Do You Feel Like the Leftovers?

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seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#1
May 23, 2009
16,442
5,391
113
#1
Hey everyone,

Have you ever found yourself in this situation? I usually find that I become friends with guys pretty easily... but when it comes to dating, guys will approach me... because they want to date one of my friends.

It happens less often as I get older because almost all my friends are now married/engaged/have children.

Once a guy finds this out, he'll kind of be like... "Well... I guess I could date you... you're still single, right?"

Gee, how flattering.

I can barely contain my swooning. (NOT.)

How about all of you? Does this happen to you too, and how do you handle it?
 
Kakashi

Kakashi

Senior Member
#2
Jan 3, 2007
626
2
0
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#2
This has never happened to me, but i can saftly say I wouldn't approve of it and would just drop it if they treat me liek that.

To sum up : i wanna be the main course, not the leftovers! haha
 
grace

grace

Senior Member
#3
Sep 8, 2006
1,064
11
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#3
Well, seoulsearch.....it could be worse. The other day in chat....someone (and I will not mention who because I am sure they did not mean it like this).....said;

*Grace is very pretty, but she is older than me, and she has children.* :O Like my age is a handicap and my children are extra appendages or something! lol That made me feel reeaaaaallllll great! lol

I think you have a much better shot of meeting someone than I do seoulsearch...lol
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#4
May 23, 2009
16,442
5,391
113
#4
Hey guys,

You made me laugh!

Kakashi--you are right on--I think we all want to be the specialty entree, not the green beans (no offense to anyone who likes green beans :) ).

Grace--I'm so sorry guys have said that!! You and your children are beautiful!

It's kind of funny about being "older"--I work with a wide age range of people--one of the younger guys thought I was about 25 so he "helpfully" told one of his friends, "Hey, Kimmie over here needs a boyfriend." Then they found out I was 35... and it didn't stop this guy's friend. He walked right up to me and said, "Well, I like older women. Plus, I'll have you know, I'm 18, and that's LEGAL, AND, I'll be 19 next month."

Oh my gosh, it took all I could do not to burst out LAUGHING. He was so confident, totally undaunted, as if it didn't even phase him... it was almost cute. I just told him... that was way, way too much of an age gap (beside, I don't want have to ask anyone's mother if I can take him out!)

It was kind of flattering but I was pretty shocked.

Don't give up, y'all! We're all in this together.
 
K

Kyra

Guest
#5
#5
Seoulsearch I burst out laughing when I read your last post!! I had to get on and say that is hilarious!

It reminds me of a while back I was walking out of my church and these two young guys(teens) were standing in the church lawn. The one kid gave me this smile and said "hi" and the other kid hit him and whispered,"DUDE she's like 20!!"


 
H

Hethr

Guest
#6
#6
This incident sums my dating life up. I'm at dinner with my gorgeous married friend. Men are always hitting on her. I am not gorgeous. Men do not hit on me.. which I actually appreciate. This guy comes up to our table, he had seen my friend before and was saying hi. Was also hitting on her. She mentioned she is married and he asks if she knows any single women. She cheerfully volunteers that I am single, to which I shoot her darts with my eyes. He looks at me, looks back at her and carries on the conversation like I wasn't even there. Yeah.. snub city! However I was grateful, he was not an attractive man.
 
J0Y

J0Y

Senior Member
#7
Mar 7, 2009
509
6
18
#7
Yeah, I have a friend who is separated and she is thin and pretty, so, yeah, she gets the looks and attention from males.....

BUT, to be honest....if a guy is THAT shallow that he cant see beyond the exterior, is he worth it at all? I say NO WAY!

Also, this girl I hang out with is the ONLY single girl friend I have. ALL the other girls I have anything to do with from Church are all married with kids....so its hang out with her and be the 'spare wheel' or hang out with a bunch of married's talking bout babies, toilet training and husbands!!! (none of which I have ever experienced)!

So, yeah.....can be a bit isolating when you get to 35 and realise that ALL your close friends are in a TOTALLY different life space to you and commonality pretty much goes out the door..... Its either pretend your interested in what size clothes their kid has just grown out of, or,hang out on your own, or, hang out with that pretty skinny newly single girl who gets all the attention!! HAHAHA.....gotta laugh really.......and yes, I am moving next year, hopefully to a city where there are other 30 somethings who are actually still single!!
 
R

Rissa77

Guest
#8
#8
Ugh. Men.

I have a feeling I'll be like you two, Kyra and Seoulsearch. People say I look 12 now. The curve may continue. lol

Let's see. One time I met the guy first, he was interested in me first, saw my friend, dated her, than wanted to date me.
Another guy who I liked didn't want me. He wanted her. lol
Another guy considered her, then she dated his friend. He saw me, and then wanted to date me.
Others don't even consider me an option next to her. lol

But I am thankful I don't get hit on as badly as she does. :D
 
K

Kyra

Guest
#9
#9
...so its hang out with her and be the 'spare wheel' or hang out with a bunch of married's talking bout babies, toilet training and husbands!!! (none of which I have ever experienced)!

C'mon joy admit it projectile vomit and baby poo are lovely dinner topics!


p.s. Rissa that's actually a good curve to have, just wait til you hit 50. :D
 
J0Y

J0Y

Senior Member
#10
Mar 7, 2009
509
6
18
#10
Kyra said:
...so its hang out with her and be the 'spare wheel' or hang out with a bunch of married's talking bout babies, toilet training and husbands!!! (none of which I have ever experienced)!

C'mon joy admit it projectile vomit and baby poo are lovely dinner topics!


Ummmmm yeah right Kyra..........

Oh and I also get told I look about 27....this makes me :) until I see their face drop when I say my actual age! :( LOL LOL
Click to expand...
 
M

Meridoc

Guest
#11
#11
seoulsearch said:
Hey everyone,

Have you ever found yourself in this situation? I usually find that I become friends with guys pretty easily... but when it comes to dating, guys will approach me... because they want to date one of my friends.

It happens less often as I get older because almost all my friends are now married/engaged/have children.

Once a guy finds this out, he'll kind of be like... "Well... I guess I could date you... you're still single, right?"

Gee, how flattering.

I can barely contain my swooning. (NOT.)

How about all of you? Does this happen to you too, and how do you handle it?
Click to expand...
Ok first I would like to apologize on behalf of all the NON-brain dead guys, it total knobs like that who give the rest of us a harder time with the female half of the species.
 
H

Hethr

Guest
#12
#12
Wow, yeah I look way younger than I am. If one more person calls me honey or gets shocked when I tell them my age.. GRR, it gets so old.
 
C

chelsers

Guest
#13
#13
I look older than I am, but my mom did when she was my age and now she looks much younger than she is. It's a good deal! :)
 
M

Meridoc

Guest
#14
#14
the age I look depends on the amount of facial hair I am sporting :p I have gotten guessed from early to mid 20s to mid 30s
 
Sharp

Sharp

Senior Member
#15
May 5, 2009
2,568
20
38
#15
I was inspecting this house once, and this asian girl answered the door. I thought she was about 12. I asked her if her parents were home, as I needed to speak to the owners of the house. She advised me that she was 34 and she owned the house. I was sooooo embarassed hahaha, but I couldn't believe it!!!

No offence to asians, but its really hard to tell how old asian people are sometimes! I might post this in the 'blonde moments' thread...
 
I

iraasuup

Guest
#16
#16
HAHAHA luke! That's hysterical!
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#17
May 23, 2009
16,442
5,391
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#17
Sharp said:
I was inspecting this house once, and this asian girl answered the door. I thought she was about 12. I asked her if her parents were home, as I needed to speak to the owners of the house. She advised me that she was 34 and she owned the house. I was sooooo embarassed hahaha, but I couldn't believe it!!!

No offence to asians, but its really hard to tell how old asian people are sometimes! I might post this in the 'blonde moments' thread...
Click to expand...

LUKE!!! GET AWAY FROM MY HOUSE!!! So okay... I don't look 12... but people usually think I'm in my early to mid-twenties.

I've been loving everyone's posts here--am glad to know I'm not the only one.

I've told this story before (nods to Kyra)--a guy at work (he's about 18) asked me if I had a boyfriend and when I said no, he called out to one of his friends and said, "Hey Josh, Kimmie over here needs a boyfriend!!"

I was horrified. And they were even more horrified when they discovered my age--"OH MY GOSH, WE THOUGHT YOU WERE LIKE 23!!!"

But this guy Josh wasn't about to be discouraged, I guess... he walked up to me and said, "I'll have you know, I'm 18--and that's legal... AND I'll be 19 next month."

GOOD GRIEF!!!

(To this day... he's a whopping 20 now... Josh still tries to invite me to "go hang out" [read: drunken beach parties] with him and his friends.) Um, no thanks.

Please God, tell me you still have some nice, single, Christian guys out there around my age!! ;)
 
Silex

Silex

Member
#18
Jul 23, 2009
78
2
8
#18
Leftovers???? Why that's appalling. No one should feel like leftovers...

On the other hand, perhaps think of it as marinating.
 
C

christiancollegegirl

Guest
#19
#19
My guy friends often ask me if I have any single friends and are dissapointed when I say no. It's like I'm good enough to be a friend, but not good eough to date. It's kind of ok, though because I wouldn't date these guys either. I just don't see them that way.
Most guys think I'm between 16- 18. There was one man in his 40's? who thought I was 14, and he was hitting on me anyway!! Ewwww!!!! Why, oh why can't I get hit on by an attractive guy my age???
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#20
May 23, 2009
16,442
5,391
113
#20
Silex said:
Leftovers???? Why that's appalling. No one should feel like leftovers...

On the other hand, perhaps think of it as marinating.
Click to expand...

That's an interesting point, Silex... marinating... like in a fountain of Italian dressing? Hmm. I've been to Italy but have never had the opportunity to date an Italian.

Maybe someday. :) Just kidding! We'll see what God has planned.
 
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