never had a gf. don't see much hope of ever getting one. any suggestions?
- Thread starter Arcynaculr
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You only want one person exactly in your life, and you want that to be your girlfriend?
I can tell you that most girls, even loner girls, want their boyfriend to have other friends, and vice versa for guys. Being each other's one and only relationship is not healthy, no matter if you're a "loner" or not.
I can tell you that most girls, even loner girls, want their boyfriend to have other friends, and vice versa for guys. Being each other's one and only relationship is not healthy, no matter if you're a "loner" or not.
D
No problem, you can do things anyway you want.....I was just giving some practical advice. Nothing wrong with being a loner if that's what you want, but I was definitely suggesting "If you want to have a girlfriend, you have to talk to girls". Unless you luck up and the first one you talk to happens to be a good match, your almost certainly going to have to talk to more than one. Socialize.
If you've already decided that the only way you will pursue a girlfriend is if you meet her online, and you have decided to never get to know a girl in real life and pursue her.....my suggestion will have no value to you. Either way, I hope you find one.
If you've already decided that the only way you will pursue a girlfriend is if you meet her online, and you have decided to never get to know a girl in real life and pursue her.....my suggestion will have no value to you. Either way, I hope you find one.
It can work... i dont see what the big deal is.
What good would other friends do me? And why should she care?
If she wants to be alone with her friends, she can be.
Me having no friends does not affect her at all.
And if we happen to both have no friends, then either one can still have alone time if they want.
So why is it "unhealthy"?
What good would other friends do me? And why should she care?
If she wants to be alone with her friends, she can be.
Me having no friends does not affect her at all.
And if we happen to both have no friends, then either one can still have alone time if they want.
So why is it "unhealthy"?
Do you see your attitude? This is my third post in this thread and you have yet to reply once with a bit of gratitude and say 'thankyou for your help'. I have given nothing but compassion for those who suffer from depression. You've also received some excellent advice acknowledging the condition and what you can do about it. What i do not have ANY sympathy is your bitter, sarcastic, selfish attitude. The more I read of your posts and replies to me and others, the more i believe what i originally thought - you need God and you need to do a huge amount of work on yourself - THAT should be your number one priority.
Your understanding is completely missing from what i said, and as such, your analogy is way off. Do you really think i'm that ignorant to tell someone with cancer or depression to just 'get better'? Of course not, that's stating the obvious. The 'get happy' was pointing out all the things that you have to be appreciative for and all the things that could not only turn your attitude around but help with depression as a result.
No one's asking anyone to reject another person because they're depressed - i think they need help, but i think you need a major attitude and perspective readjustment too. It is becoming evident by your replies as i go along that you actually like playing the victim. Don't expect any progress in any area of your life with this mentality.
No one's asking anyone to reject another person because they're depressed - i think they need help, but i think you need a major attitude and perspective readjustment too. It is becoming evident by your replies as i go along that you actually like playing the victim. Don't expect any progress in any area of your life with this mentality.
If i remember right, you were the one who told me: "you're 20!!! Get freakin happy!!!"
And you also said that happiness is attractive. Which implies depressed people are not attractive. (because of a condition they cant help)
Based on those comments it seems you do not understand and say inconsiderate things.
I guess you had good intentions but you need to think about what you say...
And you also said that happiness is attractive. Which implies depressed people are not attractive. (because of a condition they cant help)
Based on those comments it seems you do not understand and say inconsiderate things.
I guess you had good intentions but you need to think about what you say...
Constant pain makes it hard to appreciate anything. Can you appreciate things very easily with a knife constantly stabbing you in the arm? Doubt it.
And now you assume i like to be a victim. why? Cuz i have not magically gotten better after a few pages of discussion on a forum??
Cuz i have not told everyone "oh thank you, you have helped me so much!!"?
I did say i was appreciative of the effort people have made. what more do you want?
And now you assume i like to be a victim. why? Cuz i have not magically gotten better after a few pages of discussion on a forum??
Cuz i have not told everyone "oh thank you, you have helped me so much!!"?
I did say i was appreciative of the effort people have made. what more do you want?
Are you actually genuinely interested in getting better? Or are you more interested in pettily fighting?
I think your ignorance is astounding. When someone cares enough to write in and post to you and point out all the things that you should be grateful for - ie: your young age and actually throughout this thread, various people have pointed out your age as a positive factor in all this, not just me - it's a source of encouragement.
Your black and white interpretations of what i say which 100% of the time play the victim stance only illustrate my point. Let me break it down for you even further than I already thought was obvious: Happiness is attractive. You originally posted about not having a significant other. Depression aside, i pointed out all the things that you should be grateful for and will help change your attitude to something more positive - thus being able to help you with what you wanted. Your depression was also addressed encouraging you to go to God and develop a relationship with Him.
I have never once made this blanket black and white statement "depressed people are unattractive" and i'm not going to respond to your sarcastic victim playing remark again of "yeah depressed people are depressing to be around so don't be around them". My intentions are good and i have considered what i've posted and i stand by every word. I think your interpretations are ignorant, they play the victim, they're sarcastic and ungrateful. If you're actually interested in turning things around start showing some gratitude, take up the advice and start educating yourself about what you can do.
It doesn't surprise me in the slightest that no one wants to be around you - that's evidence enough for you to change your attitude and work on yourself - both of which you can do with God before you entertain the idea of having someone else on the end of you.
Can we all please stop feeding this troll?
I find it highly suspect that this person, who hadn't posted anything before yesterday, would look at a random, seemingly sarcastic post and look the person up and view his threads (let alone know how to do so, despite never having posted before).
This is obviously dothackzero.
The anime is a dead giveaway, as well as posting the same exact stuff and making a bunch of pity threads, and then refusing to listen to wise council. Lets see this for what it is, people!
I find it highly suspect that this person, who hadn't posted anything before yesterday, would look at a random, seemingly sarcastic post and look the person up and view his threads (let alone know how to do so, despite never having posted before).
This is obviously dothackzero.
The anime is a dead giveaway, as well as posting the same exact stuff and making a bunch of pity threads, and then refusing to listen to wise council. Lets see this for what it is, people!
How dare you. Your attitude is absolutely disgusting. You don't know me or what i've gone through. Your sarcastic bitterness has just been illustrated even further.
I don't have to assume you like playing the victim, it is illustrated time and again throughout your responses. It's like i have to state the obvious to your immature sarcasm: No i don't expect you to 'get better' after this discussion, i would've hoped it would've given you new ideas, encouragement and some direction, all of which could've been responded with with a bit of a gratitude. Certainly too me you've been nothing but sarcastic, immature and revelling in being the victim.
I think you're a really sick person. If you're experiencing depression or have been diagnosed with this, I encourage you to get help. I encourage you to go to God and develop your relationship with Him, that's the best thing you can do, forget about dates/relationships, please go and seek God, He's the number one thing you need.
Dude... calm down...
I cant believe im being accused of being somebody that im not... this is ridiculous.
So i like anime stuff and have a similar problem. lots of people do.
And i searched that name on here cuz someone asked if that was me... so i was curious why someone would associate me with that person. geez.
I dont intend on starting nearly as many threads as that guy did.
And dont worry, i will leave soon.
But seriously, dont spout off accussations based off a few similarities.
And its hard for me to believe that im that much like that guy... I mean im my own person!!
You dont know me very well so maybe the only things you know about me seem like that guy but im sure im actually alot different from him.
I cant wrap my head around this illogical accusation :/
I cant believe im being accused of being somebody that im not... this is ridiculous.
So i like anime stuff and have a similar problem. lots of people do.
And i searched that name on here cuz someone asked if that was me... so i was curious why someone would associate me with that person. geez.
I dont intend on starting nearly as many threads as that guy did.
And dont worry, i will leave soon.
But seriously, dont spout off accussations based off a few similarities.
And its hard for me to believe that im that much like that guy... I mean im my own person!!
You dont know me very well so maybe the only things you know about me seem like that guy but im sure im actually alot different from him.
I cant wrap my head around this illogical accusation :/
In my 30's I was on a business trip in Maryland - I had a dry spell from dating and I wanted to meet some new guys so I made a few simple rules for myself. I had to meet 7 guys, have a brief conversation and get their name - that was it. I had no other expectations. So I started and I had some nice conversations and along the way I met a really nice guy and we ended up dating for a little while. He also was on business in Maryland but lived in Louisiana. I at the time was living in Florida so being a long distance relationship it didn't last long. However, those simple rules really worked for me and if I ever decided to date again I would put myself out there and be a little bit more friendly than I am right now. Maybe you could try it and see what happens.