Do looks matter?

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Tandemtruths

Guest
#21
I suppose there always needs to be one. Thanks for taking time to reply to such a 'ridiculous' thread.
[video=youtube_share;sqcLjcSloXs]http://youtu.be/sqcLjcSloXs[/video]
 
Jan 28, 2010
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#22
you are silly tandem
 
F

flight316

Guest
#23
Sometimes looks matter and sometimes they don't. Looks seem to matter more to younger people because you think that you are good looking so you seem to think that you deserve someone that is good looking. Many people are shunned and sometimes hurt bacause of this mentality. Unfortunately looks don't last forever and neither does youth. Hopefully you won't get shunned when your looks start to fade. By the way I'm one of the few people who has always looked good even after 50 yrs. I have no control over it. Lol
 

my_adonai_

Senior Member
Mar 19, 2012
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#24
I remember the very first girl i actually had interest in, in my very immature self. we talked on a chat site, we had agreeing concepts, we went pvt chat, we spoke, exchanged numbers, continued talking and THEN decided to finally meet. i was basically fat then, and when we met the date did not take more than 5 minutes. The very first impression was my weight, why? well the next after next time we met the first thing she said "You have lost weight".

Hehe. I believe GOD is handsome, and The Glory of the FATHER in HIM makes HIM extraordinarily handsome, and i believe anyone that knows HIM and sees HIM will be like "WOW". But when was this? well after His death and resurrection we see the Awesome beauty of the Fathers Glory in Him

But while on earth how was he?

Isa 53:2 For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him.
Isa 53:3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
Isa 53:4 Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.

Jesus was not Bradd Pitt while on earth on any HOT GUY that the world or many ladies classify them as. He was a man without form or comliness, and NO Beauty that ANY SHOULD DESIRE HIM. ie He did have the physical attributes that many ladies now would go CRAZY after. But the words that came from HIS mouth, the way that HE lived and loved HIS heavenly FATHER, and the Hand of GOD that was with HIM daily Gave HIM favour even among prostitutes and other people.

His Heart, HIS mind, His Words everything about HIM was PURELY ATTRACTIVE, and only the Ignorant and prideful of heart would be ignorant of that.
Now as a bride we are attracted to our Bridegroom in a such an awesome manner, are not ladies suppose to be the very same?
Now as HE looks at us and expects to see us in a manner that is Attractive to HIM, is it not the same for men towards the Ladies?

For whether physical attributes coincide with what we want from a particular person or not, They do not keep a relationship going, only Christ in a man keeps that Marriage rocking. And yes it will feel like HEAVEN.

Yet if we seek the Lord with utmost seriousness on the matter, looks would not matter but only HIS WILL.

For the physical nature seeks to have what best suits it, but the Spiritual nature always looks for what best suits THE FATHER.

Our choice. I would say, GOD matters not looks!!.
 
Jan 28, 2010
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#25
good discussion gentlemen! thanks for the thoughts!
 
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GraceRevelation

Guest
#26
Looks to me aren't everything for sure. When I date people I do have to be somewhat attracted to them but looks aren't at the top of my list. Do my friends have to be attractive? No definitely not, being accepting of people no matter what they look like is important. If your attractive then good for you. God made us all unique and lovely no matter what other people may think. We look exactly how God intended us to look. Being comfortable with how you look is important it imparts confidence. Love on all people you meet not just the "pretty people".
 

Descyple

Senior Member
Jun 7, 2010
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#27
Love on all people you meet not just the "pretty people".
I would partially agree with GraceRevelation's comment above, but it is in fact biblical that we are to love "pretty people" a little bit more than everyone else. The Apostle Paul stated that fact himself in Galatians 6:10 which states "Let us do good toward all, and especially towards those of the household of gorgeousness."

I got that particular rendering from the "I'm Too Sexy For A Bible-Cover" translation!!!
 

Petals

Senior Member
Nov 29, 2012
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#28
What if when you marry somebody, you are attracted to them but when they get older, their looks fade.. would you still love them even though they are no longer as aesthetically pleasing to the eye as when you first got together with them?
 
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#29
What happens if you got in an accident would you want them to love you still
 
Jan 28, 2010
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#30
i think petals, as you grow older, your standard of beauty should follow that person which you have made the commitment too. For sure. If they are believers, then that should definitely be the case, because everyone ages, and very few age well. hahaha. But for non-christian couples, now-a-days they can divorce just based on a wrong christmas present. so anything is possible with them.

really good thoughts thanks everyone!! =]
 
A

Art05

Guest
#31
I have been called so many things before, especially on this site. One of the many things has been the phrase 'you are so superficial' or anything synonymous with that: materialistic, vain etc. If this happens again I'll probably snap, usually I just ignore it and laugh it off, because I don't care too much about what people think. But I wanted to open the forums, even though I know it has been discussed before (I just cant be bothered to look through all the threads).

This is a little portion of my ideals/checklist:
I prefer that a guy is well groomed and looks after himself physically.. (and all the other "ally's")
I must be attracted to him (physically)
He needs to be able to be responsible and educated in order to care and look after me.

I would hope that whoever my husband is also is seeking those same things in me as well.
And I am being very honest here - I know this is not right, so I am working on it, and I know that plenty of you do the same - I often find that I make more effort to talk to and make friends with people who I think are 'pretty' or 'attractive'. Maybe I just think all my friends are aesthetically pleasant, but I do find that I will be more inclined to talk to a attractive person than I would a not-so attractive person. I am working on this, so don't bite my head off because of that - I know it's wrong, but maybe this happens to you too?

I wanted to open this opportunity for you guys to tell me what you think about looks and physical appearances. I don't want people to just say the right things "I don't care about looks" cause that’s a load of rubbish. If you are going to say that, don't reply to this thread because I know that argument. I know about "looks are fleeting" and "God looks at the heart", I am well versed when if comes to the scriptures concerning this stuff.

Generally, I think that looks do matter. However, there are a lot of things that matter more, i.e. spiritually secure and solid in their walk.
Lynda, the truth is, that you're not much different any other woman in the world. And your 'ideals' (you may as well quit calling it that, because every man is pretty much imperfect, especially your future husband) are normal desires for a woman your age to have.

I also feel that I should be attractive to my future spouse (well, I'm actually not that attractive of a man, so I'll probably never marry), and there's nothing wrong with that. The truth is, women that end up marrying someone they aren't attracted to will always lust after the 'hotter' guys and, in many ways, will end up despising her husband as the years go on.

So I won't bite your head off for only making friends that you consider attractive; but I will tell you that I don't do that because many that are considered very attractive tend to usually have an ugly soul (keep in mind that this is not a sweeping generalization, but a statement made from personal experience). I try to make friends only with Christians, because the Bible says that we shouldn't be unequally yoked with unbelievers (friendship is a yoke, and this particular command of Scripture was not made specifically for marriage). The Bible says to love your neighbor as yourself, and I try to follow this command at all times, but friendship among the children of God should only happen with each other. I'm glad that you're working on it, though. Us unattractive folk aren't that bad, once you get to know us ;)

I don't live in a place where there are alot of Christians, and the truth is (again, from my own personal experience) that worldly girls tend out outdo Christian girls when it comes to beauty and attractiveness, and, unfortunately, even in personality. But (and I'm being honest) since there isn't a Christian girl my age here at all (that's available) (yes, this is the truth), then I guess I'm sort of stuck in the waiting game against my will lol.

So yes, when it comes to getting together with someone, then of course their appearance should be attractive to you. Personally, I have met women that, although I wasn't attracted to the physically at first sight, I grew to become more and more attracted to them physically as I began to like them and appreciate them for their other traits. I guess, this is why the Bible says "Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain."

Even though we naturally desire what is pleasing to our view of attractiveness, we, as Christians, should leave off the "lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes", and begin to know people past their exterior. It's so much easier to do things like the world and just get together with someone because you think they're good-looking, but God would have us wiser, and to be patient. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.
 
Jan 28, 2010
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#32
i really appreciate what you said art05. I absolutely understand that some parts of my personality and inclinations need adjustments.

With that said, I do think that the world has created a standard of beauty that is unrealistic and essentially false. Every person is tainted with this worldly perception, but there is a underlying signifier that qualifies higher than that, and thats your own standard of beauty. What i find attractive in a man, may not be what my sister/friend finds attractive. I might have strange tastes in men. Sometimes i ask myself of my good friends who marry some really strange looking boys, "WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER!?! she is so much prettier"or something superficial. And like, as you said, you can become attracted to someone over time, who you may not have been initially attracted to; through their personality and their heart.

I am absolutely not a rude and pretentious person, please don't think that. Thanks a lot for sharing! =]
 
D

didymos

Guest
#33
... The Lord does not look at the things people look at.
People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.

(1 Samuel 16:7)
 
A

Art05

Guest
#34
i really appreciate what you said art05. I absolutely understand that some parts of my personality and inclinations need adjustments.

With that said, I do think that the world has created a standard of beauty that is unrealistic and essentially false. Every person is tainted with this worldly perception, but there is a underlying signifier that qualifies higher than that, and thats your own standard of beauty. What i find attractive in a man, may not be what my sister/friend finds attractive. I might have strange tastes in men. Sometimes i ask myself of my good friends who marry some really strange looking boys, "WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER!?! she is so much prettier"or something superficial. And like, as you said, you can become attracted to someone over time, who you may not have been initially attracted to; through their personality and their heart.

I am absolutely not a rude and pretentious person, please don't think that. Thanks a lot for sharing! =]
Awh, I never thought that about you, honest :) I think you're a sweet girl that wants to please the Lord.

And, I'll be honest: I had been thinking about my answer to your thread, and you've responded in much of what I was thinking about! So I think we're on the right track hehe.

Sometimes, though, when "love" happens, at times it happens so suddenly; those strange, peculiar tastes that I may desire in a woman, or even those general wants that I tend to seek will probably be laid aside for the sake of that "love" ... know what I mean? And it'll feel okay to lay it aside, because that "love" stuff will tend to change your opinions or perspective.

hehe I'm just thinking aloud. God bless you, Lynda.
 
A

Art05

Guest
#36
Looks to me aren't everything for sure. When I date people I do have to be somewhat attracted to them but looks aren't at the top of my list. Do my friends have to be attractive? No definitely not, being accepting of people no matter what they look like is important. If your attractive then good for you. God made us all unique and lovely no matter what other people may think. We look exactly how God intended us to look. Being comfortable with how you look is important it imparts confidence. Love on all people you meet not just the "pretty people".
I love your response.

But I'm not attractive ... not good for me? haha

"We look exactly how God intended us to look." I'm still struggling with this.
 
M

Memory

Guest
#37
I've always been more attracted to big brains more than looks my whole life. The bigger the brain the more attractive the individual for me.
 

alexis

Banned by Admin Team (verified fraud)
Dec 5, 2013
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#38
honestly first impressions happen... For me it's more how the person prepares themselves.. Do they care? Are they able to care? I don't know it's complicated for sure.
All my friends are beautiful! Now before I get ripped apart about that what I mean is who they are. I don't date I'm too young.. So I try to not even think about who I would date. There will be time for that in years to come.
physical beauty is so often changed by personality and attitude.

Art I am sure there is a girl out there who will think you are handsome beyond words...
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#39
I suppose there always needs to be one. Thanks for taking time to reply to such a 'ridiculous' thread.
Actually what i said was the topic.. not the thread. The thread exists because of people spreading ignorant views that confuse people. Which is why you felt a need to make a thread on the subject. Because people have given you ignorant views. So, in reality, i neither insulted you, nor the thread, but the ignorant people who confuse an otherwise easy subject. Good of you to reply with sarcasm to someone offering you help.
 
Jan 28, 2010
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#40
i didn't ask for help though, it is just to share thoughts. relax.