For laughs - What you Don’t Want to Hear On A First Date

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1 - I don't like ugly.
2 - My last 5 husbands all died in their sleep... the police still haven't figure it out *giggle
3 - Hi, my names Misty (i just insulted 3 CCers at once, that should count for something =P now they will all be wondering, muahahahahahahaaaa)

For number two, I can not help it but I had 3 ex girlfriends who passed away.. but you are right, I would NOT say that on first date. UNLESS she brought up that her husband died and is searching for right man to marry. My ex wife is a widow before I met her. There are other Christian women I met more recent times are widows as well. Then that is when I can say that I can relate because my ex gfs passed away. All three by heart attack.
 
I have some to say I do not want to hear...

"Oh I lost my husband and I am struggling right now but I am here to look for a new husband" (heard of that)

"Yes".. "Yes"..."Yes"... (that is all she says as she listen to me but never say anything to me)

The worse line ever should receive the award is..(with drum roll please!!) "Oh you are Deaf! I did not know that! I am so sorry, honey (in an insulting sarcastic way)! Let me see if I can remember this...(thinking) Here, let me try this.." (now trying to spell everything for "My name is Jane Doe. What is your name?" (I would lose in the middle of her slow spelling and I need to read again what she said). This is the worse line I ever heard.
 
For number two, I can not help it but I had 3 ex girlfriends who passed away.. but you are right, I would NOT say that on first date. UNLESS she brought up that her husband died and is searching for right man to marry. My ex wife is a widow before I met her. There are other Christian women I met more recent times are widows as well. Then that is when I can say that I can relate because my ex gfs passed away. All three by heart attack.

You do know that this thread is meant to be humorous?
 
I might be gay, but I'm not sure so I asked you out. True story. Turns out he is gay, bit he told me that I didn't make him gay. That was reassuring, lol.
 
I might be gay, but I'm not sure so I asked you out. True story. Turns out he is gay, bit he told me that I didn't make him gay. That was reassuring, lol.

This is totally rich! That's gotta be the worst I've heard. What did he say? "I might be gay, not sure, so I asked you out. Pretty sure I'm gay now....5 minutes with you and I'm whistling broadway hits."

What did you say to this guy??
 
Kenthomas I said, I think we should be friends and not think of this as a date. I also mentioned how I have never had anyone say that to me before. We are still friends. He was actually there for me through some pretty tough times.