I been reading this chat for a few days and I noticed a trend. Lots of Christians are waiting for the Lord to send them that significant other. Now, as a christian single myself I know what I'm about to write is going to cut some people's hearts, so I am trying to be very careful with my words and be gentle, and just remember that I am in the same boat as you.
When I prayed to the Lord for a spouse, I would always remind myself of scripture that if we pray for anything in his name, he will grant us. That if we ask our Father for his will, surely he will grant us the prayer.
No doubt all of us here at one time or another asked God for "The One". I remember when I was 16, I felt so lonely I was bawling to myself alone in the woods for a girlfriend. 12 years later, still no GF and I know the answer as to why. The answer was, because I only wanted a girlfriend to fornicate with.
Lets say God granted us our wish.. and we did receive our significant other. We would be rejoicing in the Lord as happy bee's and praising him for his goodness. But then we would be struggling in the flesh. One minute your holding hands, the next minute she's giving you that "look" that makes your mind wander about dirty things.
Now instead of serving God as 2 faithful servants, your fighting your flesh to not do something sinful. Your mind goes from a absolutely resolved NO.. to maybe... then to I hope not.. then to well if we love one another this deeply..
God said not to fornicate for our own sakes. When we hurt ourselves, we hurt him, and surely we couldn't be praying all this time to fulfill a lusty desire? Or perhaps to fill that loneliness void in hearts where HE should be?
Then I realized that I can't pray to God for a girlfriend because I would not only want her for the wrong reasons, but it would completely knock me off my track with God himself.
Soon we would justify our sex life and just hope God would forgive us in the end. And I think the reality is, God is just sparing us from having to ask him in the first place to forgive us for what he will know that we will do.
So, basically what I learned to do is be happy as a Single Christian. Some of you may have already caught me laughing and joking on CC mic and I really am content. But I am extremely heartbroken for all the christian brothers and sisters who are sitting in their room waiting.. wondering.. why hasn't God brought them that special person yet.
I think God is telling us that if we can't find joy in him in our most desperate alone times.. we will never find happiness in another person. We will depend upon them instead of the Lord, and that makes us a burden. This will cause fights and division and feelings of rejection.
I believe we must learn to be happy with just the Lord, and then only then, the happiness that shines forth from your face will draw others unto you, and eventually that special someone. I speak from experience as a sad depressed loner for years. It only pushs people away from you, they don't want to talk to you. But when your happy, laughing, and smiling, regardless of your circumstances, everyone wants to be around you.
I think a lot of loney depressed christians may also inversely push someone God was sending them through a sad countenance.
Just my honest look at the situation. I want everyone who is Single to be as happy as me! Seriously guys, life is too short to sit in our corners and watch everyone else enjoy life. I know what its like, its dark, lonely, and you only withdraw more.
Learn to walk with God and be happy in him, then I believe, he will send you the woman or man you desire, but the funny thing is.. when you get them.. suddenly you realize you don't want them as much now, because your content in the Lord.
God Bless.
When I prayed to the Lord for a spouse, I would always remind myself of scripture that if we pray for anything in his name, he will grant us. That if we ask our Father for his will, surely he will grant us the prayer.
No doubt all of us here at one time or another asked God for "The One". I remember when I was 16, I felt so lonely I was bawling to myself alone in the woods for a girlfriend. 12 years later, still no GF and I know the answer as to why. The answer was, because I only wanted a girlfriend to fornicate with.
Lets say God granted us our wish.. and we did receive our significant other. We would be rejoicing in the Lord as happy bee's and praising him for his goodness. But then we would be struggling in the flesh. One minute your holding hands, the next minute she's giving you that "look" that makes your mind wander about dirty things.
Now instead of serving God as 2 faithful servants, your fighting your flesh to not do something sinful. Your mind goes from a absolutely resolved NO.. to maybe... then to I hope not.. then to well if we love one another this deeply..
God said not to fornicate for our own sakes. When we hurt ourselves, we hurt him, and surely we couldn't be praying all this time to fulfill a lusty desire? Or perhaps to fill that loneliness void in hearts where HE should be?
Then I realized that I can't pray to God for a girlfriend because I would not only want her for the wrong reasons, but it would completely knock me off my track with God himself.
Soon we would justify our sex life and just hope God would forgive us in the end. And I think the reality is, God is just sparing us from having to ask him in the first place to forgive us for what he will know that we will do.
So, basically what I learned to do is be happy as a Single Christian. Some of you may have already caught me laughing and joking on CC mic and I really am content. But I am extremely heartbroken for all the christian brothers and sisters who are sitting in their room waiting.. wondering.. why hasn't God brought them that special person yet.
I think God is telling us that if we can't find joy in him in our most desperate alone times.. we will never find happiness in another person. We will depend upon them instead of the Lord, and that makes us a burden. This will cause fights and division and feelings of rejection.
I believe we must learn to be happy with just the Lord, and then only then, the happiness that shines forth from your face will draw others unto you, and eventually that special someone. I speak from experience as a sad depressed loner for years. It only pushs people away from you, they don't want to talk to you. But when your happy, laughing, and smiling, regardless of your circumstances, everyone wants to be around you.
I think a lot of loney depressed christians may also inversely push someone God was sending them through a sad countenance.
Just my honest look at the situation. I want everyone who is Single to be as happy as me! Seriously guys, life is too short to sit in our corners and watch everyone else enjoy life. I know what its like, its dark, lonely, and you only withdraw more.
Learn to walk with God and be happy in him, then I believe, he will send you the woman or man you desire, but the funny thing is.. when you get them.. suddenly you realize you don't want them as much now, because your content in the Lord.
God Bless.