End Of The Line

[Funrider]

(Some of you know me from chat).

...Needed to gather my thoughts. Just recently, around 11:45pm on 05/11/2014, I had once again went onto Chat (BibleStudy), and pretty much said it...that I was done with Jesus, and wanted him out.

At this moment, I feel done. Apparently, to follow the cross is to deny everything of comfort of this world. To follow Jesus...is not something I enjoy, or find happiness in. To me, following Jesus...has become a form of spiritual prison for me.

I tried praying, seeking wisdom in the holy word, and associating, but to be honest...I feel the bible is one gigantic lie. It HAS to be true. The bible HAS to be real, and life-giving, but I cant see it,nor have I ever been able to.

...but everyone else I know has managed to experience blessing.


You all can say "I love God", but all I say is "I hate God, and I wish I could hurt God". I dont know how you people can be so loving towards God. To me, he cheats me on a daily basis, but demands I follow through on his will. That's called a SLAVEDRIVER. God is a slavedriver. Period.

How can a 'loving' LORD deny his followers the peace he promised? How does that make God different than a politician or a thief?

I'm seriously about to deny Jesus, right this very moment. Jesus didn't do crap for me. This whole "dying on the cross" thing...supposedly it was to save the human race, but I dont see myself saved, NOR DO I SEE A RETURN ON INVESTMENT FOR BELIEVING IN HIM.

It was a waste of my time, and I'm not sure why I even bother. YOU TELL ME...what's the point of Jesus. All I care about is a minimum of a strong six-figure income to provide for my family, a business I can grow, a family I can love, and the luxuries needed to ensure my children do not have to suffer "God's test", or whatever *edited* God justifies as a suffering of love. If God cant provide this, I DONT NEED HIM EVER.

Period.

But you tell me...why should I continue putting my faith in a lying spirit?

 

[kenthomas27]

Hi Funrider. You know, as I think about it and look back over history, this Christian faith of ours is rife with those who surrender things that perhaps were not necessary to relinquish. I can think of a certain Quaker sect that I have always had an interest in that practiced celibacy as part of their devotion to Christ. Fine for them, only they didn't last long! Of course, they wouldn't last, would they? This means that their mission of being a witness to others for Christ was something of a dying cause because they had no legacy. They were a blip on history's screen. Other devoted and ardent believers felt it necessary to handle rattlesnakes as a testament of their faith. Not being bit was proof of the protection God provided. This worked until they were bit. Then they would say, if it's God's will to save me, then He will! (A lot of them said this as their final words)

The point I'm trying to make Funrider, is that it is GRACE by which we are saved and not through anything we do! What is grace anyway? It's plain ole Mercy. God is merciful that He sent his Only Son Jesus as sacrifice. And to be totally honest Funrider, I'm not certain God even WANTED to sacrifice His Only Son. It was because He KNEW that we sin-natured humans were prone to symbolic gestures and had sacrificed TRUCKLOADS of goats and rams and bulls and all sorts of food GOD had provided in the past and He knew this would be a gesture mankind would understand and appreciate.

As something of an unwanted result, there were men that sacrificed much. More than you and there will be men who sacrifice more after you're gone, all in their feeble attempts to earn their "extra" salvation for whatever reason, but you, Funrider, are set FREE from this bondage because of MERCY. This is why you have no return coming to you.

That being said, there must be something going on with your life that makes you feel as though there is no peace for you. Because of your investment of faith, you feel as though God should provide this peace for you. And that it should be now or at least at a time that you think you need it. Because you have sought wisdom in the holy Word and prayed, you feel as though there should be just recompense for your efforts.

A part of our Christian "awakening" is understanding what "surrender" means. Surrender means to submit - to renounce our self, to capitulate. We are acknowledging that God made His Sacrifice for us for Reasons He Chose. Not through our works, should you feel like boasting. We are surrendering to that acknowledgement. We do not make this submittal for payment. We do not expect a good long and peaceful life. We do not bargain for a peaceful heart or a loving wife or all things we think will better us. Most importantly, God doesn't require these payments. He requires our faith.

So - in times of trauma and strain and when our hearts are burdened the most, these are times when the ONE thing is tested more than any other thing. Did you notice what it was? Did you notice that it wasn't your wasted time you were concerned with, it wasn't that you were angry with God or a lack of blessings that was tested at all.

It was your faith Funrider. This is the thing you need to concentrate on preserving. All these others are dust in the wind. You'll see....

 

[Funrider]

I trust that.

I still believe, even though I shouldn't, or dont want to.
"What has been seen...cannot be unseen".

I believe I have seen Jesus, I know him, and he knows me. I believe the son of man came to die for our sins. I think, because of this, I am now obligated to accept, and deal with the crap God gives me. It's like "Ok, Fun. You've accepted my son as LORD. Well done. You have saved your soul from condemnation. However, your earthly life will get worse. At least you have my son. That is a better price than anything of this world. GET USED TO IT. Because you accepted my son, the world hates you, and you'll never win on earth. But HOLD TO THAT PROMISE IN HEAVEN! It's good.

...essentially, I traded my success, my dreams, and my desires...for faith in some person who apparently 'died' for us for this 'eternal life'.

Personally...I think I got ripped off.
What say you?

 

[prodigal]

Was looking for these people who had this blessed life in the new testament, John the baptist, nah he lost his head, Jesus, dont think so was crucified. how about stephen, oh no he was stoned to death. Peter, nope again crucified upside down. Paul, no again he'd been beat up, stoned a few times, shipwrecked and not the most pleasant death. My point being where did you get the idea of a blessed easy life. we are promised peace in adverse circumstances if we unconditionally search for the kingdom of god, seek first thee the kingdom of god and all these things shall be given unto you. God loves us unconditionally and that truly manifests in our life when we love god the same. Someone once said the secret of life was finding contentment in whatever situation you find yourself in. knowing Jesus isn't salvation, just ask the devil. Giving your life to Jesus is letting him rule in your heart, ultimately your desires and gods desire for your life will match up.

 

[kenthomas27]

I trust that.

I still believe, even though I shouldn't, or dont want to.
"What has been seen...cannot be unseen".

I believe I have seen Jesus, I know him, and he knows me. I believe the son of man came to die for our sins. I think, because of this, I am now obligated to accept, and deal with the crap God gives me. It's like "Ok, Fun. You've accepted my son as LORD. Well done. You have saved your soul from condemnation. However, your earthly life will get worse. At least you have my son. That is a better price than anything of this world. GET USED TO IT. Because you accepted my son, the world hates you, and you'll never win on earth. But HOLD TO THAT PROMISE IN HEAVEN! It's good.

...essentially, I traded my success, my dreams, and my desires...for faith in some person who apparently 'died' for us for this 'eternal life'.

Personally...I think I got ripped off.
What say you?

What success did you trade? What dreams or desires did you sacrifice? I truly don't understand what you've given up. You shouldn't have sacrificed anything! This is the message I had hoped you came away with. It is NOTHING that you're doing that is earning this life with God! It's His Grace.

 

[tourist]

I trust that.

I still believe, even though I shouldn't, or dont want to.
"What has been seen...cannot be unseen".

I believe I have seen Jesus, I know him, and he knows me. I believe the son of man came to die for our sins. I think, because of this, I am now obligated to accept, and deal with the crap God gives me. It's like "Ok, Fun. You've accepted my son as LORD. Well done. You have saved your soul from condemnation. However, your earthly life will get worse. At least you have my son. That is a better price than anything of this world. GET USED TO IT. Because you accepted my son, the world hates you, and you'll never win on earth. But HOLD TO THAT PROMISE IN HEAVEN! It's good.

...essentially, I traded my success, my dreams, and my desires...for faith in some person who apparently 'died' for us for this 'eternal life'.

Personally...I think I got ripped off.
What say you?

Your earthly life will not get worse, you will just have a new perspective on the pertinent matters that God is revealing to you. How you chose to respond to the trials and tribulations is up to you. Take comfort in the fact that God only disciplines those that have love in their heart for Him, desire to know the truth and have the courage to act on their new-found convictions. If you are looking only for instant gratification you have indeed been ripped off. It is time for you to suit up for battle and become a warrior for Christ. As my former first sergeant spoke to me years ago when I was serving in the 101st Airborne Division, "You need to get with the program son!" I once walked in your shoes.

 

[penknight]

I trust that.

I still believe, even though I shouldn't, or dont want to.
"What has been seen...cannot be unseen".

I believe I have seen Jesus, I know him, and he knows me. I believe the son of man came to die for our sins. I think, because of this, I am now obligated to accept, and deal with the crap God gives me. It's like "Ok, Fun. You've accepted my son as LORD. Well done. You have saved your soul from condemnation. However, your earthly life will get worse. At least you have my son. That is a better price than anything of this world. GET USED TO IT. Because you accepted my son, the world hates you, and you'll never win on earth. But HOLD TO THAT PROMISE IN HEAVEN! It's good.

...essentially, I traded my success, my dreams, and my desires...for faith in some person who apparently 'died' for us for this 'eternal life'.

Personally...I think I got ripped off.
What say you?

Human logic sucks dude, it always has and it always will.

Seems like you forgot that satan is that one who wants you destroyed. God doesn't you anything, we ALL OWE HIM.
It's choice to deny Jesus, so if you want to you can, but God wouldn't want it that way. Reading about what the disciples went through should have been a read flag for you. We have to endure these tests for spiritual refinement, which is like a muscle you have to build up. If you don't build it up you get weak. Get real, God isn't a liar, you're just mad because you're not getting what you want from Him which probably comes from lack of faith. Please save any stories about how you kept your faith for so long because I'm not buying it. How dare you be so cold, with those childesh declarations of yours.

What the point of telling us? Do you want a cookie or something? Don't younger christians use this website too? Do you have any idea about the damage you could cause them? Apparently not because you're too absorbed in this selfish rant of yours.

Stop being so willful,, and impatient. Just slow down and open your heart. Let go of that other because it'll profit you nothing.

 

[TaylorTG]

Clothe yourselves in compassion and gentleness, so you will shine as lights in the world.



Galatians 6:1-5
[SUP]1[/SUP]Brothers, if one is detected in sin, you who live by the spirit should gently set him right, each of you trying to avoid falling into temptation yourself.
[SUP]
2[/SUP]Help carry one another's burdens; you will fulfil the law of God.

[SUP]3[/SUP]If anyone thinks he amounts to something, when in fact he is nothing, he is deceives himself.

[SUP]4[/SUP]Each man should watch his/her own conduct, boasting should be a result of one's own achievements.

[SUP]5[/SUP]Everyone should bear his own responsibility.

Human logic sucks dude, it always has and it always will.

Seems like you forgot that satan is that one who wants you destroyed. God doesn't you anything, we ALL OWE HIM.
It's choice to deny Jesus, so if you want to you can, but God wouldn't want it that way. Reading about what the disciples went through should have been a read flag for you. We have to endure these tests for spiritual refinement, which is like a muscle you have to build up. If you don't build it up you get weak. Get real, God isn't a liar, you're just mad because you're not getting what you want from Him which probably comes from lack of faith. Please save any stories about how you kept your faith for so long because I'm not buying it. How dare you be so cold, with those childesh declarations of yours.

What the point of telling us? Do you want a cookie or something? Don't younger christians use this website too? Do you have any idea about the damage you could cause them? Apparently not because you're too absorbed in this selfish rant of yours.

Stop being so willful,, and impatient. Just slow down and open your heart. Let go of that other because it'll profit you nothing.

 

[penknight]

Clothe yourselves in compassion and gentleness, so you will shine as lights in the world.



Galatians 6:1-5
[SUP]1[/SUP]Brothers, if one is detected in sin, you who live by the spirit should gently set him right, each of you trying to avoid falling into temptation yourself.
[SUP]
2[/SUP]Help carry one another's burdens; you will fulfil the law of God.

[SUP]3[/SUP]If anyone thinks he amounts to something, when in fact he is nothing, he is deceives himself.

[SUP]4[/SUP]Each man should watch his/her own conduct, boasting should be a result of one's own achievements.

[SUP]5[/SUP]Everyone should bear his own responsibility.

Thank you. I guess I need a long break from this website, I might burst a heart vessel if I don't. I just can't can deal with people like him right now.

 

[TaylorTG]

(Some of you know me from chat).

Hello.

At this moment, I feel done. Apparently, to follow the cross is to deny everything of comfort of this world. To follow Jesus...is not something I enjoy, or find happiness in. To me, following Jesus...has become a form of spiritual prison for me

Nurturing a proper relationship with God does indeed involve much sacrifice on our part.

How can a 'loving' LORD deny his followers the peace he promised? How does that make God different than a politician or a thief?

It's true that God breaks his promises, but he breaks them if we break ours first. The israelites during the times of the old Testament, especially during the times of the book of Judges, continuously broke their national covenant with the Lord, and so the same Lord was freed of his obligations to them: promises of long life and rest.

Covenant between God and Israel


God the father
If you faithfully obey the commandments I enjoin upon you, you'll have plenty of food, wealth, and children.

If you ruthlessly break the commandments I enjoin upon you, then prepare to eat your own offspring when your cities are put under siege.



Israelites
We promise to obey the commandments you enjoin upon us, oh great King of the Earth, the one, true, mighty God.

May your name be blessed forever and ever!

May we worship you alone, all the days of the Earth. You, who saved us by an old Man's hand, (Moses) who brought us into a land flowing with milk and honey, and who granted us rest on all sides, is an awesome God, who controls the Seas and rules the highest Heavens, who smites the wicked and carries the Just.

You shall be blessed forever and ever!


*Some time later*


King Solomon gets a thousand pagan wives, The Israelites sacrifice their offspring via fire, they make persons who are not of the tribe of Levi priests.



God the father
Ass*oles.

 

[TaylorTG]

Thank you. I guess I need a long break from this website, I might burst a heart vessel if I don't. I just can't can deal with people like him right now.

No point staying here if it will make you commit suicide.

 

[Animus]

...essentially, I traded my success, my dreams, and my desires...for faith in some person who apparently 'died' for us for this 'eternal life'.

Personally...I think I got ripped off.
What say you?

Why did you have to trade your success, dreams, and desires? This would only be the case if they were sinful, which means that they are morally wrong. It is not as though God just chooses what is a sin at random; the moral law is an absolute, it is a part of reality in the same way the multiplication table is. I hope that most of us would agree that if our success was in, say, human trafficking, dreams in adultery, and desires in lust, that we would agree that we were in the wrong and that God was in the right for asking us to give up those things. But I think this example is likely far from what you are experiencing, so I am wondering, what sins did you give up that you wished you held on to?

 

[penknight]

No point staying here if it will make you commit suicide.

You got the wrong idea, I just need to stay off this website for a while.

 

[secularhermit]

Hi, funrider!

If you had a gun to shoot at Jesus, what would you kill from him?

Is Jesus controlling you or is it you who regret being surrendered to God, Jesus or those things Christianity expects from you?

Though I can be biterly disappointed, I know the price of many things (and the best cannot be bought being an unbeliever).

Just dicern what the lying spirit: Yours (a) or the world´s (b), because I have been there, and I hope God 8or Jesus) help you leave that pit you seemed you are.

May the Almighthy ONE pay attention to that emptiness you feel: That´s bitterness for unachieving something you largely longed.

Cheer up! And pray for you, please.

 

[RickyZ]

The problem is in thinking that God is doing these things to you. The minute you accept Christ, the enemy paints a big red bulls-eye over your heart. satan is the ruler of this world, he's the one who afflicts and cheats you. The peace God promises isn't for this world - it's to be found in the next. Think you've been attacked? I could tell you stories that would spin your head. Sure the cesspool looks deep and endless here, but in the next world, this will be but a very short forgotten memory. Frankly, these days when I get attacked, I laugh and say I wouldn't have it any other way. Because the harder the enemy beats on me, the more I figure I'm doing right by God.

Hang in there. God is not your enemy, nor is he the one giving you grief.

 

[TaylorTG]

You got the wrong idea, I just need to stay off this website for a while.

You know that one of your heart vessels might burst if you don't take a break, hence why not taking a break would be suicidal.

 

[penknight]

You know that one of your heart vessels might burst if you don't take a break, hence why not taking a break would be suicidal.

I don't actually have a heart condition or anything like that. I only said to show that I'm not going to allow people like him to get me upset. I'd rather justleave this website fot good then let people like him make me mad. But, I'm just leaving for a while. I'll try to work on my issues.

 

[cinder]

(Some of you know me from chat).

I'm seriously about to deny Jesus, right this very moment. Jesus didn't do crap for me. This whole "dying on the cross" thing...supposedly it was to save the human race, but I dont see myself saved, NOR DO I SEE A RETURN ON INVESTMENT FOR BELIEVING IN HIM.

It was a waste of my time, and I'm not sure why I even bother. YOU TELL ME...what's the point of Jesus. All I care about is a minimum of a strong six-figure income to provide for my family, a business I can grow, a family I can love, and the luxuries needed to ensure my children do not have to suffer "God's test", or whatever *edited* God justifies as a suffering of love. If God cant provide this, I DONT NEED HIM EVER.

Period.

But you tell me...why should I continue putting my faith in a lying spirit?

I don't know your story, but I'm quite astounded by what you said. Your profile says you only became a believer last year. You think God has lied to you because within the past year he has not given you a 6 figure income and your own business and family? You are only 25 (if the age displayed is right). You think the Christian life is supposed to bring freedom from suffering? God never promised such things in the Bible. There are some great books out there that give a Christian perspective on suffering and pain. I can think of both CS Lewis' the problem of pain (which I haven't read but you pretty much can't go wrong with Lewis) and John Piper's excellent chapter on the grace of suffering in his book future grace.

We are in a war, there is an enemy and there is opposition. That is the truth of the Christian life. Why God allows such things to be is far too long of a topic for a forum post. But before you run out on God, get around some poor believers and those who actually have to suffer for their faith. Yesterday I talked with a friend who's father told her to get out, she wasn't his daughter anymore when she told him she had become a Christian. That was 10 years ago or so. I've heard people speak for whom following Christ has meant imprisonment, discrimination, and completely being cut off from their family. How much have you really suffered and how much have you just hit a rough point of disappointment because things aren't going as you wanted them to?

But here's the good news. That friend whose father disowned her; her father recently decided to follow Jesus which was an answer to years of her prayers. Those people who speak about their sufferings for Christ; they are some of the most joyful alive people you will ever meet. Many have a heart to go back and minister to the very people who inflicted their suffering. And me, in my 30's with no real career, limited income, living on the other side of the world because my Lord has asked it of me. I too can say it is so absolutely worth it to give all of that up for the joy of my Lord. It's worth it even on the really crappy lonely feels like nothing is going right days.

Please remember you are still very young in the faith. Jesus told a story about a farmer sowing seed. Some of the seed fell on rocky soil and sprang up quickly, but withered and died in the heat because its roots couldn't go deep. He said that those were the people who received God's word with joy, but when trials came they fell away because they had no root. This is a season where you will either let God root you in the faith, or you will just give up and add it to your list of I tried it but it didn't work (i.e. it didn't get me what I wanted). Hang in there brother and feel free to PM me if there are specific instances in your life that are causing you to struggle or verses in the Bible that seem like lies. What you have posted is vague enough that no one really knows what you are actually going through beyond disappointment and frustration.

 

[Funrider]

...I've stopped expecting things from God. If something good is gonna happen in my life, it's up to me, and I cant trust God to deliver. He sent Jesus to die for our sins. I guess that's the extent of it.

I figured God could do more, but apparently, that's not the case. I still have a whole life ahead of me to live, experience, and enjoy the good things in life. To give it up for the next 40-80 years living in a pipe dream about "An eternal next life" isn't fair, isn't right, isn't cool, and isn't worth my, or anyone else's time.

My goal is to be successful in life. If living a Christian life INTERFERES with that Goal, then no thank you, you can keep Jesus for yourself. If it does NOT INTERFERE, then I am submissive and open to live better in Christ. If I am doomed to live broke, powerless, and destitute for the name of some ideal, FORGET IT. But If I can prosper WITH Jesus, show me how.

That is all.

 

[Funrider]

Had time to absorb the frustration during my time to work. Ironically, ended up reading a good portion of the book of Judges. Gideon, in particular, gave me hope. The fact that a poor farmboy from a poor family...called by God to lead the Israelites to prevail against the Midianites, the Canaanites, the Perizzites, and all other pagan tribes.

...at once, I have hope God can bring a person to glory.
Then, I wonder "Does that still happen?"

EDIT: Also, @bridget: Sorry for the bad words. Didn't mean to. <3