J
Jullianna
Guest
I tell myself to put my big girl pants on all the time when I catch myself acting like a big ole whiney baby. I've been told the same by men. It woke me up to the reality of the situation.
Put your big boy pants on!!!!!!
- Thread starter Oncefallen
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You're in no need of special pants (figuratively or literally) perhaps the armor of God may benefit, but some seek comfort as in the words flowing ever sweetly from the mouth of God. It is found verily, verily in the bible. Christ was nice to those to whom it was due, and a wild man with a whip when the time, setting and circumstance called for it. Pick up your mature Christians' crosses and follow Christ. Remember my good friends be wise as serpents, but harmless as doves.
Just for clarification (since I "liked" the OP), I agree with what Jim said in general. At least one person mentioned that some girls like nice guys, so they shouldn't give up. This is true, as I'm one of those girls. However, it depends on when you're being nice and how; if you're not asking a girl out because "that wouldn't be nice", then it's going to take you much longer to find someone, if you ever do. You still have to be polite to the girls and all that, but there are times to be aggressive (or direct, anyway) as well. Come to think of it, the two guys I got the closest to romantically on this site pursued me at least a little bit. They were not rude, but they didn't give up talking to me after I seemed uninterested at first.
When Oncefallen mentioned not being a nice guy since you won't get a lady's attention that way, he wasn't saying that if you're a gentleman, you won't ever marry. He simply meant that guys need to be the pursuers. Otherwise they can only blame themselves for the lack of a girl in their lives. Correct me if I'm wrong, Jim
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When Oncefallen mentioned not being a nice guy since you won't get a lady's attention that way, he wasn't saying that if you're a gentleman, you won't ever marry. He simply meant that guys need to be the pursuers. Otherwise they can only blame themselves for the lack of a girl in their lives. Correct me if I'm wrong, Jim
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no, women have been the rejecters long enough, its time women get a taste at how rejection feels, how it feels to be told you aint good enough, too ugly, will never amount to anything.
Don't give anyone that much power over you. You make the choices in your life. You set the course. You choose to live or you choose to die. To eat or to drink, to sleep, to confront, to back off, all of it is in your control.
But when you give someone else the keys to your self worth and your identity, they will hurt you always, even when they mean not to and sometimes especially when they don't want to. You have to look out for yourself and believe in yourself.
Even if you are the only person who knows that you exist.
People have floated up to countries on raft with nothing to their name, and they made it. They refused to be labeled, to die.
I was always taught that ambition is evil. I should only want what I have and I should only take what I need. If I followed that line of reasoning to its conclusion, I would be eating garbage out of the back of a chinese Buffet.
If you want to be more, you have to be willing to fight for it. You have to take it for yourself. You can't worry about who its suppose to belong to, when the right job opens up, you need to apply confidently.
Don't be afraid to fail. It is worse to give up on failing than it is to fail a thousand times and still hope for success.
Sorry Liamson, I been smack in the face one to many times. not going to let it happen again.
fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me, ain't going to be a third time.
I will not go chasing any woman period. just not going to happen. I learned my lesson long ago. if a woman wants something to do with me, then she will have to come to me and you know what. chances are I am not going to believe a word she says.
who is the most foolish? the person who jumps from a bridge or the fool who follows him.
fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me, ain't going to be a third time.
I will not go chasing any woman period. just not going to happen. I learned my lesson long ago. if a woman wants something to do with me, then she will have to come to me and you know what. chances are I am not going to believe a word she says.
who is the most foolish? the person who jumps from a bridge or the fool who follows him.
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah
Guest
Or maybe it just hurts you and makes you feel rejected.
Your not all men, you are 1. Could some feel this way... Probably, but not all men are overly sensitive and have a complex because their little feelings have been hurt.
I'm a woman and if i was whinning like a little baby i'd feel better if some one told me to grow up rather than coddle me. That can cripple a person.
I bet if I asked a thousand super models out, I would get at least 5 or 6 dates.
maybe you could. me I would end up 0/1,000
I believe that at this point, we all know your opinion of women. There is no need to continue driving your point home. You have obviously been deeply hurt, however that is no excuse for continually hurting and alienating others by these frequent and emphatic blanket grievances.
-_-
When Oncefallen mentioned not being a nice guy since you won't get a lady's attention that way, he wasn't saying that if you're a gentleman, you won't ever marry. He simply meant that guys need to be the pursuers. Otherwise they can only blame themselves for the lack of a girl in their lives. Correct me if I'm wrong, Jim
I had to read the OP to refresh my memory as to my train of thought at the time.
Simply put, a large percentage (not all) of the self proclaimed "nice guys" that I've met over the years are men that, although they may appear to be nice on the surface, have deep rooted emotional issues that cause behaviors that they perceive to be nice that really are not.
Just as an example, passive aggressive..."I'm a nice guy, I never argue with my lady" but they don't realize that giving her the cold shoulder when he doesn't get his way will kill her spirit.
Or they hang their hat on absolutism, "every woman I've tried to date has been mean to me, so all women are mean" without contemplating that maybe something within them might be steering them towards or attracting abusive women to them.
I am just speaking my mind. But you know it does appear that from a lot of women, that its OK for women to reject tell guys they are ugly, not good enough, ect, ect. but don't dare a guy do it.
Have I been deeply hurt? yeah. females were down right cruel to me. so cruel I finally at about 16 said forget it. and decided at that point, why even care? could of cared less if I lived or died. could care less if someone likes me or not. and I leaned don't trust anybody.
truthfully, I don't care if I live another day or not, I really do not care.
That is a very sad frame of mind for you to be in. I'm truly sorry that you are struggling with this apathy for life.
Concerning your posts though, I wonder if you realize that nearly every post that you make is anti-female? An important skill in life is knowing when to let something go. You need to let it go, brother. Your way of thinking is poisoning your soul.
James 4:13-15 Go to now, ye that say, To day or to morrow we will go into such a city, and continue there a year, and buy and sell, and get gain: Whereas ye know not what [shall be] on the morrow. For what [is] your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away. For that ye [ought] to say, If the Lord will, we shall live, and do this, or that.
could be stated as about every post I made in reference to men is anti-men. cause I see a lot of men who do nothing but abuse,use,and toss aside.
wasnt long ago here I told some female to leave the guy she was with cause in my opinion he was just using her to get in her pants. And I will go on record to say many many men are like that. I see it every single day.
as for letting go, Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it. I have lived enough of it and I don't want to see anymore. you can take the nicest person in the world. bagger him and trash him enough. and he will become a bitter old man.
C
cubfan716
Guest
As guys, we haven't been trained to protect femininity. We've been trained to conquer it. But the essence of a Christ-built warrior isn't just overcoming difficult obstacles (e.g. women with morals) but rather to become a difficult obstacle, standing in the way of all forms of impurity and injustice. A warrior doesn't complain about sacred boundary lines; he gives his life to protect them.
We've been trained in the art of love and romance as if we were gorillas learning the art of removing a banana from its peel. We learn not to smoosh the precious and tasty fruit; but then once we've wooed it out of its protective barrier, we devour it for dinner. It is high time we redirect our warrior instinct and become a woman's protector rather than her conqueror.
In romantic love, a Christ-built warrior learns the curvatures of his lover's heart. learns the vulnerable points and most tender areas of her feminine soul, and then positions himself to defend those points with his very life.
A Christ-built warrior seeks to guard and defend a woman's heart.
- Eric Luis, God's Gift to Women
Paul the apostle said to do nothing from selfishness or conceit but in humility count others better than yourselves. He stated that each of us should look not for our own interests but the interests of others.
May the love of Christ abound all the pains of the past no matter what has occurred. Learn to forgive as He forgave us!
I've never seen these posts. I only see posts speaking of how you've been mistreated by women. I am not insulted by your hatred of women, but you yourself are being damaged by it, and I believe you should be discouraged from such talk at every turn. These words harm yourself and those around you who read them.
And yet bitterness is a poison, and you would do well to fight against it. Perhaps your life would be happier.
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:31,32
See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no “root of bitterness” springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled. Hebrews 12:15
One time in the Navy...
I had a good friend and his mom and his brother came to pick us up to go to the Airport.
On the way to the Airport I was teller her about All the stuff his son had seen and done so far. I told her that he was a fast runner, that he was liked by his peers and that he was doing well.
He had some self esteem issues but, I took it upon myself to take an investment into his life, to make it better.
When I told her that he was strong and could do like 8 pull ups with a bag full of goodies on his back, she turned around and said, "the only thing strong about him, is his smell." She and his brother laughed about that joke. And he laughed with them.
His Brother was a Marine and a High school all sports all star.
His mother was divorced and hated men, and she decided that her youngest son would never live up to amount to anything. She played favorites and one could do no wrong while the other one could do no right.
I was horrified. I've never really gotten along with my mother, because we've had our issues but, she and I are on good terms. But I can look back on my childhood and realize that it was a blessing.