I believe spousal abuse is rampant in conservative churches! I have worked with an abuse group, and the majority of women who seek help are Christian women. I believe this is because of the resurgence of patriarchal dominance, which is not only out of place in our culture, but based on the worst Biblical exegetical of 2 verses!
i have argued again and again that Gal. 3:28 should be the Biblical start of relationships. Headship is taken out of context of a passage in Ephesians 5 which is written about the headship of Christ, and the startling instructions in Greek and Roman cultures for a husband to love his wife. This was radical in the 1st century, and it seems to be radical in conservative churches.
I was reading a book today called, "I am Malala." It is about the 12 year old girl in Pakistan who this book was shot in the face by the Taliban for wanting to go to school. Her father was a teacher and encouraged her to learn. But the conservative Muslims, who interpreted the Qur'an to mean only men were worthwhile, began to push their way into the towns and villages esp. after 9/11 and enforce their brand of patriarchy, that women and girls were less than men.
This book reminds me so much of what I see happening in Christian churches today it both scared and outraged me!!! We are all God's children and Christ is our head. Only Christ has been given all authority, and we need to obey God rather then men. Too many women have been forced to squander God's gifts, because of arrogant and haughty men, who want women barefoot and pregnant, just like the Taliban.
Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely! This is why abuse is rampant in the church. Men that have claimed this so-called "headship" have become "heady" with power. They are corrupting the very foundation of living together as children of the King.
As as for divorce, no woman has to live in fear of mental or physical abuse. I dare any man to live in a house with a bigger, stronger and more dominate person and stay when the abuse occurs regularly. Women need to leave such abusers, and have a restored life, free of the terror of abuse!
And our churches need to be leaders, rather than hiding behind the double screens of male hierarchy and the lie that "God hates divorce." No, God hates abusive husbands, and they will be judged for it one day, and the churches and pastors who allowed it to continue in their flocks will also be held accountable!
(P.S. I would be happy to go over the Greek, history and culture of the Ephesians and Corinthians one more time for the newcomers!)
