lav-
*that it stands for ' lavatory. '
have the decency to observe the country i come from, just as i can take the time to recognize where you live and the intercultural communications i should be aware of for our relating to make sense and be dignified and polite.
i live in the u.s. we do not call bathrooms or restrooms lavatories here.
chat-
*that because i am in chat, i must want to chat or should be obligated to do so. ( goes for answering p.m.'s as well. )
*that because i am logged into chat, i am actually ' in ' chat... sitting at my computer.
*that because i am in chat i must automatically want to go on mic or video or be obligated to do so.
live in the u.s.-
*i must automatically be a closed minded nationalist
*i like living here
*i like/enjoy all of our culture and customs
not a regular on the forums-
*i must then have nothing worthwhile to contribute, have 0 personality and am nothing but a lifeless, dismissible, boring as cardboard cyborg behind a computer that should obviously be ostracized and ignored for the satisfaction and ease of those in the regular forum clique.
*that i don't have feelings
introvert-
*because i don't pick up the phone, call you back or answer an e mail or text message at great length *immediately* means that i don't want to be, am not interested in your life or no longer want to be your friend.
CHILL.
*that because i'm not speaking, i'm not thinking and/or don't have potentially valuable input.
not a rapid speaker/communicator-
*that i lack intelligence
*should be deemed socially awkward
i like to breathe in between sentences
people don't have to fight to find words and talk on top of one another to communicate effectively
i like feeling calm and communicating in a thoughtful way
i like to think about things before i say them... sometimes : )
*that because i don't charge ahead and interject in my communications that i have nothing to add and am socially defective
right brained-
*equates an inherently lesser, more inadequate or useful form of intelligence
come from a history of abusive relationships-
*that i feel sorry for myself
*that i'm weak.
multiple sources of research on abuse... more often than not, have evidence and information to support the fact that abusive individuals choose strong personalities so they have a ' game ' to play and find stimulation and and feel a sick satisfaction in breaking a strong person's personality down. typically these are true, textbook psychopaths who find enjoyment in gaslighting someone and being an active participant in the destruction of an individual of strong character. it is more a satisfying challenge for them to destroy someone with a strong will, there is no game in praying on ' weaker ' personalities. they've already ' won ' in those cases... and it normally isn't stimulating enough for their twisted psychology.
-only child
* that i enjoy being an only child.
i have always wanted brothers and sisters my whole life.
-aspire to do well at a job
* somehow equates to me wanting to climb the ladder or usurp other's positions.
just because i want to do well so things can run smoothly in the workplace, does not mean that i want to snatch someone's long earned and coveted position from them. i have a certain amount of integrity and respect for seniority and order, thank you.
-do not excel in math
*all my teachers were shining examples of their chosen field and excellent math teachers. that it is/was my fault that i didn't absorb their lightning fast, inconsiderate propensity to interact with only the brightest and most naturally gifted and naturally inclined students of mathematics... who already knew all the answers and because they did, that therefore meant that the whole class understood, was all caught up and that we should then briskly move on to the next lesson.
*that i should have soaked all of the information of my weakest subject up like a sponge and that i wasn't paying attention if i had a question to ask. that that made me a drag and waste of time and space for helpful guidance, instruction and much needed respect and attention.
i am not unintelligent because of this. just because i'm not naturally inclined to linear left-brained thinking, does not mean i am ' less than ' someone who is.
-female
*that i don't like the idea of submission to or respecting male authority.
i crave the godly guidance of good male role models.
*that because i believe in certain rights and respect for women, i don't respect the opposite sex or appreciate an old fashioned gentleman and/or gentlemanly acts of kindness towards women ( such as opening doors, pulling out chairs... etc. )
*that i do not like women...
in fact, i am scared of most women. they often intimidate me and i find them hard to trust or relate to more often than not. i am always afraid of being rejected by women and girls. they can be mean and cliqueish and downright uncaring from most of my personal experiences. not to say that all are this way... it's just the majority of exposures i've had, haven't been very supportive or encouraging or long lasting. i've had far too many ' mean girl ' experiences, especially in early adolescence.
i've had numerous ' friendships ' where the other female was very bossy, dominating and controlling. it feels like they wanted to act a more worldly and knowledgeable individual and that i somehow needed another ' mother ' in my life. they seemed to want to diminish my right to independence and assertiveness and downplay the fact that i am an adult and can properly think for myself. why ? i don't know.
maybe it's my fault,... but i tend to feel more comfortable around males. this, however doesn't mean i wish that this were the case. i'd like to feel equally comfortable around both genders. i don't.
*that i follow trends and love to throw out and waste money on the latest fashions
*that i should want always have my freaking nails painted
*that i like wearing dresses and skirts all the time
*that i aspire to maintaining high maintenance hair that i must spend an hour or more washing, drying and straightening or curling every day. that i feel ' less than ' if i don't do these things
*that i don't enjoy hard work or physical labor
*that because i do, i should be a threat to males when i can basically pull the same weight as many do or can
*that this means i am a woman out of touch with my own femininity and that i could possibly be out of my mind or a potential lesbian for enjoying these things
*that i don't like dirt, hiking, camping or the wilderness
*that just because i enjoy being comfortable and more simple and ' natural ' most of the time, that means i don't embrace my femininity or doing girly things when *i* want to appreciate or do them... ( that i enjoy doing these things when or because a male would prefer or suggest that i do. ) *yuck*! what a lifeless, stepford, soul sucking way to live... to sacrifice my preferences and moods to suit a male's interpretation of what i should be or do to satisfy them with my outward appearance. )
-loyal, open, forgiving and kind
*means i'm weak or equates to frailty
' do not mistake my kindness for weakness ' ( paraphrased -lauryn hill. )
*that emotional honesty and vulnerability or honesty of any kind mean that i am naive and have no boundaries or strength.
* that my openness and ability to share, or vulnerability is a ticket or invitation for an overflow of condescending, misunderstanding, unwise unsolicited advice and/or guidance from just about anyone on the planet
*that i am overly impressionable, naive or immature
tall-
*i must love being tall in all circumstances.
*i am somehow unfairly blessed and gifted for this physical quality and it should make life easy. ( seems silly to bring up, but you might be surprised. )
-manic depression
( manic depression is a mood disorder... it does not equate to someone lacking sanity, self-awareness, logical thought processe or rational perspective. )
*that i am capable of misusing a gun or weapon and turning it on a group of people in a mall or any person or living thing. *that i am a weapon wielding, unstable lunatic.
*that i would ever hurt or harm someone spiritually, psychologically, emotionally or physically.
i detest guns and weapons and have a respectful fear of them. i have never in my life harmed myself or anyone else physically and will never *ever* do so, but for the exception that another is attempting to harm, hurt or kill myself or someone else and cause potentially life or bodily threatening irrevocable damage. in that case i would most likely try to do something to stop an individual that is this out of control, aggressive and dangerous.
*that God will never heal me of this illness that was caused by multiple traumas, abuse and therefore resulted in ptsd. that i will have it my whole life.
maybe i don't even have it at all
*that medication for the help of stability and/or to help chronic depression is always a bad thing that doctors and pharmaceutical companies push for their own benefit
*that continued, life-long medication is always necessary or even beneficial
*that continued, life-long medication is never necessary or beneficial
*that someone who uses disability has chosen to automatically to be a useless, lifeless sponge and therefore a detestable leach on society, the system and government.
*that depression ( and anhedonia, grief... etc. ) are made up illnesses because you can't see them, and that someone who has them should ' pull themselves up by their own bootstraps, get over their past, move on and stop babying themselves and being lazy. '
mental illness has scientifically, peer-reviewed sound evidence which points inarguably to concrete biological and psychological factors. mental illness is as real as juvenile diabetes. don't believe me ? video by stanford professor :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOAgplgTxfc&feature=player_embedded
