Why am I single?

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If you're single, are you happy with your singleness?

  • Yes

    Votes: 11 61.1%

  • No

    Votes: 7 38.9%
  • Total voters
    18
F

frames

Guest
#62
#62
Marriages are first made in heaven.

Proof : PROVERBS 19:14

Houses and riches are an inheritance from fathers, but a prudent wife is - - -
FROM THE LORD : )

The Lord decides all things, that is if you let him OR decide for yourself.

Better a prudent wife FROM THE LORD and waiting,
than for a wife by your own judgement or understanding.

There are reasons for the wait --- When man was made, eve was not there with adam as with the other creatures,
he has to wait - God has good reasons for this - and Adam saw Eve and he loved God's work.

God always have reasons for everything, whether we understand it - or not [hope this helps]
 
S

Sofia

Guest
#63
#63
I'd advise you all to read 'when God writes your love story' by Eric and Leslie Ludy. I haven't finished it yet but what I've read so far is BRILLIANT. It speaks of focusing on God, building your life around him instead of 'build him in'. When the time is right, when you are ready, God will send the right person for you your way. I'm very much single myself and has always been. I trust God to show me what and who is right for me. I don't want to randomly date, and all that - I'm waiting (quite impatiently at times!) for Him to show me "Mr. Right" - as cheesy as that might sound. To me it's so incredibly important to find a godly guy, a good Christian guy.. and I'm sure a lot of girls here and out there agree! We don't want a guy who has dated around like crazy. Well, at least I don't want to be one of many before. I'm keeping my heart for that One who God one day will send down my path! :)

Make Him no.1 and He will teach you to be that person you're meant to be and sooner or later He will show you love. Embrace being single, grow in your relationship with our Lord. There are sooo many things I want to type down here but I can't quite get it out right in English. HOWEVER, DO READ THE BOOK! It's a book for both girls and boys. Men and women, if you so prefer ;) No honestly, great book. Great, great book. I'm gonna stop being such a cheesy cheese now :D

"Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart." :D
 
B

Baptistrw

Guest
#64
#64
Sofia said:
I'd advise you all to read 'when God writes your love story' by Eric and Leslie Ludy. I haven't finished it yet but what I've read so far is BRILLIANT. It speaks of focusing on God, building your life around him instead of 'build him in'. When the time is right, when you are ready, God will send the right person for you your way. I'm very much single myself and has always been. I trust God to show me what and who is right for me. I don't want to randomly date, and all that - I'm waiting (quite impatiently at times!) for Him to show me "Mr. Right" - as cheesy as that might sound. To me it's so incredibly important to find a godly guy, a good Christian guy.. and I'm sure a lot of girls here and out there agree! We don't want a guy who has dated around like crazy. Well, at least I don't want to be one of many before. I'm keeping my heart for that One who God one day will send down my path! :)

Make Him no.1 and He will teach you to be that person you're meant to be and sooner or later He will show you love. Embrace being single, grow in your relationship with our Lord. There are sooo many things I want to type down here but I can't quite get it out right in English. HOWEVER, DO READ THE BOOK! It's a book for both girls and boys. Men and women, if you so prefer ;) No honestly, great book. Great, great book. I'm gonna stop being such a cheesy cheese now :D

"Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart." :D
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Amen, thanks for your input. :)
 
K

Kenoragirl

Guest
#65
#65
I agree Raymond!! totally. It is soooo important (and attractive), when a guy has goals & his eyes are set on God.
 
PANCAKES

PANCAKES

Senior Member
#66
Apr 26, 2009
451
14
18
#66
SamIam said:
OHH OHH I KNOW WHY IM SINGLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i think it has something to do with that fact that im not a law abiding citizen..................
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LOL! I'm right there with ya'
 
M

MusicalMe

Guest
#67
#67
It's funny how everyone is pretty much agreeing with the original post, and yet the poll reflects that the majority are unhappily single!

(Although my "yes" answer could just have easily been a "no" if I had been having one of my lonely days at the time... or if I hadn't just talked to my ex bf on the phone, reminding me why I'm SO GLAD to not be with him anymore...)
 
L

luke15chick

Guest
#68
#68
I think it's one thing to be unhappy that one is single and deal with that burden privately and another to be unhappy that one is single and to broadcast it as well as chasing any available person of the opposite sex. The latter is what baptist is addressing and to that I think people are agreeing with.
 
M

MusicalMe

Guest
#69
#69
luke15chick said:
I think it's one thing to be unhappy that one is single and deal with that burden privately and another to be unhappy that one is single and to broadcast it as well as chasing any available person of the opposite sex. The latter is what baptist is addressing and to that I think people are agreeing with.
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That makes sense. Good point.
 
P

pinkstix56

Guest
#70
#70
AMEN! Finally maybe most of these guys can get it in their heads , from listening to you.
 
L

luke15chick

Guest
#71
#71
one can only hope, but on the other hand some of them provide great comic relief for me
 
J

Jennifleur

Guest
#72
#72
Kenoragirl said:
I agree Raymond!! totally. It is soooo important (and attractive), when a guy has goals & his eyes are set on God.
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Absolutely. This was the point I was trying to make in another post, that I wasn't able to get across. Faith in God is the most important thing, but we also want to see that a guy has goals. Having goals means that you realize you have something of value to offer the world, and that is very attractive, even if you still live at home now. (Hey, I still live at home, nothing wrong with that, as long as you're working toward something). ;)
 
L

Laiahna

Guest
#74
#74
Not bad for a Baptist. ;) Most gals are more interested in guys that befriend them then the ones whining.
 
M

magatha2116

Guest
#75
#75
Yes I so agree.... you should write a book... and the boys need to stop with the oh wow is my stories about being single.... it is such a turn off
 
E

eby

Guest
#76
#76
No personal holiness. If you have your heart set on all the things the world loves, worldly music, wicked movies, etc, do you think you impress a Godly girl?
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Why should such person try to impress a Christian girl ?

No vision. Girls want to see a man with goals who is actively seeking to make them happen. Sitting on the couch playing Playstation games or on the internet playing computer games all day is not acceptable.
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Agreed, but you won't find any Christian in that situation.

We should desire to do God’s will and seek him in planning, but none of us know what tomorrow will bring, but if the Lord gives us a tomorrow, we should have a definite approach.

You don’t have to be insanely good looking or some freakish athlete. Be yourself.
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Amen for that.

No evidence of a Christian walk. If you don’t pray, or read your Bible, or go to church faithfully, then you probably shouldn’t date.
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Wrong, Relationship with God is very private and personal. Read Matthew 6: 5-6.

I know many people who doesn't seem doing the things you've mentioned, but they're Christian by their walk.

Holiness is "denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world." We are the light of the world and we simply cannot do this without mingling with non-christians(not in their sinful ways).
 
P

powerchick

Guest
#77
#77
I'm 23 and single b/c no guy has ever asked me out. O well, I'm not complaining
 
R

Remmy

Guest
#78
#78
Baptistrw said:
I’ve noticed there’s a trend here of guys who are single and constantly saying how sad it is they don’t have a girlfriend and saying it often. I want to say that if they spent as much time working on their relationships with God as they did worrying about finding a girl, they’d have good Christian ladies lining up to be with them. Most of the guys I see doing this are 18-25 with few exceptions. I’m obviously not a girl but I can understand why girls are chased away from guys in our age group (since I am also in that age group being 23) since I have talked to several about this very topic. So here are the reasons I think many guys are single:


  • No personal holiness. If you have your heart set on all the things the world loves, worldly music, wicked movies, etc, do you think you impress a Godly girl?
  • No vision. Girls want to see a man with goals who is actively seeking to make them happen. Sitting on the couch playing Playstation games or on the internet playing computer games all day is not acceptable. Girls want men who can lead them, and provide for them, not just materially, but spiritually and mentally. That doesn’t mean you have to have life all figured out. We should desire to do God’s will and seek him in planning, but none of us know what tomorrow will bring, but if the Lord gives us a tomorrow, we should have a definite approach.
  • No confidence. Girls don’t want to hear you complain about all the things that are wrong with you. You don’t have to be insanely good looking or some freakish athlete. Be yourself. We all have flaws. Its ok, we’re all human and have areas to work on.
  • No evidence of a Christian walk. If you don’t pray, or read your Bible, or go to church faithfully, then you probably shouldn’t date. If a prospective spouse can’t see the evidences of God working in your life, you should work on getting yourself right before trying to influence someone else. The way to develop those evidences is to seek God in the previously named areas.
  • No ability to lead. The way to see if someone is a leader is to see if anyone is following. Do people follow you? Are there people who would consider you to be a spiritual role model? Are you actively trying to stand out for Christ or blend in? There should be evidences of spiritual leadership present before someone tries to lead a prospective spouse. Many times in a relationship the guy isn’t ready to lead, so the lady is forced to leave her position of support to lead because the guy isn’t ready which causes major problems in marriages down the road.
So my cure for these issues is quit worrying so much about finding as you should on becoming. In order to find the right person you must be the right person. So focus on Christ and let Him have the priority in your life over having a girlfriend.
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amen sister!
you said it all!..i should it forward to some of my male friends..lol
 
T

TurquoiseLady

Guest
#79
#79
Yes ~ I agree too....Thanks for adding this, it is very inspirational. I am a single 36 year old woman and I feel very happy and secure being single, I would love to have a Real man in my life one day but it seems the majority of men are Exactly as you have discribed and I feel like it would be settling by picking one of these types of guys to try to build anything with. I will pray about this and make room for someone to come into my heart one day, I've been filling it with much work and personal goals so it is my fault too on why I am single, but it is by choice and I figure if there aren't any good choices out there might as well stay busy so I don't get lonely....Well enough venting...hahaha...I know someone out there can relate to this...
Thanks Again ~TL
 
J

Jordan9

Guest
#80
#80
Baptistrw said:
I’ve noticed there’s a trend here of guys who are single and constantly saying how sad it is they don’t have a girlfriend and saying it often. I want to say that if they spent as much time working on their relationships with God as they did worrying about finding a girl, they’d have good Christian ladies lining up to be with them. Most of the guys I see doing this are 18-25 with few exceptions. I’m obviously not a girl but I can understand why girls are chased away from guys in our age group (since I am also in that age group being 23) since I have talked to several about this very topic. So here are the reasons I think many guys are single:


  • No personal holiness. If you have your heart set on all the things the world loves, worldly music, wicked movies, etc, do you think you impress a Godly girl?
  • No vision. Girls want to see a man with goals who is actively seeking to make them happen. Sitting on the couch playing Playstation games or on the internet playing computer games all day is not acceptable. Girls want men who can lead them, and provide for them, not just materially, but spiritually and mentally. That doesn’t mean you have to have life all figured out. We should desire to do God’s will and seek him in planning, but none of us know what tomorrow will bring, but if the Lord gives us a tomorrow, we should have a definite approach.
  • No confidence. Girls don’t want to hear you complain about all the things that are wrong with you. You don’t have to be insanely good looking or some freakish athlete. Be yourself. We all have flaws. Its ok, we’re all human and have areas to work on.
  • No evidence of a Christian walk. If you don’t pray, or read your Bible, or go to church faithfully, then you probably shouldn’t date. If a prospective spouse can’t see the evidences of God working in your life, you should work on getting yourself right before trying to influence someone else. The way to develop those evidences is to seek God in the previously named areas.
  • No ability to lead. The way to see if someone is a leader is to see if anyone is following. Do people follow you? Are there people who would consider you to be a spiritual role model? Are you actively trying to stand out for Christ or blend in? There should be evidences of spiritual leadership present before someone tries to lead a prospective spouse. Many times in a relationship the guy isn’t ready to lead, so the lady is forced to leave her position of support to lead because the guy isn’t ready which causes major problems in marriages down the road.

So my cure for these issues is quit worrying so much about finding as you should on becoming. In order to find the right person you must be the right person. So focus on Christ and let Him have the priority in your life over having a girlfriend.
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I've wanted to say this quite a few in my short stint on this site. Though I'm ashamed to confess that I often worded it less charitably in my head...

So thanks!
 
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