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Two atoms bump into each other. "Oh my goodness! I think I just lost an electron!" says one of them. They other one looks concerned "Are you sure?" it asks. "Oh, yes" says the first. "I'm positive!"
Am I breaking the rules? I guess this isn't really a "kiddie" joke, being about chemistry and all....
Am I breaking the rules? I guess this isn't really a "kiddie" joke, being about chemistry and all....
C
If this is wrong please comment
ok....
There was a boy and a teacher, and the boy said may i go to the bathroom and the teacher said, I want u to say the alphabet and then u can go. and the boy sighed with displeasure and said, a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z. and then the teacher said where is "p", and the boy said, running down my leg!!!!
shalom
ok....
There was a boy and a teacher, and the boy said may i go to the bathroom and the teacher said, I want u to say the alphabet and then u can go. and the boy sighed with displeasure and said, a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z. and then the teacher said where is "p", and the boy said, running down my leg!!!!
shalom
B
This one is a bit beyond juvenile understanding and experience but I'm dying to share...
One morning, a man wakes up with his fishing gear all packed for a day at the river. He kisses his wife good-bye and walks with his gear out to the driveway; as he pulls out in his car it immediately starts raining buckets. He turns on the radio to the weather forecast, which predicts heavy showers all day. The man cuts his losses and pulls back up into the driveway. He goes back into his bedroom, climbs into bed and says to his wife, "Bad stuff out there, hey?"
His wife replies, half-asleep, "Can you believe my husband is out fishing in that crap..."
One morning, a man wakes up with his fishing gear all packed for a day at the river. He kisses his wife good-bye and walks with his gear out to the driveway; as he pulls out in his car it immediately starts raining buckets. He turns on the radio to the weather forecast, which predicts heavy showers all day. The man cuts his losses and pulls back up into the driveway. He goes back into his bedroom, climbs into bed and says to his wife, "Bad stuff out there, hey?"
His wife replies, half-asleep, "Can you believe my husband is out fishing in that crap..."
T
This was an actual announced message just before the plane takes off:
From a Southwest Airlines employee.... "Welcome aboard Southwest Flight XXX to YYY. To operate your seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt, and if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised. In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with two small children, decide now which one you love more.
From a Southwest Airlines employee.... "Welcome aboard Southwest Flight XXX to YYY. To operate your seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt, and if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised. In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with two small children, decide now which one you love more.
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I'm glad you started this thread, Germex. It's been fun!
This isn't a joke, but I probably would've laughed for an hour if I'd heard it when I was five. In the US when we want to say that something is easy, we say, "It's a piece of cake." In Germany, it's "You can do it with your left hand". The funny one is that in France, I understand it's "you can do it with your fingers in your nose!"
This isn't a joke, but I probably would've laughed for an hour if I'd heard it when I was five. In the US when we want to say that something is easy, we say, "It's a piece of cake." In Germany, it's "You can do it with your left hand". The funny one is that in France, I understand it's "you can do it with your fingers in your nose!"