Who All Would Like to See a Matchmaking Thread Here in Singles?

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Would You Like to a Matchmaking Thread in the Singles Forum?

  • Sure -- I love living dangerously! I would qualify and would like to participate.

    Votes: 17 53.1%
  • Sure -- I don't qualify/do not want to be matched but want to see everyone else's craziness.

    Votes: 4 12.5%
  • Maybe -- It would depend on... (please state your concerns in a post.)

    Votes: 4 12.5%
  • Maybe -- I have an idea for a different approach (please tell us your ideas in the thread.)

    Votes: 2 6.3%
  • Absolutely Not -- Matchmaking is of the devil. Besides, my Aunt Bertha already tried!

    Votes: 3 9.4%
  • I'm Not Touching This With a 10-Foot Pole -- I don't qualify and wouldn't read such a thread!

    Votes: 2 6.3%
  • Open for Discussion -- I could go either way, and here's why... (talk to us.) :)

    Votes: 5 15.6%

  • Total voters
    32

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,422
5,363
113
#21
I understand the concerns people are bringing up and that's exactly why I wrote this initial "brainstorming" thread in the first place.

The original Shipping Thread was like a stick of dynamite that came out of nowhere and admittedly, that's probably why it got such a reaction. The original poster basically just stepped into Singles and said, "This is the Shipping Thread, and I'm going to start it out by shipping (members) A and B."

It was just meant in good fun, not as a way for anyone to find their One True Love, so that's the basic model I had in mind when thinking about resurrecting the idea. I definitely wasn't intending to set up marriages -- just a fun way to get to know each other and interact.

As for "rules", I know people will do their own thing, so I wrote this first thread as more of a discussion rather than a declaration of laws and decrees.

My original idea was 3 threads: 1. introduction of the idea and brainstorming; 2. a thread in which people who wanted to be matched would give us some information about themselves for us to go on (I would have provided a poll and questions for people to answer as tools); and 3. the actual "matchmaking" thread in which people could suggest matches based on what people had told us about themselves in the second thread.

The reason I had mentally sketched it out like this is because the original thread was completely out of left field, so the only way to answer was to try to think of anyone you knew here off the top of your head and try to pair them with someone, with nothing to go on except what you might remember about people through their posts. This is why I thought a "buffer" thread in between that talked about who we are -- hobbies, interests, life philosophies, history of faith -- would at least give people a list of volunteer matches and a little bit about them to start with.

My only rules for those who wanted to be "matched" would have been:

1. Volunteer matches must be 20 or older.
2. Anyone can suggest a match, but anyone volunteering to be matched must be single (no other romantic attachments/relationships.)

This was also why I had thought of a second thread -- it gave people the chance to volunteer to be matches by their own free will, and let us know who was available and who wasn't.

I know it's impossible to regulate such things entirely, but I figured it was at least a start. My personal philosophy for own self when it comes to thread ideas is, "We don't know if we don't try, and even if it bombs, at least it gives us some direction of what to try next time." I had seen what was done the last time, and had different ideas I wanted to try.

However, after reading the replies here, I'm going to cancel my original ideas because I think too many people would (understandably) wind up feeling hurt and left out.

Last time I wound up writing a thread that allowed people to share about themselves and then it was up to them to make contact among themselves (no popularity contests or suggested matches involved), which had zero drama (sorry, Susanna!) but was whole lot safer. In the old CC format, you could write a poll with something like 40 answers, so I made a list of hobbies/interests/beliefs that people could check off if it applied the them. The answers were made public, so people could then see who might have the same interests as them, along with getting to know others through the discussion in the thread, and make contact if they wished.

The current poll system only allows for about 12 choices (I'm not sure of the exact number -- I didn't max out on answers this time) so a similar poll this time around would be much shorter.

If I do write another thread on this subject, I will probably default to this.
 
S

Susanna

Guest
#22
No drama, then?😞😁

I grew up as the daughter of a drama queen, so I don’t know how anti drama people are assembled😁.
 
R

Ruby123

Guest
#23
No drama, then?😞😁

I grew up as the daughter of a drama queen, so I don’t know how anti drama people are assembled😁.
Mmmmm I think the person that you are matched with Susanna must have a sense of humour, that is if you are wanting to be a candidate??:unsure::coffee:
 
S

Susanna

Guest
#24
Mmmmm I think the person that you are matched with Susanna must have a sense of humour, that is if you are wanting to be a candidate??:unsure::coffee:
Are you asking a verified drama queen if she wants to be a candidate???😄😁
 
C

CozHElivesIcanface2morrow

Guest
#26
I'll take the courageous step to present to you my perfect match 😍 There are two people on CC that I really love to see them together for real but I know they are just good friends but I would love to try anyway 😅 I love how they complement each other 😊 and they seem like they know each other pretty well.. she is a nice, kind lady. She is that kind of person anyone would want. I like her I wish she is my biological sister 😍

I am sorry I wanted my introduction to be grand but I am running out of words (limited English here) 😅


Let me again introduce to all of you my perfect match! They are @Lynx@seoulsearch Isn't it a perfect match? 😍😍😍
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,148
9,243
113
#27
It has been done before. Try something more innovative. Nobody has matched seoulsearch with subhumanoidal yet. :unsure:

*Lynx runs and hides real fast.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,148
9,243
113
#28
Well at least we have a consensus of opinion. Subhumanoidal wants less stricture and Susanna wants much drama, and "no rules" usually provides fertile ground for drama to grow.

Oh, and about drama...
I grew up as the daughter of a drama queen, so I don’t know how anti drama people are assembled😁.
We are assembled very methodically and logically of course.


As for myself, my opinion of matchmaking involves proper use of a flamethrower.

*Lynx goes off to check his equipment and make sure it is in good working order for the new matchmaker season.

By the way CozHElivesIcanface2morrow do you prefer well done or medium well? I don't do rare. :devilish:
 
R

Ruby123

Guest
#29
Mmmm it is hard to match people esp when you don't know them so I will just put my two cents worth in.

Laughinheart and Lynx

because they both start with the letter "l" and they both seem like nice people.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,422
5,363
113
#31
Mmmm it is hard to match people esp when you don't know them so I will just put my two cents worth in.

Laughinheart and Lynx

because they both start with the letter "l" and they both seem like nice people.
I think I will have to say @BlessedByGod and @Mel85. They are so fun, both of them😁.

Wow, you ladies are pretty good at this! I think I'm just gonna sit back, hit cruise control, and let y'all take over. 😍
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,422
5,363
113
#33
I'll take the courageous step to present to you my perfect match 😍 There are two people on CC that I really love to see them together for real but I know they are just good friends but I would love to try anyway 😅 I love how they complement each other 😊 and they seem like they know each other pretty well.. she is a nice, kind lady. She is that kind of person anyone would want. I like her I wish she is my biological sister 😍

I am sorry I wanted my introduction to be grand but I am running out of words (limited English here) 😅


Let me again introduce to all of you my perfect match! They are @Lynx@seoulsearch Isn't it a perfect match? 😍😍😍
CozHElives, you're always such a doll ❤.

Thank you for being so brave :D, and your English is just fine.

Lynx and I get along great as friends and are happy with our separate lives, but it's very sweet of you to mention. :)

The funny thing is, Lynx is one of the most conent I've ever met, but that last time we had a matchmaking thread, I think he was given more matches than anyone else in the thread! :ROFL:

Another reason why I'd planned to write a thread in which people volunteered to be matched is because I knew he'd never volunteer! :LOL: He's always said, "I hate matchmakers!" and everyone else was like, "Ooohhh, I know the perfect person for you!" :geek::devilish::ROFL:
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,148
9,243
113
#34
I'm just here for the flambé.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,422
5,363
113
#35
It has been done before. Try something more innovative. Nobody has matched seoulsearch with subhumanoidal yet. :unsure:

*Lynx runs and hides real fast.
LYNX!!!

To the Time Out Box, immediately!!! :LOL:

(I also think Sub mentioned a while back that he has a girlfriend, FYI.) :sneaky:
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,148
9,243
113
#36
And the flambé begins. Works every time. :devilish:
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,422
5,363
113
#39
I am here to learn some hard core matchmaking skills.
I love how this thread is going!!! :devilish:

Here's a summary for anyone trying to catch up:

* Seoulsearch: "Hey, who wants to do a matchmaking thread? It could be fun and we could meet people! But here are some things to consider..."

* Group A: "Nah, it would be too hard because people would feel left out and you're making too many rules to follow."

* Group B: "WHO THE HECK CARES??? LET'S GRAB OUR PITCHFORKS AND TORCHES AND JUST START MATCHING PEOPLE UP ANYWAY!!!" :ROFL:

LOL!!!

I LOVE this :love::geek::p, and I can't wait to see what happens next! :giggle:

Y'all are the best. ;)
 
Feb 9, 2014
168
35
28
#40
Hey All,

A long time ago, a brilliant CC member (who, unfortunately, isn't here anymore) wrote a "Shipping" (matchmaking) thread, and started it out by naming two people here whom he thought might be a good match for each other -- then invited everyone else to do the same.

As you can imagine, the thread absolutely exploded. Matchmaking seems to be an inevitable part of the single life, so hey, why not have a little fun with it here? I'm writing this initial thread to see if there's any interest, but more importantly, if we can avoid some of the pitfalls we came across last time, because some of them were quite controversial at the time. I'm always the type who is trying to "Build a Better Mouse Trap", but I guess in this case, it would be "Building a Better Spouse Trap." ;)

In all seriousness, the thread would be more about meeting people and making friendships, and definitely should NOT be seen some kind of ultimate dating medium. In fact, if people said, "Hey, I think so and so (of the same gender) seem to have a lot in common and could be really good (platonic, of course!) friends," I would welcome that as well, because making friends is what Singles is all about.

Now, I don't mean to douse all the fun, but I do think we might need to discuss a few things in advance.

Here are some of the problems we had the last time:

1. Younger members who wanted to participate (one was about 16.)

Anyone here is free to take the idea of a matchmaking thread, make their own rules (within CC standards) and run with it, but for anything I write, I'm going to have an age restriction of 20 years old and over. This is just what I comfortable with. Now, if my PM box gets overrun messages from a mob of angry teenagers, I will gently explain to them that they have not only a Teen Forum, but also a Young Adults Forum, and even the freedom to start their own thread here in the Singles Forum if they so choose.

2. Unintended matches between those with large age gaps.

Many of us here don't have our age listed, and even when we did, sometimes a member would suggest two users who had a very wide age range between them (for example, about 20 years.) It usually wasn't on purpose -- people just didn't know how old everyone was.

My proposed idea, if enough people are interested, is that I'd write a 2nd thread asking for people who actively wanted to participate and would give them a list of "Help us get to know you better" statements to give us something to work with. I know some people might not want to give their age so I'm thinking that just asking them to state an age range ("25-30".) What do you think?

This second ("Getting to Know You") thread would also be meant to hopefully curb the next two problems:

3. Last time, some of the people who were "matched" already had significant others in real life. This set off another big debate because some people said that it was all in good fun (true) and that as long as someone wasn't married, they were fair game (sorry, I can't get on board with this.)

If I had a boyfriend, I wouldn't want online strangers to be "matching" him with other women, even if it was just a "joke". I don't mean to sound like a dictator, but if I'm taking the time to write threads, I would also be setting the guidelines from past experience. I would ask that only completely unattached singles would participate. Speaking of participation...

4. Some people were "matched" -- but they weren't interested in participating at all, and people brought up their names because they were well-known at the time. A thread in which would-be participants answered voluntarily would help us know exactly what the pool was that we had to choose from. Anyone who didn't want to be matched or doesn't qualify just wouldn't answer the "Who Wants to Be Matched" thread.

And finally...

5. Although the past "Shipping" thread was meant to be in good fun and just meant as a way of possible forming friendships and getting to know people, it was probably inevitable that some people really WERE hopeful for a "REAL" match (someone they would actually start dating,) and felt genuinely sad and let down when the thread didn't help them find anyone.

People were also (understandably) mentioned as a match for anyone, or of they only got one match, while someone else was matched several times (this honestly happened because some members are more well-known and/or share more than others -- it was impossible to match people who hardly ever posted and/or never shared anything about themselves in their posts.)

That being said, would anyone still be interested? I know it probably seems like a killjoy to bring up all the problems before the attempt is even made, but I'm hoping against hope that we could still have fun and yet avoid any major disasters!

Thoughts, suggestions, and solutions are welcome. :)


Just to get an idea of how many might be interested, I'm including a poll (which is anonymous and multiple choice,) but please don't let that be a substitute for sharing your thoughts here on the thread. The more we get smoothed out in advance, the better I think it might go.
I keep getting matched with myself...