked one and his equally wicked mistress are not happy about it" Hulk reported.

"E Lanolin is getting a little weak paddling but help is on the way. My brother Lenny who is a marine has been notified and is on his way right now to rescue them" Hulk further reported.

 

[Ruby123]

BREAKING NEWS:

Empress Lanolin found in Red Sea alive with another strange woman and baby.
Hero - Mr Hulk

Empress Jennymae held hostage by villian Moses and mistress Tizzy and mother in law Lizzy.
Investigator - Mr Hulk and his brother in the marines.

Further updates another episode lol.

 

[Moses_Young]

At that moment, the door alarm to announce new customers sounded, and a now-familiar, handsome-but-yet-strange-looking figure entered the pizza shop

"I'm sorry sir, but we're closed now. It's Sunday evening," E-Ruby announced. She could sense the Hulk tensing up, in case he was needed to evict this intruder from the pizza shop.

"All my life, I have dreamed about becoming employed in a pizza-production facility," the strange man began. "I can start work immediately. Even now. I can keep your pizza shop open on Sunday evening!" The man smiled broadly, which revealed a gold tooth that seemed to wink his honesty to E-Ruby and her impressive-looking body-guard.

Tommy did not look impressed, and E-Ruby noticed, even perhaps a shade green. "Possibly it is just the lighting in here," she thought to herself.

 

[Ruby123]

E Ruby asked to see his resume and noticed he had experience in working for a pizza place. She decided she would hire him if he made her the perfect pizza. She did not specify any particular toppings and left it up to him. She did however request no anchovies, the thought of it made her gag.

"Go ahead" she said to this strange man with the gold tooth and walked away. "I will be sitting in the next room when it is ready to be served" she said.

She looked over at Mr Hulk and his green tinge was still present. "Are you feeling ok Mr Hulk" she asked concerned.
"Yes" he said rather abruptly.
"Mr Hulk" she said noticing a change in his demeanor. "You dont seem yourself tonight and you are starting to resemble Kermit" she chuckled. "Do you need some time off" she asked.
"Something does not seem right about this gold tooth man" he whispered. "I think I sense trouble"
E Ruby gasped.

 

[Moses_Young]

The strange-looking but handsome man set about immediately to create the perfect pizza. It was to be a ham-and-pineapple pizza, of course, with olives. "But without the pineapple", he thought to himself, "to make it even better."

"And perhaps," he thought to himself again, "without the olives. Nobody likes olives on a perfect pizza."

Eagle Two got to thinking further. "Perhaps E-Ruby was a vegetarian, and didn't like ham. Or one of those anti-animal-cruelty activists, who didn't like harvesting pigs for their delicious bacon. Or perhaps she was part-Jewish, or...", he shuddered, "was running a Halal establishment." He decided to cut out the ham aswell, just to be on the safe side.

The pizza was finally ready, and in 30 minutes (he had to start up the pizza oven again, and get out all the ingredients that had been packed away), he presented it confidently to E-Ruby and Tommy. "A ham-and-pineapple pizza, with olives!" he announced proudly.

"But with the pineapple and olives cut back to perfection," he added. "And halal-friendly levels of ham," he finished.

 

[Lanolin]

The rescue operation was successful.
Miss Greenlips Hine hauled in the raft onto the Solent with the baby in the basket who was beginning to grizzle.
Rachel fixed a regurgitated smoothie in an improvised sippy cup while listening for updates on the radio from President Lanolin, who had read about 2/3rds of the Babysitters Club books series and knew just what to do.

Miss Greenlips Hine asked Rachel if she remembered what she did with her own children who were now grown up. Rachel shook her head. Rod gave them to the nannies, I was busy getting my body back in shape. I do remember he did sing 'Do ya think Im sexy' with them though.

Miss Greenlips Hine pursed her lips even further. She didnt want to say out loud she was stuck in the middle of the Red sea with a blonde bimbo to President Lanolin but her silence was speaking volumes.

the radio interrupted - LA to Pounamu: Have you got nappies? Grab a pashmina and some sanitary pads and some hair clips. Ms Hunter will have to hold the baby. Can you get back to Lanolinland? I have notified Empress Ruby. Some wild rumours are putting out that I have crashed in the sea and need rescuing. Her mascara empire will have to wait. Any ID on the basket?

Rachel and Miss Greenlips Hine looked at each other and then at the baby. They had no idea who's it was, though maybe the objects stuffed on the raft would give them a clue. There was a cans of powder like substance with a goat on it that looked like Blue Milk made in Japovia. Miss Greenlips Hine saw several crumpled pieces of paper stuffed in the gunwhale. She uncrumpled one of them. It was a letter.

Dear Wicked one, it read. Miss Greenlips Hine squinted but the rest was indecipherable.

Rachel spotted a broken red stiletto heel poking out of the raft that had some seaweed stuck in it tied to ribbon and jammed into the side was an canceled passport. It was from Mosetaria.

 

[jennymae]

Captain Biden tried to remember what the red alert was all about. Something related to some lady being held hostage somewhere. Or was it a war going on? Maybe his wife had asked him to go get some groceries on his way home? Was he at home or not? He put on his super hero outfit and it all became clear. The lovely Ms Jenny needed to be rescued from the evil Chieftain. He couldn’t do it alone, though, and alerted Captain Trump. Once in his super hero outfit Captain Trump joined Captain Biden and the two old, yet altruistic geezers, was en route to Antarctica.

They made a stop in Argentina to have a fistfight over the 2020 general, but two black eyes made them realize that their energy needed to be put elsewhere. Jill and Mel had been a little resentful about the two of them being so eager to save a beautiful young lady, but let’s be honest, Ms Jenny also represented a strategical asset.

Inside the massive walls of the Wicked fortress Ms Jenny was strapped to Ms Tsiaporas torture device. The gallant nephew was sound asleep after receiving a knock out pill from the good lady of torture and interrogation. The Wicked one was trying to frame Empress Ruby by making pizza without ingredients. These people didn’t play games.

“Now, my dear, this is a nail polish drier which I’m going to fry your nails with for starters”, Ms Tsiapora chuckled in a friendly tone. “You will experience a horrible pain when your nails are catching fire, but just you relax. You will forget all about your nails when your fingers are burning.” The gruesome woman cackled heinously and Ms Jenny fainted again.

Meanwhile, on the outside. Through a partly shattered window the two geezer super heroes was trying to get on terms with the situation.

 

[Moses_Young]

"What was that noise?" Tzipora asked suddenly.

The Great Chieftain shrugged. "Since Hairy's troops have departed, this place is pretty much unguarded. It could be anyone."

"Perhaps you should investigate?" the attractive Japovian warrioress suggested helpfully.

"So long as they don't use the bathroom, the lounge, the kitchen or the Inner Sanctum, I'm pretty much okay with visitors," explained the Chieftain.

"But what if they are here to abduct me, and sell me as a slave to some ugly, Hungarian-born American philanthropist? My reputation could be sullied!" the Japovian warrioress argued.

Moses the Younger nodded understandingly. Tzipora had been a very useful asset to the Mosestarian cause, but she did come with her weaknesses, of which, being female was chief. Fortunately, faithful Mordecai was nearby. Probably not quite as useful as Tzipora in the brains department, but as least without all the shortcomings, the Chieftain thought to himself.

The Chieftain and his cousin had almost completed their survey of the fortress. The final room left was the Theatre and Media Centre, which had been idle since the end of the Mosestarian-Rubyland war, and the need for honest propaganda had subsided.

Mordecai briskly pushed open the door and the Chieftain stepped into the room, expecting to find some starving arctic rats who'd been searching for a place to call home, or something similar. However, the sight that met his eyes was much worse.

An actress - presumably by the name of Ms Tsiapora, judging by her name tag, if indeed, even that could be trusted - was in the process of warming up a nail polish drier. It appeared that she intended to inflict horrible pain upon the fingers of an unconscious woman, who looked strangely familiar to the Chieftain.

Suddenly, the Chieftain recognised the unconscious woman. She was only half as beautiful as he remembered. "No, probably less than half... Possibly a tenth as beautiful..." he corrected himself. She looked different somehow... Something about her hair. Yes, that was it. No longer blazing-red, the lady's hair was a common blonde colour. The colour hair one sees all too frequently in advertisements and propaganda. "So this was her little game, eh?" he shook his head sadly. "Not content to destroy his guest room and put a large hole in the wall last time, now she was here involved with some sort of clandestine propaganda operation."

"That will be enough of that!" exclaimed the Chieftain, as he strode over and knocked the nail polish drier out of the actress's hands. "There is to be no torture in my fortress!" he exclaimed firmly. "We don't embrace such Philistine practices" he chided the actress sternly.

Ms Tsiapora didn't seem to know what to say. She looked up at the camera, to see if she was still being recorded for propaganda purposes... This hadn't been part of the script. "Uhhhh..... Yes we are! We are modern day Mosestarian Philistines, and I am your mistress, and we are exacting our terrible vengeance upon the innocent empress of Jennymaesia..."

Moses the Younger shook his head at the shoddy acting. "If you are my mistress, and the whole world knows I am the greatest chauvinist since, errrr... well, let's just say Donald Trump for want of a more notable chauvinist, why would I let you keep the title 'miz'? Surely someone so well-versed in the chauvinist arts as I, would demand his mistress take the title 'miss', or even... 'missus'?"

The poor actress known as Ms Tsiapora nodded in reluctant agreement. "Really," she thought to herself, "Who writes these scripts? Even I would have known that."

"Mister Mordecai", announced the Chieftain grandly, "take these tresspassers to the local Antarctic constabulary", gesturing to Ms Tsiapora and the homeless-looking man asleep nearby, "where they will be tried for such crimes as gruesome attempted torture of an empress, false propagandising of a reputable nation, and unspeakable, slanderous accusations against Mosestaria."

As Mister Mordecai busied himself with the arrest and binding of the criminal trespassers, the Great Chieftain gently awakened the unconscious empress with smelling salts. "You", he announced, "will be staying in our specially-insured guest-room this time, given the damage you caused before on your way out."

 

[Ruby123]

Mr Hulk left for his one month holiday and E Ruby dined alone. She was eagerly waiting for this pizza that was being prepared by this strange man with the golden tooth. She had not eaten all day so she was especially looking forward to it.
She heard the oven alarm go off and made her way to the dining table. The strange man placed the hot pizza on the serving tray and bought it to E Ruby.

She looked at the pizza and gasped. "This is your pizza" she asked the strange man. Where is all the pineapple, olives and bacon. Did we run out. This looks like it is vegetarian"

"Made my specialty" the man replied grinning.
E Ruby took her first bite. Hot but very plain. No spice, just bland. She tried another slice, same thing. She reached for her third but strangely felt very sleepy indeed. Her arm gave way and she fell off her chair. It seems she had slipped into some kind of coma.

Meanwhile E Jenny was taken into the Mosestarian home and was given a section of the mansion to recuperate from her ordeal. The staff were given strict orders to bring her back to health and to fix the problem with her hair. A special serum was applied and her blonde temporary hair was quickly growing back to her long red mane. She was well pleased.

E Lanolin along with Rachel Hunter were looking after the screaming baby. E Lanolin was trying to find out who her mother was but was not having much luck. She guessed it may have been a foreign woman who gave birth as the baby did not look like the Lanolin clan. Who could be the mother E Lanolin wondered?

 

[Moses_Young]

It appeared to Eagle Two that what had been prophecised by the late great, great, great, great grandmother Rubina might be on the cusp of coming true. And when the late great, great, great, great grandma Rubina said "prophecised", the dear lady meant prophecised. Someone could well be getting the chop for this incident.

Rummaging through E Ruby's handbag, he came across her phone. Utilising the "Emergency" access of her phone, he quickly called the Incredible Tommy.

"Tommy speaking. You did decide to change your mind last minute, eh?" said Tommy's voice cheerfully. "Good for you, E-Rubes. I look forward to seeing you at the airport."

"Uhhh... Errr..... No, Tommy," said Eagle Two gruffly.

"Hey! Who is this? Where is Ruby?" an angrier sounding Tommy asked.

"It's me - Eagle Two! There've been..... some complications....." confessed Eagle Two. "I think Ruby... may be a vegetarian!"

"What?" exclaimed the other. "Nonsense. She ate a steak with me last night. I want to speak to Ruby. Put her on please... Now!"

"Uhhhh.... Errr..... Well, then she's probably part-Jewish," Eagle Two explained. "Yes, that's it. I know she can't be the other one... She's too kindly for that..."

"Listen here, you obnoxious, gold-toothed fiend!" said Tommy shortly. "If you're trying to make me change my mind about Ruby, it won't work. Put her on..."

"Well, she really is kind of occupied..." Eagle Two's voice trailed off.

"You called on Ruby's phone. I presume - perhaps too generously - that means Ruby knows you are calling. I want to speak to Ruby. And I want to speak to her now!"

"Uhhhh.... Yes....." explained Eagle Two awkwardly. "Ruby really needs your help..... Immediately..... I think she choked on some bacon!" blurted out Eagle Two.

"Are you serious!" exclaimed Tommy. "My plane leaves in 3 hours. Can I speak to her please?"

"She's unconscious!" Eagle Two noted curtly.

"Okay," Tommy exclaimed. "I need you to call an ambulance. Have you called an ambulance? I'm on my way!" he stated, without waiting for an answer.

Eagle Two looked glumly at his I'm-Not-Mosestarian-Passport. He was fairly sure the ambulance crew would demand identification before they attended, and was not sure the credentials of his fake passport would register.

He looked sadly down at E-Ruby. "Why, oh why did I have to choose *ham* and pineapple?" he wondered.

 

[Ruby123]

Tommy, otherwise known as Hulk put the phone down having talked with the gold tooth man.
"Looks like he believed me" he said grinning. "Now to enjoy this Empire myself"
It seemed Tommy the handsome man E Ruby trusted had placed bacon on the pizza the gold toothed man made knowing that Ruby was severely allergic to it.
First things first Tommy thought. Get rid of the spoilt cat and change the colour scheme of this palace to something more manly.
"Goodbye dear Ruby" he sneered. "Hello empire and number one spot in the magazines for "most eligible bachelor"

 

[Lanolin]

The Solent made its way back to Lanolinland, per President Lanolins orders.

The foundling looked like definitely abandoned from Mosetaria but its welfare was in question. Now the baby had acquired not one but three mamas, yet there was no dad. Where was the dad? How could he do this? Did he kill the mum as well?

Aunty Rachel was fixing more baby smoothie, discarding the expired Japovian blue milk and using Lanolinland fresh milk, and Whaea Hine arranged to enrol bubs in her Kohanga Reo near Ohakune Village close go the guinea pig school. GodMama Lanolin meanwhile did some babywhispering and read bedtime stories to soothe bub, changed nappies and gave baths.

At the same time she wondered if she should put this out on the Lanovision, but how would she word it? She did not want to be accused of kidnapping on international waters

Do you know where your children are?
FOUND, in RED Sea Garbage Patch
BABY, about 1 month old

contact the Beehive ASAP

 

[Moses_Young]

Tommy, otherwise known as Hulk put the phone down having talked with the gold tooth man.
"Looks like he believed me" he said grinning. "Now to enjoy this Empire myself"
It seemed Tommy the handsome man E Ruby trusted had placed bacon on the pizza the gold toothed man made knowing that Ruby was severely allergic to it.
First things first Tommy thought. Get rid of the spoilt cat and change the colour scheme of this palace to something more manly.
"Goodbye dear Ruby" he sneered. "Hello empire and number one spot in the magazines for "most eligible bachelor"

Devious!!!

 

[Lanolin]

Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall and Charles Prince of Wales thouroughly enjoyed the Royal Command Perfomance of those who didnt make Britains Got Talent. The penultimate act featured Mr Beans Teddy who had mastered the art of ventriloquism and nobody could tell on stage that Teddy was actually the REAL voice of Mr Bean.

Did I miss anything? asked the Baroness who was late getting back from intermission. She could barely contain her composure now she knew what would be the final result of the election as Santa Claus was clearly in the lead by an avalanche.

Camilla whispered sotto voce that she had recorded all the best bits on her iphone so no she hadnt missed anything as they would replay it back in the palace drawing rooms later over yet more gin and tonics.

The Baroness looked relieved as she was in need of a drink. She relaxed and watched the rest of the show and decided she would announce her big news to the couple when they got back to their royal suite.

 

[jennymae]

The Antarctic winter storm was freezing like a dancing contest in a Southern Baptist dry county. The super hero outfits wasn’t cut out for that kind of weather and the presidential top dogs desperately needed to get inside. What they saw through the window wasn’t comforting either. A beautiful lady was being tortured by another gorgeous woman.

Captain Biden: Is that AOC?
Captain Trump: Which one of them?
Captain Biden: I’m not sure.
Captain Trump: Looks more like Nancy P. or Liz C.
Captain Biden: You mean that Taiwanese lady?
Captain Trump: No, the one who went to Taiwan.
Captain Biden: Why would she go there?
Captain Trump: You tell me. You’re her boss.
Captain Biden: I knew that!
Captain Trump: Look, she’s got a machine like the one Mel’s got back home!
Captain Biden: What machine?
Captain Trump: Some nail frying stuff.
Captain Biden: What’s wrong with frying bacon and eggs?
Captain Trump: Beats me. Must be considered a treat down here.

The two alpha males pondered on how to intervene, The sight of the poor girl strapped to the bad bed made them tougher. On the other hand, the sight of the three clones and Ms T, made them want to run.

Captain Trump: Did you bring your special suitcase?
Captain Biden: What suitcase?
Captain Trump: You know, the suitcase with the knobs and codes and stuff.
Captain Biden: Was it semiautomatic? In that case I think I’ve banned it.
Captain Trump: Look, there’s that guy with the golden tooth.

They both tried to get a better look. “What’s he doing?” Captain Trump wiped some ice off the window for an even better view. “Looks like he’s scolding that torture gal”, Captain Biden said with a little more optimistic tone than just a minute before. “He sure is”, Captain Trump added. “Wait a sec, he’s taking her with him!” Captain Trump pulled out his laser gun. “Where’s your laser?” he asked Captain Biden. “I think I pushed the wrong button somewhere and accidentally banned it”, Captain Biden said awkwardly. “Here, I have an extra”, Captain Trump handed him the extra laser.

The two very mature super duper heroes cocked their pieces and went in.

 

[Moses_Young]

Eagle Two was sweating profusely when the paramedics arrived. He'd lost count of how many potential crimes he'd committed in the previous minutes. Since calling Tommy, he had phoned the Emergency Services, who, as he had suspected, had required him to provide an I'm-Not-Mosestarian-Passport number in order to allocate one of the now limited-edition ambulance fleet to his situation.

Fortunately, Eagle Two had plenty of experience rifling through the possessions of others, and was able to locate Ruby's I'm-Not-Mosestarian-Passport and record number fairly quickly. Then there was the whole dilemma about whether Ruby would need cardio-pulmonary resuscitation prior to the arrival of the ambulance, and the legal ramifications associated with this - whether he might break any ribs, could the resuscitation be perceived as assault etc. Fortunately, before Eagle Two had prepared a cushion with which to protect ribs and a rolled-up newspaper through which to deliver second-hand air, he realised that Ruby was still, in fact, breathing, and no such interventions would be required.

"That will save an inordinate amount on lawyers fees", he had sighed relievedly.

"What happened?" the voice of the lead paramedic brought Eagle Two's mind from the recent-past to the present.

"She ate some bacon..." Eagle Two's voice trailed off.

The lead paramedic's eyebrows raised. "Bacon? That's not enough to explain this reaction..."

"I think she might be... Jewish..." Eagle Two answered, whispering the last part of his sentence.

"Not according to her I'm-Not-Mosestarian-Passport," the lead paramedic replied frowning. "It says here she is Christian..." he noted, showing Eagle Two the display of Ruby's medical particulars on his medi-pad, displayed since his scan of the code on her I'm-Not-Mosestarian-Passport.

Eagle Two noticed all sorts of other interesting information was included here. In addition to Ruby's medical history of amnesia, he quickly noted there were records of her religion, denomination, date of baptism, education records, tax history, income streams, bank accounts... even divorce proceedings against an... estranged husband?

"Seems to me you're not being entirely honest with us," the lead paramedic interrupted Eagle Two's thoughts. "We're going to need to take a record of your I'm-Not-Mosestarian-Passport, also..."

"Oh, err.... I guess it must have gotten lost in all the excitement..." Eagle Two confessed, after making a half-hearted attempt at pretending to locate his fake I'm-Not-Mosestarian-Passport. Eagle Two flashed the lead paramedic his award-winning smile, the gold tooth winking as if testament to Eagle Two's honesty and sincerity.

"Then I guess you'll be coming with us, then, won't you," the lead paramedic replied severely. "What this girl is suffering is one of the symptoms of Mosestarian Malady, and it's spread by selfish people like you, who either originate from Mosestaria, or who don't carry their I'm-Not-Mosestarian-Passports so people like me can't route out people who do originate from Mosestaria. You have basically murdered this girl, and I'm going to see that you pay for it."

"Ah," exclaimed Eagle Two, as if suddenly better understanding the request. "Here it is. It was in my pockets all along." He hesitantly handed over his fake I'm-Not-Mosestarian-Passport to the suspicious lead paramedic, as poor Ruby was wheeled by stretcher into the waiting ambulance by other members of the ambulance crew.

 

[Ruby123]

Eagle Two was released by the police and was free to go. He quickly made his way back to the Mosestarian headquarters.
"Phew, that was a close call" he thought. "I'll be glad to get back home." He started to plan what he was going to do when he got home. Of course he would meet up with the other two clones as well as report back to the wicked one and his mistress Tizzy. He hoped to avoid the insane mother in law Lizzy. She made his skin crawl.
His plane touched down and he ordered an Uber delivering him to the Mosestarian headquarters. He was questioned by the Mosestarian wicked one as to what happened whilst in Rubyland. His reply was that nothing major had happened there.

Meanwhile back in the Rubyland HQ, Mr Hulk was getting the place redecorated. A reporter was due in an hour as they were doing an article on him for potential bachelor of the year. He was in the process of getting his hair cut for the photo shoot.

The orderlies wheeled E Ruby into intensive care. Her pulse was weak and they hooked her up to all the machines in the room. The specialist checked her vitals and shook his head.
"Not looking good" he said to the nurse. "It's touch and go"

Eagle 1,2 and 3 met up at the local cafe and discussed their ventures.

 

[Moses_Young]

"Wow! What an adventure!" exclaimed Eagle Three, pulling his woolen hood around his head more tightly.

"I can't believe you left that poor woman to her fate, after all she risked for you", scolded Eagle One. "You are... just like your father..."

Eagle One stood to leave, a look of disapproval on his face as he wrapped his Antarctic explorer's clothes around him more tightly. "What kind of entrepreneur builds a cafe all the way out here anyway", he wondered darkly.

At that moment, a group of four walked in. One of the group looked very familiar - tall, handsome-but-strange-looking, with a distinguished beard, gold tooth, iron fist... And with bruises on his face, as if he had recently been beaten. Another in the group was incredibly beautiful - Eagle One found he had turn his face away as his eyes were mysteriously magnetised by her long, silky, blazing-red hair - almost if it were magical hair... He noticed also that Eagle Three was sitting lower in his seat and hiding his face, as if he recognised the beautiful woman, but didn't want to be recognised by her... Another of the newcomers appeared to be suffering a similar ailment to Tzipora's mother. He looked as if he wouldn't even know his own name - indeed, it was a wonder he could wander about in the cafe without getting himself lost. The final figure had some sort of steely determination about him - in his day, he must have been a formidable character, but he now looked well-past his prime, his ageing body driven by a much stronger will.