Confession: It's been weeks and I still haven't been able to pray. I think my faith may be shattered for good and it's something that I am struggling with.
Confession: I cried myself to sleep last night. First time in a long time.
Confession: I cried myself to sleep last night. First time in a long time.
there's major drama in my family. like epic craziness (mostly because of one person) and we all are players in this ridiculous show. i've spent my life fleeing that flavor of crazy and taking leave from that insanity.
because i hate the drama, i've navigated much of it the last couple years by greatly limiting my contact with the majority of them.
what is scariest to me is that, while i miss them, i miss the drama even less.
the acknowledgement of how easily i've come to accept that fact (and its implications) is really troubling, or at least terribly sad.
i don't know how to handle it, aside from prayer. i need to re-engage, and it won't be easy.

Confession: I cried myself to sleep last night. First time in a long time.
I'm so sorry. I wish I could do something to help you.
Misty.. my secret is that I do that.. every night. I have been for months. In January I stopped for about three weeks and now I'm back to that girl again.
I confess: at one point, I was crying myself to sleep every night, and the way I stopped it was to start drinking myself to sleep every night.![]()
I'm so very broken I've trusted people who broke me at my weakest moments and right now I have a hard time living life normally.
Confession: I still compare myself to other women sometimes. I used to be really, really bad at that in high school, it got better in college and I'm much better now. But, I still sometimes do. It's stupid, it's never helpful and I never feel better, and even if it did make me feel better, at what cost? Putting someone else down in my mind?
It's all relative, too. I say to myself sometimes, "I'd rather have her health issues but have a model's body like she does than have good health and scarred body the way I do." But, then I'm sure there's someone who would rather have my scarred legs than no legs at all. It's stupid wishful thinking that gets me nowhere and is unhealthy for myself and for how I view others.
I think it's my root of insecurity, of not feeling good enough, that pulls me that direction. I need to let God garden and dig in my heart.
It's possible those people didn't fully understand what they were doing.
One reason why Christ said..."Father forgive them for they know not what they do" when they ridiculed him and put him on the cross at his weakest moment.
If you've been persecuted for Christ and shared in his sufferings...you've been blessed
1 Peter 4:13
But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ,
so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
Misty.. my secret is that I do that.. every night. I have been for months. In January I stopped for about three weeks and now I'm back to that girl again.
Confession: I cried myself to sleep last night. First time in a long time.
Confession.... I used to feel like I was undeserving of love because I'm overweight. Not that I ever looked down on other overweight people ..just myself. I felt like it's my own fault because it's something you can 'fix' and that I would never be selfish enough to expect anyone to have to settle with me. Thankfully a lot of very good friends and the good Lord opening my eyes I now realize that God loved me so much (just as I am ) that he gave his only son for ME! God loves me. Not only that but he has put me in a family that loves ME. And I have friends who love ME just like I am.... I know I have some work to do on me .. but I love me. And I no longer feel like I don't deserve it.
I have had the preasure to love you, as a friend and, if you just watched this video, Free Hugs in Sondrio, Italy... Christian ways? - YouTube
my tears will be drawn close.