"We're Having a Baby!!! And We Want YOU To Foot The Bill."

[seoulsearch]

Actually, Nick and Lynx, as you know, my mind is usually headed in at least 30 different directions, and your posts have each pinpointed very specific thoughts I've had about this topic.

My original questions in this thread were things such as, should missionary families have a right to just decide or try to have more kids... and expect people to pay for it? Then what about everyday, Bible believing families who are also called by God to expand their families? Do we fund missionary families and leave everyone else to struggle on their own?

Which leads directly into Lynx's point: how much should I personally sacrifice or cut back in order to help those in missions, ministry, and in general, need help?

Because I'm someone who usually gets up at 2 in the morning for work, the last thing I want to do when I crawl home after a nonstop day is prepare food. I would love to buy some sort of takeout lunch and dinner every day (I've been guilty of buying a lot of $5 sandwiches lately... which I need to stop doing because it's so much cheaper to pack my own.)

But I don't, because I'm trying to save money, and part of the reason is to be able to have something to help other people. However, as Lynx illustrated, it very quickly becomes a question of how much should I cut back, and in what areas, and who is better served by what limited resources I have?

I'll find myself in Walmart looking at nail polish and thinking, Beh, I don't need that... I could save it or use it for (a certain cause I support.) But then you start to feel as if you're sacrificing everything you enjoy for other people... and it becomes a fine balance between willful, cheerful giving, and the drudging misery of obligation.

 

[DanielTate]

Bless the kids who have nothing.

 

[Lynx]

seoulsearch: Yeah, what you said.

Also people assume you are going to forego anything you want in the name of giving to others just because "that's what christians are supposed to do." I remember when I was in a music chatroom (basically a tech support chat for a music program I use) and I mentioned my church got a new sound board that I was connecting and setting up. Another person in that chatroom pretty much attacked me because "you should be giving that money to help the poor." I don't have the chat log, but to the best of my memory it went a bit like this:

"We had to get a new sound board, ours was shot."

"What if someone who's poor needed that money? Gonna show him your sound board?"

"Our church helps out a lot of poor people in this community."

"But you could help more people if you hadn't bought a new sound board."

"We help more than most. How much have you given to help the poor?"

"That's not my job. You christians are always talking about charity. You're supposed to be helping them."

"Well maybe if you rock bands helped out a bit we wouldn't have to help them so much."


As I recall that was the last thing said. He left me alone after that. I mention it in this thread because the entitlement attitude (which actually IS what this thread seems to be about... you thought I was going way off topic, didn't ya?) really gets on my nerves. "It's your job to give up anything you want because you're SUPPOSED to be only spending enough to cover your basic necessities and giving the rest to others." Um... yeah, where did you get your concept of what christians are all about?

 

[seoulsearch]

Even Jesus encountered this.

When he was anointed with a bottle of perfume (that, in my Bible footnotes, was said to cost an entire year's wages), people criticized this and said the money should have been spent on the poor. And Jesus said that they would always have the poor, but would not always have Him.

So what's a good yearly wage these days? $40,000? That's a lot of money. And I can see how anointing Jesus with it is certainly in a very unique class of its own.

But this is something I wonder a lot--how much are we allowed to spend on ourselves, and how much should we be scrimping by to help others? My parents entire ministry is financial counseling and getting people out of debt. One of the first things they'll ask people to do is keep track of everything they spend for a week, and if there are a lot of things such as Starbuck runs and eating out, that's one of the first things they'll suggest cutting back on (in the interest of paying off their own debts.)

However, that was how I was taught to live in my everyday, normal life. And so I wonder how much I'm allowed to spend on convenience... or how hard I need to work to have money to give to others.

I always wonder... if Abraham and Sarah were here today, what would their house look like? As I wrote in another post, it's estimated the Abraham very well could have been a billionaire. Would he have owned 65 million dollar planes like Creflo Dollar? Would have have lived in a huge mansion that would blow away any Hollywood star? Would Sarah shop at Walmart, or would everything they needed be exclusive and imported? How much would they be expected to give away?

And I wonder, even when they did live... Did they give a good portion of their crops and flocks to others?

These are the kinds of things I think about in my everyday life when I receive yet another newsletter asking or donations...

 

[Jilly81]

One thing about this, Kim. I agree that expecting others to fund babies isn't right. However, I suspect that although God wants us to keep things in prayer and ask Him how much to give, to which group, etc, He would probably rather that you assisted children by the things you lean toward anyway, which I think is the craft stuff. As in, maybe a child at church has somewhat delinquent parents (or maybe great ones who just need a break) and it would be good to do a craft with them. I know that I personally like sort of pretending that a child is mine for an hour or so while I show them how to do something and answer all their questions (which generally even patient parents are REALLY tired of doing). Anyway, just wanted to point out that that child would have potential to grow into a godly person just like the missionary's child, and then you sort of get to "share" it more. I honestly believe that "give and it shall be given unto you" is not just concerning money .

 

[Catlynn]

So, I didn't read the entire thread because it's on my phone and it hurts my eyes. But my two cents would be that if God has called you to give then I say give! I think that the Holy Spirit is perfectly capable of letting you know who you should give your money to. But after you give it, I don't think it's any of your business what they do with it. That's between them and God. If you feel that you've done what God has told you to do, then it is done. Awesome! I think God is perfectly capable of saying, "Hey, you see that person right next to you (family/single mother/single guy even)? Yeah, you should give to them right now." Just be prayerful, listening to the prompting of the Holy Spirit always, and trust Him to speak to others as well. But don't spend time worrying or being anxious about whether or not you think these families or individuals actually "deserve" or "need" your money more than someone else. God sees the big picture, and probably has a much better understanding of what is needed and for what purpose. All we gotta do is obey.

 

[Fenner]

Agree Caitlyn. I can't tell you how many times I've been somewhere, like Starbucks and I hear or feel, buy his/her coffee. I usually follow orders. Maybe that person just needed someone to be nice to them.

 

[Catlynn]

The kindness of God leads people to repentance. Many times we are the hands and feet that God uses to show that kindness. All we gotta do is remain in His presence, listen to His voice, and obey what He says. good stuff.

 

[Catlynn]

Also, in reply to the question of, "Where's the line to be drawn in how much we give and what we do for ourselves?" I think that's a question with a different answer for every person and every situation. I don't think there's one cookie cutter answer. God is fully capable of talking to us and making His will known, or convicting us when we need to change something. Lean hard on Him, press in to Him, sit at his feet every single day so that you may hear and know His voice in every situation. I personally believe that the verse that says, "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." means that when we are delighting in the lord, when we are pressing in, He PUTS His desires IN us. So often, I trust that verse and go by what I want to do/give. When it's from Him it isn't grudgingly that I give, but cheerfully. No regrets, no bitterness, just love and peace. When it's God, it's full of joy and peace and every other fruit of the spirit.

 

[violakat]

I'm complete agreement with Grace on this issue.

Also, for those who believe missionaries should not have children, or even be married, two things needs to be considered in regards to missionaries:

First, in some areas, families, even in hostile areas, are much better received then a single person. (Also, some mission organizations will not send you out as a full-time missionary unless you are married.)

Second, the Bible states that we are to take care of orphans. If a community totally disregards the orphaned child, should the missionary let that child die?