What does being "unequally yoked" mean to YOU?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
J

Jullianna

Guest
#1
imagesCAJ76TAD.jpg

We hear it all the time. But what does it mean to YOU?

The scripture says not to be with an unbeliever, but is there more to it than this?

Can believers also be unequally yoked with one another with regard to spiritual maturity?

Have you experienced this? Dated a non-believer? Dated someone less spiritually mature?

What is the impact?

What happened?
imagesCA7WQ9RR.jpg
 
D

dalconn

Guest
#2
Duet 22:10 says not to team an ox with a donkey when it comes time to plow the field. As far as maturity levels are concerned the older are to be patient with the younger
 
May 9, 2012
1,514
25
0
#3
One of my ex's was one of those who claimed to be a Christian. He was one of those who always cried out "Don't judge me!". My parents didn't like him from the beginning but I didn't listen. For a while, it drove a wedge between us because "I loved him" and they could never understand. After I broke up with him, I began to see the truth and that my relationship with the Savior is more important to me than a relationship that could make me feel "loved". I am going through the same thing with my cousin now and it is so hard to share my experiences with her without being looked at as some kind of hypocrite.
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#4
Let's talk spirituality levels.


Level 10 is highest.
Level 1 is lowest.


Person A is level 10.
Person B is level 4.


Person A shows interest in person B.
Person A knows better than to fall for person B.
Person A falls regardless.


This results in person A faltering in their walk with God.


Do we blame person B for bringing them down?
Nope.


Person A brought their self down by falling for person B.


It doesn't matter if person A is known for being strong, giving great guidance, or whatever.
Person A can't blame it on B, simply because B is a level 4,
Person A can't play the helpless person in distress who got overcome by person B,


Person A is a 10 and knows better.


In the end it's not the weaker yoke that ruins us, it's our choice that ruins us.
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#5
Let's talk spirituality levels.


Level 10 is highest.
Level 1 is lowest.


Person A is level 10.
Person B is level 4.


Person A shows interest in person B.
Person A knows better than to fall for person B.
Person A falls regardless.


This results in person A faltering in their walk with God.


Do we blame person B for bringing them down?
Nope.


Person A brought their self down by falling for person B.


It doesn't matter if person A is known for being strong, giving great guidance, or whatever.
Person A can't blame it on B, simply because B is a level 4,
Person A can't play the helpless person in distress who got overcome by person B,


Person A is a 10 and knows better.


In the end it's not the weaker yoke that ruins us, it's our choice that ruins us.
So what does unequally yoked mean to me?
It doesn't mean blaming the falling or lack on the person with the weaker yoke.

Unequally yoked means that for whatever reason, a person chose a bad option, that lowers them, not because of the other person, but because of an individual choice to lower oneself into a bad yoke
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#6
One of my ex's was one of those who claimed to be a Christian. He was one of those who always cried out "Don't judge me!". My parents didn't like him from the beginning but I didn't listen. For a while, it drove a wedge between us because "I loved him" and they could never understand. After I broke up with him, I began to see the truth and that my relationship with the Savior is more important to me than a relationship that could make me feel "loved". I am going through the same thing with my cousin now and it is so hard to share my experiences with her without being looked at as some kind of hypocrite.
Sometimes i think people do that because it keeps them from having to hear what you're saying. As long as they put the focus on you and your 'hypocrisy' (which you aren't) then they don't have to look at themselves.

Perhaps, next time you have this discussion with her explain the difference between hypocrisy and your situation.
A hypocrite is a person who actively and purposefully says one thing and does another.
A person who has acted one way in the past, but has changed and is trying to help people learn by using their own mistakes as an example is not a hypocrite, but rather someone smart enough to own up to their mistake and go the other way. Or, even a person who is actively working on changing would not be a hypocrite.
If you can kill the idea that you are a hypocrite then this may force her to have to listen more and focus on herself.
 

Nautilus

Senior Member
Jun 29, 2012
6,488
53
48
#7
Let's talk spirituality levels.


Level 10 is highest.
Level 1 is lowest.


Person A is level 10.
Person B is level 4.


Person A shows interest in person B.
Person A knows better than to fall for person B.
Person A falls regardless.


This results in person A faltering in their walk with God.


Do we blame person B for bringing them down?
Nope.


Person A brought their self down by falling for person B.


It doesn't matter if person A is known for being strong, giving great guidance, or whatever.
Person A can't blame it on B, simply because B is a level 4,
Person A can't play the helpless person in distress who got overcome by person B,


Person A is a 10 and knows better.


In the end it's not the weaker yoke that ruins us, it's our choice that ruins us.
Or the 10 raises the 4 up. No need to be so negative.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#9
So what does unequally yoked mean to me?
It doesn't mean blaming the falling or lack on the person with the weaker yoke.

Unequally yoked means that for whatever reason, a person chose a bad option, that lowers them, not because of the other person, but because of an individual choice to lower oneself into a bad yoke
I agree, bad choices are always at fault, but I hope the examples people give don't result in fingerpointing. :(

One would think that being "more spiritually mature" would lend itself to making wiser choices. That's not always the case, is it? It happens far too often.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
J

Jullianna

Guest
#10
Or the 10 raises the 4 up. No need to be so negative.
You do have a point...

I think a lot of people HOPE that will be the case. Want that to be the case.
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#11
A 10 and 4 together is an example of a vast unequal yoke.
A 10 and 4 that could yield both 10-7.
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#12
Or the 10 raises the 4 up. No need to be so negative.
But the more I think about it, the more you do have a point, in relation to a few specific situations.
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#13
But the more I think about it, the more you do have a point, in relation to a few specific situations.
I mean my lens was a levels with levels lens.
In some situations the lens to measure by could be growing vs not growing.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#14
So we have Stilly's example of one who is seemingly more mature falling into a pit because of bad choices.

There is Nautilus' possibility of the one who is seemingly less mature wanting to rise in his/her relationship with God.

As JesusChica has pointed out, these are things you don't always know at first, you can be misled, etc.

So............

How do we go about determining someone else's spiritual maturity?

What do we look for?

What questions do we ask?

(Hopefully, prayer is a given.)
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#15
So we have Stilly's example of one who is seemingly more mature falling into a pit because of bad choices.

There is Nautilus' possibility of the one who is seemingly less mature wanting to rise in his/her relationship with God.

As JesusChica has pointed out, these are things you don't always know at first, you can be misled, etc.

So............

How do we go about determining someone else's spiritual maturity?

What do we look for?

What questions do we ask?

(Hopefully, prayer is a given.)
Hybrid between levels and growing vs not growing.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#16
Hybrid between levels and growing vs not growing.
I get what you mean by this, but I'm not sure some of the younger folks will. Mind elaborating for their edification, please? I'm hoping this will be helpful to a lot of people. :)
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#17
Funny how questions lead to more questions.... :rolleyes:

If you do find that you are unequally yoked with someone, + or -, what then? How do you handle it?
 
1

1still_waters

Guest
#19
I get what you mean by this, but I'm not sure some of the younger folks will. Mind elaborating for their edification, please? I'm hoping this will be helpful to a lot of people. :)
Blah, I'm liking the growing vs not growing lens the most.

The levels dynamic is harder to quantify and can lead to some spiritual gloating.

Growing vs not growing.
Maturing vs not maturing.

I'm sure there is a way that amount of maturity comes in too, I just don't know how to quantify it.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#20
While I realize that there are going to be those who may say that if person A may have the effect of raising person B up, is it discriminatory to say that person B can't have the effect of dragging person A down?

I don't mean to speak for Stilly, but I would think it acceptable to assume that a "10" would have read the warnings in the OT about what would happen if they began to marry outside of their faith and the writings of Paul regarding the matter, and have greater wisdom in this regard. However, there are times when we all SHOULD exercise greater wisdom....and don't.