I know this is a broad question...but what kind if things do men bottle up inside that they can't even tell their family or their closest siblings? And it eats them up inside...something maybe they been through or something they did in the past that their ashamed of? For an example my mom husband is a Vietnam vet. And still is traumatized from what he saw and wont talk about it...what are something's that men keep bottle up and feel they can't talk about it to no one??
Question for men
- Thread starter Jruiz
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J
In general,whatever people hide(men/women) is because they are fully aware that society will label them 'out of mind' than helping them.The real prob is not about hiding,but the immaturity of the society that people who find a hard time hiding has got to deal with.Check it with any situation..Correct me if am wrong..
U
There is no way to answer this question because all people are different. I know some women who bottle things up and men that are very open. The issue isn't a gender issue, its an issue with your husband, as an individual. Try to avoid lumping peoples behaviors in by gender alone. We're all different.
Because we find it too difficult to express in words. That's why men run, or hit stuff, or take up a hobby. Expressing something in words, that is too big to be contained in them, seems thin and pointless and futile. Sometimes we just have to act instead. Whether that action is locking it away never to be touched or driving a car on an open road at a hundred or hitting a bag. Sometimes words are too narrow.
B
What are you after? You want us to give you insight as to what men hide. What does your husband think of you coming into a forum room talking to other men about him behind his back? My wife gets the intimate knowledge from me, not from strangers online. If he is having serious issues that are affecting you, then you both need to see a counsellor. Fear of rejection is one factor. Maybe past sins that he thinks you won't forgive him for. That may need to be brought before God. He needs to know he can trust you and that you are mature enough to forgive him and still love him for who he is. I tell my wife my most of what's bothering me. I ask her to love me and not be angry with me when I have to tell her what I have bottled up, so to speak. Blessings. And your name fooled me. I finally read your profile. I hope you are being open with your husband about what you are doing on here. And not bottling it up. Blessings, Larry
B
@Jruiz. Please disregard this comment JUIZ. I aloud my feelings to interfere with my thoughts. I am sorry for the way I answered your enquiry. God bless you with the answers you are looking for. Prayer is more powerful than a mans will. I will commit this to prayer, rather than shooting my mouth off like I know something. Regards, Larry.
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
It is true that as a group, men will not express much emotion. This is a cultural and genetic thing, crying or being emotional is a sign of weakness and being effeminate as thats what women do, not men. Stiff upper lip old chap.
As for not talking about war, well that is understandable. Most men coming back from a war do not tell people about their combat experience. Horrors of war are just that, horrific and too ghastly to even repeat to anyone, so remain locked away.
However we are all individuals and each has their own reason and behaviour. My ex wife used to keep things bottled up and would not talk to me about her problems, had she done so I might still be married to her.
It is true that as a group, men will not express much emotion. This is a cultural and genetic thing, crying or being emotional is a sign of weakness and being effeminate as thats what women do, not men. Stiff upper lip old chap.
As for not talking about war, well that is understandable. Most men coming back from a war do not tell people about their combat experience. Horrors of war are just that, horrific and too ghastly to even repeat to anyone, so remain locked away.
However we are all individuals and each has their own reason and behaviour. My ex wife used to keep things bottled up and would not talk to me about her problems, had she done so I might still be married to her.
J
you can talk about it without shame to people who are still falling and trying to get out of it.No need to be ashamed to share where its needed.
Who should be avoided?pastor in the church,the fellow believer who you think is God's Righteousness(and not),etc.They will crucify you if you say that.
But Jesus won't.He will only encourage you.That's how you share the Gospel.
God Bless.
Look for the right crowd.Jesus never preached to pharisees and other nobles of His time.His audience were the outcasts and street rats,He walked with them changing them.'self righteous' won't reach Heaven.
Who should be avoided?pastor in the church,the fellow believer who you think is God's Righteousness(and not),etc.They will crucify you if you say that.
But Jesus won't.He will only encourage you.That's how you share the Gospel.
God Bless.
Look for the right crowd.Jesus never preached to pharisees and other nobles of His time.His audience were the outcasts and street rats,He walked with them changing them.'self righteous' won't reach Heaven.
J
"A woman who gave birth with difficulty, involving a complicated mopping up process for a midwife, might not want to talk to men about the details.
A medic who had to make quick decisions about the open entrails of dying soldiers on the battlefield, might be reluctant also to talk about it, also." Listen to what faroukfarouk said.
And understand these words below.Its from Holy Scripture.
Ecclesiastes 1:18 KJV
"For in much wisdom is much grief: and he that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow."
Don't feel sad about what's being said.Take it for Good.
If you like interceding for others and help them,start doing it with Prayer.When God leads,you will be strong enough to help.
He is Almighty,and the unshaking God.
God Bless
A medic who had to make quick decisions about the open entrails of dying soldiers on the battlefield, might be reluctant also to talk about it, also." Listen to what faroukfarouk said.
And understand these words below.Its from Holy Scripture.
Ecclesiastes 1:18 KJV
"For in much wisdom is much grief: and he that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow."
Don't feel sad about what's being said.Take it for Good.
If you like interceding for others and help them,start doing it with Prayer.When God leads,you will be strong enough to help.
He is Almighty,and the unshaking God.
God Bless
I find the social stigma thing of men not showing emotion to actually be a reaction to what women think of men. For instance, many women see men as 'manly', but also say 'I wish he'd show his feelings'.
I can tell you, there have been many times where i felt like crying, or punching things, or whatever else. Lots of women desire for men to express, but I'll be honest, when a woman sees a guy cry over something other than grief, she will often view him as weaker and realize a 'weak' man (who shows his emotions) wasn't what she really wanted.
I can tell you, there have been many times where i felt like crying, or punching things, or whatever else. Lots of women desire for men to express, but I'll be honest, when a woman sees a guy cry over something other than grief, she will often view him as weaker and realize a 'weak' man (who shows his emotions) wasn't what she really wanted.
J
i am a man.Is that something to be bothered about?
Let me see from the past when i expressed,what all i got.
1.A woman yelled at me and called me a mad person.
2.They felt afraid.
3.One north indian girl wanted to accept me as friend in FB and then when i began to be honest with her rather than giving way for silly talk,she called me things i cannot say here.
That's what men usually get for not being superman.Just saying it as it is.
Come to think of it,the only 1 who understood me despite the times i tried to stay away from her because of her extreme protective care towards me was my mom.She never shouted at me when i talked straight to her.But by the time i wanted to do things that could please her on my behalf as a son,she left this world.
Maybe in future there might be a woman in my life,but if i think i can run to Her expressing all my situations i better not marry.
We all have God to express anything and everything.
We are all (man or woman) weak without God.
God Bless
Let me see from the past when i expressed,what all i got.
1.A woman yelled at me and called me a mad person.
2.They felt afraid.
3.One north indian girl wanted to accept me as friend in FB and then when i began to be honest with her rather than giving way for silly talk,she called me things i cannot say here.
That's what men usually get for not being superman.Just saying it as it is.
Come to think of it,the only 1 who understood me despite the times i tried to stay away from her because of her extreme protective care towards me was my mom.She never shouted at me when i talked straight to her.But by the time i wanted to do things that could please her on my behalf as a son,she left this world.
Maybe in future there might be a woman in my life,but if i think i can run to Her expressing all my situations i better not marry.
We all have God to express anything and everything.
We are all (man or woman) weak without God.
God Bless