Paul placed emphasis on subjection and respect. Of course, a husband who exercises his headship in a proper manner will make it easier for his wife to remain in subjection.
Paul also stated that a wife “should have deep respect for her husband.” A Christian wife should manifest a “quiet and mild spirit,” not arrogantly challenging her husband or taking an independent course. (1 Peter 3:4) A godly wife works hard for the good of the household and brings honor to her head. (Titus 2:4, 5) She will endeavor to speak well of her husband and thus do nothing to cause others to disrespect him. She will also work hard to make his decisions succeed.-Proverbs 14:1.
Having a quiet and mild spirit does not mean that a Christian woman does not have opinions or that her thinking is unimportant. Godly women of old, such as Sarah and Rebekah, took the initiative to express their concern about matters, and the Bible record shows that Jehovah approved of their actions. (Genesis 21:8-12; 27:46–28:4) Christian wives too can make their feelings known. However, they should do so considerately, not in demeaning tones. They will likely find that such communication will be more pleasing and effective. Consider the Bible account of Abigail.-1 Samuel 25:2-35.
Often, men who are verbally injurious have a distorted view of the God-assigned roles for husband and wife. A husband may feel that headship entitles him to absolute control. But this is not so. His wife, though in subjection, is not his slave. She is his “helper” and “complement.” (Genesis 2:18) Read Ephesians 5:28, 29.
It would not be a good thing, then, for a wife to feel pressured to do what she knows is very unwise or in violation of godly principles, in the name of subjection, she should not be made to feel guilty for taking initiative in some essential matter, as did Abigail and Sarah. Be cognitive that both churches may not be beneficial.-2 Timothy 3:16.
Wifely does not mean that a wife must always comply with everything a husband wishes. The difference are when right principles are at stake, she may have to disagree with her husband. Even so, she should still display the overall spirit of godly subjection.
Of course, a wife should be careful not to bypass her husband’s wishes out of willfulness, spite, or other wrong motives. She must be discerning, “good in discretion,” as was Abigail.-1 Samuel 25:3.
The primary goal and spirit of a wife’s godly subjection is to please Jehovah by cooperating with her husband and supporting his decisions. This is fairly easy when a husband is spiritually mature. It can be a challenge if he is not.
