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I loved When You Let God Write Your Love Story. 
The Ludy's are great authors.
Here is a blog I wrote regarding my belief that God does, in fact, have a specific person designed to marry a specific person, should marriage be in His will: One For One | Hephzibah
As for preparing, I believe that God does lead all of us on a journey of learning what it means to be married, because so much of the wisdom needed to be a husband or wife is applicable in every day life as a Christian.
The Ludy's are great authors. Here is a blog I wrote regarding my belief that God does, in fact, have a specific person designed to marry a specific person, should marriage be in His will: One For One | Hephzibah
As for preparing, I believe that God does lead all of us on a journey of learning what it means to be married, because so much of the wisdom needed to be a husband or wife is applicable in every day life as a Christian.
S
I loved When You Let God Write Your Love Story. The Ludy's are great authors.
Here is a blog I wrote regarding my belief that God does, in fact, have a specific person designed to marry a specific person, should marriage be in His will: One For One | Hephzibah
As for preparing, I believe that God does lead all of us on a journey of learning what it means to be married, because so much of the wisdom needed to be a husband or wife is applicable in every day life as a Christian.
The Ludy's are great authors. Here is a blog I wrote regarding my belief that God does, in fact, have a specific person designed to marry a specific person, should marriage be in His will: One For One | Hephzibah
As for preparing, I believe that God does lead all of us on a journey of learning what it means to be married, because so much of the wisdom needed to be a husband or wife is applicable in every day life as a Christian.
What of them? If they marry again, they marry again. I believe that God has a specific person in mind for each person. Marrying the one that He doesn't have in mind, or marrying again should you have already married who He had for you or not the one He had for you, isn't a sin. Look at Ruth. She married Naomi's son and ultimately was blessed to marry Boaz. Was Boaz the one that God had for her from the beginning? Could be. Or, was it Naomi's son all along, so that Ruth could usher in the kinsman redeemer for Naomi? Could be. I don't pretend to know the mind of God. I do, however, know that He has a specific plan and will for each of us. Why would we assume that He just leaves who we marry up to chance? If He is so attentive to us, as attentive as we believe He is, why would we assume that He says, "Well, when it comes to marriage, I don't have anyone specific in mind for you. We'll just see who you meet and like and go from there."
I don't pretend to know the mind of God. I do, however, know that He has a specific plan and will for each of us. Why would we assume that He just leaves who we marry up to chance? If He is so attentive to us, as attentive as we believe He is, why would we assume that He says, "Well, when it comes to marriage, I don't have anyone specific in mind for you. We'll just see who you meet and like and go from there."
S
What of them? If they marry again, they marry again. I believe that God has a specific person in mind for each person. Marrying the one that He doesn't have in mind, or marrying again should you have already married who He had for you or not the one He had for you, isn't a sin. Look at Ruth. She married Naomi's son and ultimately was blessed to marry Boaz. Was Boaz the one that God had for her from the beginning? Could be. Or, was it Naomi's son all along, so that Ruth could usher in the kinsman redeemer for Naomi? Could be. I don't pretend to know the mind of God. I do, however, know that He has a specific plan and will for each of us. Why would we assume that He just leaves who we marry up to chance? If He is so attentive to us, as attentive as we believe He is, why would we assume that He says, "Well, when it comes to marriage, I don't have anyone specific in mind for you. We'll just see who you meet and like and go from there."
I don't pretend to know the mind of God. I do, however, know that He has a specific plan and will for each of us. Why would we assume that He just leaves who we marry up to chance? If He is so attentive to us, as attentive as we believe He is, why would we assume that He says, "Well, when it comes to marriage, I don't have anyone specific in mind for you. We'll just see who you meet and like and go from there."
Does God have TWO people in mind for some of us? ^_^
Well, I want to say no, because I think that opens the door for dissatisfied believers to divorce and marry someone else. But, I think that Ruth may be an example of God having two people in mind for Ruth: one being Naomi's son, the other being Boaz. But, as I said, I don't know the mind of God. Maybe, in some rare cases, He does, in fact, have two people in mind for someone...or, maybe we just choose our own way and marry many times for whatever reason. It is hard to say.
I firmly believe that He has one person in mind for each believer. Could Ruth and Boaz have been together if she hadn't married Naomi's son? Maybe. But, would Boaz have been the kinsman redeemer for Naomi if Ruth wasn't her daughter-in-law? Nope. I will have to pray about that one. As for today, I believe God has one person in mind for those that He has marriage for. I explain in my blog that if one chooses to marry someone else, then that person becomes the one for them, that God, from then on, views them as 'meant to be' and uses them. Sometimes, this complicates the ability to do as God has called them to do, but does not make it impossible. God will still use them and they can still do His will and call and plan and purpose for their lives.
I don't believe it is a sin for someone divorced or widowed to marry later in life. I know what the NT says, so I don't want others throwing Bible verses at me. Notice how I said "I don't believe", I didn't say that God said anything to me in regards to this. I think it is wrong to divorce with the mindset that you can remarry because you're unhappy in your marriage and think he/she isn't 'the one'. If divorce happens for other reasons, such as affairs, abuse, dangerous drug use, child molestation, etc., I don't believe God condemns the person who marries someone else.
Sorry...I'm drifting. I don't believe that God has more than one person for someone. I believe He has one person specifically in mind for someone. Now, that begs the question, who did God have in mind for Ruth? I don't know the answer to that. She may be one of the exceptions. But, I'd have to ask Him.
But, I think that Ruth may be an example of God having two people in mind for Ruth: one being Naomi's son, the other being Boaz. But, as I said, I don't know the mind of God. Maybe, in some rare cases, He does, in fact, have two people in mind for someone...or, maybe we just choose our own way and marry many times for whatever reason. It is hard to say.I firmly believe that He has one person in mind for each believer. Could Ruth and Boaz have been together if she hadn't married Naomi's son? Maybe. But, would Boaz have been the kinsman redeemer for Naomi if Ruth wasn't her daughter-in-law? Nope. I will have to pray about that one.
As for today, I believe God has one person in mind for those that He has marriage for. I explain in my blog that if one chooses to marry someone else, then that person becomes the one for them, that God, from then on, views them as 'meant to be' and uses them. Sometimes, this complicates the ability to do as God has called them to do, but does not make it impossible. God will still use them and they can still do His will and call and plan and purpose for their lives.I don't believe it is a sin for someone divorced or widowed to marry later in life. I know what the NT says, so I don't want others throwing Bible verses at me.
Notice how I said "I don't believe", I didn't say that God said anything to me in regards to this. I think it is wrong to divorce with the mindset that you can remarry because you're unhappy in your marriage and think he/she isn't 'the one'. If divorce happens for other reasons, such as affairs, abuse, dangerous drug use, child molestation, etc., I don't believe God condemns the person who marries someone else.Sorry...I'm drifting. I don't believe that God has more than one person for someone. I believe He has one person specifically in mind for someone. Now, that begs the question, who did God have in mind for Ruth? I don't know the answer to that. She may be one of the exceptions. But, I'd have to ask Him.
J
If any other young widows are reading this, please read 1 Timothy 5. Not only is remarrying NOT a sin, 1 Timothy 5 makes it VERY clear that young widows CAN and SHOULD remarry.
Please do not be discouraged by previous posts. God does indeed have a plan for us and I don't believe for a moment that scripture would encourage us to remarry, but reconcile us to loveless miserable marriages. That's not the God I know.
P.S. - Please post prayerfully folks. Some people reading these forums have lost something VERY precious. Don't steal their hope too. God's watching.
Please do not be discouraged by previous posts. God does indeed have a plan for us and I don't believe for a moment that scripture would encourage us to remarry, but reconcile us to loveless miserable marriages. That's not the God I know.
P.S. - Please post prayerfully folks. Some people reading these forums have lost something VERY precious. Don't steal their hope too. God's watching.
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I specifically said that I don't believe it's a sin for people to remarry. I don't believe that widows and divorced people are of any less value than others, either. I just didn't want people throwing the 'those that remarry are fornicator' scriptures at me. I firmly and completely believe it's okay to remarry and that God blesses such things. The question I was addressing was the thought of God having a specific person in mind for a specific person, which I believe in, so they were asking if I believed God had two specific persons in mind for one person, which is why I mentioned Ruth, but I don't believe that He does have two specific somebodies for a single somebody, but that DOES NOT make it wrong for someone to remarry.
I believe with any marriage, be it the first or the second or third or whatever, that it is firmly a heart and motives issue. If folks are marrying over and over again for the wrong reasons, they will never be satisfied. Yet, if they are genuinely focused on Christ and His will and purpose, then they will find satisfaction, whatever reason for the divorce. Widows are a completely different ball of wax.
I just didn't want people throwing the 'those that remarry are fornicator' scriptures at me. I firmly and completely believe it's okay to remarry and that God blesses such things. The question I was addressing was the thought of God having a specific person in mind for a specific person, which I believe in, so they were asking if I believed God had two specific persons in mind for one person, which is why I mentioned Ruth, but I don't believe that He does have two specific somebodies for a single somebody, but that DOES NOT make it wrong for someone to remarry. I believe with any marriage, be it the first or the second or third or whatever, that it is firmly a heart and motives issue. If folks are marrying over and over again for the wrong reasons, they will never be satisfied. Yet, if they are genuinely focused on Christ and His will and purpose, then they will find satisfaction, whatever reason for the divorce. Widows are a completely different ball of wax.
J
The question I was addressing was the thought of God having a specific person in mind for a specific person, which I believe in, so they were asking if I believed God had two specific persons in mind for one person, which is why I mentioned Ruth, but I don't believe that He does have two specific somebodies for a single somebody, but that DOES NOT make it wrong for someone to remarry.
My point is that there may be young widows/widowers reading this who may have no idea that there is no scriptural support for the romantic notion that God has only one person in mind for everyone.
In the event a kinsman redeemer had never been married, yet had a scriptural obligation (Genesis 38; Deut 35; Matthew 22; Mark 12; Luke 20; etc.) to enter into marriage with a woman who had been married previously (such as Judah's youngest son/Er's baby brother, Shelah, having a scriptural obligation to marry Er's widow, Tamar), does that mean that the previously married lady is his "one and only"? If she is his "one and only", but he is not her "one and only", how does that theory hold up?
I happen to know for a fact that there are military widows on CC as young as 24 (perhaps younger) whose hearts are absolutely broken; who, once they have gone through a healing and grief process, are going to find themselves facing a life of loneliness and despair if they latch onto such a concept.
And, yes, they indeed are a whole other ball of wax to God. I can think of at least a handful of verses off of the top of my head dealing with His tender loving care and protection of them specifically, which is exactly why I am trying to protect them right now. Hurting one of them on top of the pain they have already undergone and stealing their hope is pretty serious stuff.
I thought that I was pretty clear in my post that I had no issues with someone marrying again. Sorry if I wasn't. The reason, however, that I believe that God does, in fact, have one specific person in mind for each person that He has marriage for, is because He has a specific plan and will for our lives and to believe that He would leave marriage up to chance, convenience and the feelings of the moment does not sound like Him. I explain all that in the blog post that I shared. If people read that, my posts make sense. If they don't read it, then my posts don't make sense. That's just the way it is.
And again I state that I don't believe it is a sin (or wrong or improper...pick whichever word you want). I just think that my posts were read with filters engaged and the point of the posts were missed, when I was careful each time to state that remarriage is not wrong. Just saying...and now I'm done.
It's not about the person you will (maybe) marry; it's about honoring your Savior. The Lord has a plan for all of us which may or may not include marriage. As believers, our end goal is to honor God, not to find a spouse. Let's faced it, even if you get married, it is only for a specific season of your life as the best marriages end after many years in death, others because of divorce. Other than Adam and Eve, you won't find the concept if being "made for each other" anywhere in the Bible. That's a romanticized notion popularized by the purity culture (which does promote many good things). Of course, seek God's guidance about when and who you marry, but that is only one facet of the person He created you to be.
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J
Whether remarriage for widows/widowers is/is not a sin (it's clearly not) is not the point of my posts either.
If there are young widows/widowers (or even those whose hearts are crushed from divorce) reading this thread, I hope they will understand what I'm talking about, even if those who have not walked in their shoes can't see it. In the midst of their grieving process, they will likely think, as most do, that their "one and only" is gone forever, that nothing/no one can ever take their place, and/or that they will never love again or find happiness in marriage with anyone else. They don't need to read that God's loving, godly marriage plan for them supposedly died in their 20s along with their spouse. That could not only damage their psyche, but their faith as well. My prayer is that this does not occur.
If there are young widows/widowers (or even those whose hearts are crushed from divorce) reading this thread, I hope they will understand what I'm talking about, even if those who have not walked in their shoes can't see it. In the midst of their grieving process, they will likely think, as most do, that their "one and only" is gone forever, that nothing/no one can ever take their place, and/or that they will never love again or find happiness in marriage with anyone else. They don't need to read that God's loving, godly marriage plan for them supposedly died in their 20s along with their spouse. That could not only damage their psyche, but their faith as well. My prayer is that this does not occur.
Elisabeth Elliot believed that her one true love, the one meant for her, died early in their marriage. I see nothing wrong with this belief. If someone finds love again, they find love again. If they don't, they don't. One doesn't have to marry, or marry again, to be whole, happy and satisfied or to do what God has called them to do. Did Elisabeth Elliot marry again? She sure did. But she knew that her 'one and only' was her first husband, Jim, and it didn't lessen her life at all to hold such a belief.
J
Elisabeth Elliot didn't write scripture. Her opinions regarding the matter do not solidify the "one and only" concept as a biblical one.
My purpose here is not to discuss abstract romantic notions, but rather prayerfully minister to those who could very well be damaged by some of the posts in this thread. Real people who have been through real pain. They don't need more.
My purpose here is not to discuss abstract romantic notions, but rather prayerfully minister to those who could very well be damaged by some of the posts in this thread. Real people who have been through real pain. They don't need more.