Why am I still single

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sam2k4

Guest
#21
i didnt say all i said most of them i have met!!!
 
C

christiancollegegirl

Guest
#22
Sometimes I hate being single, sometimes I don't mind. I've been single for over a year now, and I miss having someone there. I know of a few guys that are willing to fill that position, but none of them is right for me. I've decided that the next guy I date will be the one I marry, so I'm being very picky.

As far as dating non christians, DON"T DO IT!!! They'll only lead you astray.
 
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pinkstix56

Guest
#23
I think that for all of us who are still single, should just continue to pray to God about our spouse, and just thanking Him for pointing them out to you sooner than later. And asking him to prepare you to be the type of husband/ wife you need to be to that person. Remember we date because that person is a potential spouse ..not because it just something fun to do for a while.
 
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Maddog

Guest
#24
I've decided that the next guy I date will be the one I marry, so I'm being very picky.
I hope you don't tell him that. That's a sure fire way to send him running in the opposite direction.
 
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christiancollegegirl

Guest
#26
I hope you don't tell him that. That's a sure fire way to send him running in the opposite direction.
Thats one little detail I'm holding back till the third date.
 
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Not_The_Righteous

Guest
#27
Aside from the biblical command not to be unequally yoked, dating someone who doesn't share your fundamental beliefs or worldview is usually a recipe for hurt, compromise, and a lot more trouble than sitting at home on the weekends.

If you'll forgive the pun, a Christian dating a non-Christian knowingly is courting disaster. There are worse things than being single waiting for the right person.
 
V

vince

Guest
#28
life is constantly learning new things. Change your thinking and you will change your outcome. Learn from those who are successful, but don't wonder away from the lord in doing it. Get IT. You have a situation. You can't change your situation with the same mind frame that got you in the situation in the first. I hope this help. Best luck to you. You look like a great guy, maybe you just lack marketing skills. : ).
 
Nov 2, 2009
53
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#29
Being single sux. I'm sorry - but i believe God made us relational people and i'm not liking being single at all. In saying that I am content in this season to be single and to go throuh the journey with God (but am very open to a relationship to start!).
I do believe Christian girls are messed up. I also believe that non christian girls are messed up as are christian and non christian males. Truth is we are all messed up and in need of our saviour.
I do also agree when you say that being desperate is unattractive! hehe it's sooo true :)
I take comfort in knowing that God is a good God and knows the desires of my heart, but that He is still God and I pray for His will to be done in my life.
Hope that somewhat helps... ?
 

QuestionTime

Senior Member
Feb 16, 2010
1,435
20
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#30
The obvious answer is you're still single because you haven't got a girlfriend.

But assuming it's not a trick question, my advice would be to say rubbish to the lot of them. Just stay single and be contented with that. The irony is of course, that as soon as you're comfortable just being single, you'll immediately become more attractive to the opposite sex.
Maddog is correct. The more desperate you appear, the further away the women will be. Stop caring and they will come around quickly.

Quest
 
L

little

Guest
#31
Well, as a Christian Woman (Godwilling), I believe God has taught me that he will give you the desires of your heart, as Long as he is truly number ONE. If we let our thought dictate about feeling sorry, or depressed for the state of singleness, instead as seeing the great personal realitionship that the Lord is trying to experince with us,we will never get filled up on his perfect and unfailing Love. I am still learning this, and can only conclude this by my own experinces. God bless.
 
Feb 18, 2010
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#32
The obvious answer is you're still single because you haven't got a girlfriend.

But assuming it's not a trick question, my advice would be to say rubbish to the lot of them. Just stay single and be contented with that. The irony is of course, that as soon as you're comfortable just being single, you'll immediately become more attractive to the opposite sex.
Yeah. Pretty much, Maddog. In high school I had 3-4 girls after me and only ever thought about doing something about one of them... which I never went through with. Too many girls these days it seems want the I'm-too-independent-and-cool-for-you kind of guy. Maybe ignoring their every advance makes the guy look strong, independent and cool-headed. I don't know. Honestly, I don't even know why I ignored them. High school was a strange time for me. So I don't exactly know what to do there, but one thing you can bet against is the I'm-needy-and-clingy approach. Girls who try that approach could come off as 'cute' to me, but any guy that tries that on a girl is going to come off as a creep. The door doesn't swing both ways through the genders.

And, yeah, a lot of Christian girls can be really messed up. Heck, a lot of girls in general can be these days. Keep your eyes open and try, but don't get snagged on one girl before you date. A lot of girls like to get to know a guy as a friend first. Being genuinely friendly makes them happy. Treat them like respectable people, but don't treat them like queens or goddesses. If you approach them as a friend then even if the relationship doesn't bloom you'll still end up with a friend. :)
 
Feb 18, 2010
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#33
I hope you don't tell him that. That's a sure fire way to send him running in the opposite direction.
LOL I think if some girl told me this on a first date I could handle it and might pass it off as a slip-up. As long as she was a great person I'd secretly want to marry her, too. That's what it's all about. But, yeah, if she said it repeatedly then it would make me uncomfortable.
 
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Matthew

Guest
#34
So here's the deal im 23 and everyone will tell me im still young which is one of the most annoying things you can say to me for the record. So ive been single for 3 years and every time i get close to a girl and think that something is gonna happen something happens and it all derails and we loose contact or she always decides that she isn't interested. I made a pact with myself and God that I wouldnt date a non christian because I dont feel that will help me but im seriously re considering that decision these days because most Christian Girls seem to be messed up!!
sam
so basically your all telling me to carry on waiting....
christian girls tend to play you around more and dont actually kno how to commnicate!!!
It's all a state of mind, 3 years will seem a long while and the repetitious advice will be annoying if you continously focus on wanting a girlfriend, the frustration is something only you can deal with and as annoying as it might be the passage of time is one of the things that will help.

I am 26 and a few years ago it all seemed to be about getting a girlfriend, everything seemed to hinge on that, I'd be comfortable in groups, I'd have intimacy and I'd finally stop being seen like someone trapped between adolescence and adulthood by everyone around.

Many Christian girls seem messed up because they are careful with their hearts and rigthfully so, it is easy to become over-anylitical when you are a Christian but these girls, just like you, can't move on if it goes wrong happy to encounter the next guy and see how it goes, they know there is an emotional and spiritual price to pay and they are cautious, if you want the rewards that come from a relationship where your partner holds to that kind of standard you have to reconcile yourself to the fact that it could be a LOT more than 3 years before you find a woman you really connect with.

It doesn't help you and it doesn't help me, it helps no-one, but it's all about patience and in the time in-between try and focus on the things you do have that leave you feeling satisfied and the time may pass a little faster.
 
Feb 18, 2010
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#35
It's all a state of mind, 3 years will seem a long while and the repetitious advice will be annoying if you continously focus on wanting a girlfriend, the frustration is something only you can deal with and as annoying as it might be the passage of time is one of the things that will help.

I am 26 and a few years ago it all seemed to be about getting a girlfriend, everything seemed to hinge on that, I'd be comfortable in groups, I'd have intimacy and I'd finally stop being seen like someone trapped between adolescence and adulthood by everyone around.

Many Christian girls seem messed up because they are careful with their hearts and rigthfully so, it is easy to become over-anylitical when you are a Christian but these girls, just like you, can't move on if it goes wrong happy to encounter the next guy and see how it goes, they know there is an emotional and spiritual price to pay and they are cautious, if you want the rewards that come from a relationship where your partner holds to that kind of standard you have to reconcile yourself to the fact that it could be a LOT more than 3 years before you find a woman you really connect with.

It doesn't help you and it doesn't help me, it helps no-one, but it's all about patience and in the time in-between try and focus on the things you do have that leave you feeling satisfied and the time may pass a little faster.
Good advice, Matthew. I also love Babylon 5. ;)
 
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Matthew

Guest
#36
Good advice, Matthew. I also love Babylon 5. ;)
Thanks, it's good to know I'm not the only fan, people with good taste are harder and harder to find :D
 
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novy

Guest
#37
hi..how are you..
 
R

Redeemed

Guest
#38
Sam,
God is preparing someone amazing for you. You know this. and i know you know this because poeple have probably always told you this, as they have to me.
But im going to be blunt with you. If you aren't going to put your trust and patience into waiting for your Beloved, God isn't going to put them into your life until you are ready to be those things for her. Just focus on God. HE will last you. HE satisfies you. HE gives you pleasure.HE will make you prosperous.and it is only becuase of HIM, we can be thankful for the gift of marriage. And strengthening your relationship with the one true bridegroom and learning from HIM will show Him when you are ready to make that all-consuming, unbreakable bond of husband and wife.
I didn't write this t you in a spirit of condemnation, but God wanted me to reach out to my spiritual brother and tell you what he He has told me.
God bless, and i DO pray with all of my heart that you find happiness.

love in Christ, your sister- Redeemed
 
Jan 13, 2010
98
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0
#40
So here's the deal im 23 and everyone will tell me im still young which is one of the most annoying things you can say to me for the record. So ive been single for 3 years and every time i get close to a girl and think that something is gonna happen something happens and it all derails and we loose contact or she always decides that she isn't interested. I made a pact with myself and God that I wouldnt date a non christian because I dont feel that will help me but im seriously re considering that decision these days because most Christian Girls seem to be messed up!!
sam
when you are seeing a girl do you ask her about her past what she likes,dislikes,is she more interested in herself or is she interested in you? then you go back to her past and you'll find out how she will treat you,because her past will dictate her future. she can't help it because it is human nature to go with what you know. we all do this,so when you start seeing someone find out her interest in you and then find out about her past. if she is secretive then get as far away as possible from her because this one will lie to you in every way possible. then check to see if she is direct with you.does she go a long way to explain a yes or no answer? or is she clear to you? because you see us men in general are clueless about the way women think or speak so don't be afraid to ask her direct questions and be clear to her that you do know what she is saying when she is speaking.