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I really do need to write a manual for helping people deal with me. Here's the entry for when you want to hang out with cinder:
I don't do the whole go out or hang out just to go out or hang out thing, please have a purpose for our get together even if it is watching a movie, talking about a specific topic, or playing games.
Do not call me the day of and ask me an open ended what do you want to do. It's nice that you want my company but put in the effort to come up with a couple options if you want to hang out so badly.
Do not invite a lot of other friends to come along without asking me, if your request was to hang out with me. I am highly introverted and disappear in groups. I will also resent the fact that you invited me to hang out but then brought along a whole lot of other people to hang out with that you will spend most of your time interacting with, though I will probably be too nice to say so.
Yep just dealing with some of the frustrations of being an introvert in a communal culture. As you were internet, now I have to go out and hang out with people that I am mildly annoyed at.
I don't do the whole go out or hang out just to go out or hang out thing, please have a purpose for our get together even if it is watching a movie, talking about a specific topic, or playing games.
Do not call me the day of and ask me an open ended what do you want to do. It's nice that you want my company but put in the effort to come up with a couple options if you want to hang out so badly.
Do not invite a lot of other friends to come along without asking me, if your request was to hang out with me. I am highly introverted and disappear in groups. I will also resent the fact that you invited me to hang out but then brought along a whole lot of other people to hang out with that you will spend most of your time interacting with, though I will probably be too nice to say so.
Yep just dealing with some of the frustrations of being an introvert in a communal culture. As you were internet, now I have to go out and hang out with people that I am mildly annoyed at.
P
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I hate. hate. hate. cooking on an electric stove. I mean, I hate cooking at all, but it just makes it so much worse when I'm trying so hard to get water to boil on the back burner, and it's just not happening, and I've turned the heat up as far as it will go, and I start smelling this odd aroma...something very similar to burning plastic. And I finally realize...
I've turned on the front burner AND set the oven mitt on it.
I arr intellijint.
I've turned on the front burner AND set the oven mitt on it.
I arr intellijint.
It's kind of hard, being through what I've been through and trying to get it out of my head that all guys are the same.
I know my fiancé is nothing like my ex-husband, but there's still a little bit of degradation that comes from my previous marriage. I can't get past it because ever since then, I've felt like garbage, something people just throw away or don't value very much. It hurts me to see that I'm undermining myself, and that through that, I'm hurting my fiancé by subconsciously telling myself I've always been garbage and he's not going to accept me either. He's already accepted me, but part of me doesn't believe him.
I know that God accepts me just the way I am. He's never not accepted me, but God is also my father in heaven, what good parent doesn't accept their children? God is flawless and knows me, he loves me, and I know that. But I'm while God will be the 3rd party to my marriage, and while I'm marrying the man I've always dreamed of... I know he has flaws, and I know I have flaws. I'm scared that my fiancé won't like me in some way, or that he'll take me for granted and throw me away someday. That's the way it's always been for me, even when I was little, people who should have loved and cared for me have thrown me away, or badly mistreated me.
I know that people are flawed. I know that some people's definition of love is flawed. I don't know what it feels like to be completely accepted. I don't know what it's like to be loved in every way, no matter what — not from a person anyway.
I know that my fiancé loves me, I'm just scared that I don't know how to accept it because I've never felt it before. I don't know how not to be scared that he might hurt me like I've been hurt before.
I sincerely hope I can protect my children from this kind of fear and uncertainty. I want my children to know what love is and that they can accept it. That people won't hurt them, and to avoid those who will. I want my children to be happy and to live better lives than I have.
I know my fiancé is nothing like my ex-husband, but there's still a little bit of degradation that comes from my previous marriage. I can't get past it because ever since then, I've felt like garbage, something people just throw away or don't value very much. It hurts me to see that I'm undermining myself, and that through that, I'm hurting my fiancé by subconsciously telling myself I've always been garbage and he's not going to accept me either. He's already accepted me, but part of me doesn't believe him.
I know that God accepts me just the way I am. He's never not accepted me, but God is also my father in heaven, what good parent doesn't accept their children? God is flawless and knows me, he loves me, and I know that. But I'm while God will be the 3rd party to my marriage, and while I'm marrying the man I've always dreamed of... I know he has flaws, and I know I have flaws. I'm scared that my fiancé won't like me in some way, or that he'll take me for granted and throw me away someday. That's the way it's always been for me, even when I was little, people who should have loved and cared for me have thrown me away, or badly mistreated me.
I know that people are flawed. I know that some people's definition of love is flawed. I don't know what it feels like to be completely accepted. I don't know what it's like to be loved in every way, no matter what — not from a person anyway.
I know that my fiancé loves me, I'm just scared that I don't know how to accept it because I've never felt it before. I don't know how not to be scared that he might hurt me like I've been hurt before.
I sincerely hope I can protect my children from this kind of fear and uncertainty. I want my children to know what love is and that they can accept it. That people won't hurt them, and to avoid those who will. I want my children to be happy and to live better lives than I have.
i just ordered peaches from the local grower. last season i skipped putting up peaches, and missed them all year long. this year, i'm going to end up doing probably too much, probably as a reactionary gesture.
which means, i'll be eating peaches three meals a day for probably awhile. : D or at least until i can close the door on my freezer...
i can.hardly.wait.
i wish i could find a way to preserve watermelon too. it's sort of awful that i can't have this in the winter. and no, i don't want pickled watermelon rinds. ewwwwwww.
last year i took a few watermelons, juiced them, and froze that. it served as the basis for a lot of tasty beverages. : )
which means, i'll be eating peaches three meals a day for probably awhile. : D or at least until i can close the door on my freezer...
i can.hardly.wait.
i wish i could find a way to preserve watermelon too. it's sort of awful that i can't have this in the winter. and no, i don't want pickled watermelon rinds. ewwwwwww.
last year i took a few watermelons, juiced them, and froze that. it served as the basis for a lot of tasty beverages. : )
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Emmy, if you don't end up being able to get a visa, PLEASE move out of your parents' house anyway. Seriously, they've been incredibly emotionally abusive to you. I didn't realize it until you quoted some of the things your mother has said to you (such as "shut up and buy me dinner"). I realize that it's hard to blow them off, since they're your parents, but PLEASE find another place to stay if you end up staying in your current country. I love you, Emily. I think basically everyone here does, and wants to see you leave this abusive relationship; it doesn't have to be a bf/gf relationship to be an abusive one. Parents can be abusers as well...
sigh. SO NOT CRUNCHY. hahaahaahaaa.
i just happen to like my own, unsugary, tree-ripened frozen peaches. they're just superior to the stuff i've seen drenched in sludge and who knows what else. plus, it's so much cheaper. they appeal to both my picky/particular-ness, AND my practical side. i can buy no-spray tree-ripe peaches for about $.70/lb (less if i pick them myself, which i often do) and that's a pittance of what it would cost to buy them.
if you've never had delightfully fresh peaches in the middle of a gray winter, you're missing out. : )
in the past, i've been rather tempted to try the watermelon jam, but everything i've seen for watermelon jam depends upon a TON of sugar, probably because watermelon is mostly water, and you need something to hold it together. so, a puree or juice seems to be a better use of the product. and i'm not much for sugary-sweet stuff.
i also love to juice rhubarb. both that and watermelon make incredibly refreshing beverages, added to club soda or tea. and ginger. plus they all freeze well.
so. not. crunchy! : D
i just happen to like my own, unsugary, tree-ripened frozen peaches. they're just superior to the stuff i've seen drenched in sludge and who knows what else. plus, it's so much cheaper. they appeal to both my picky/particular-ness, AND my practical side. i can buy no-spray tree-ripe peaches for about $.70/lb (less if i pick them myself, which i often do) and that's a pittance of what it would cost to buy them.
if you've never had delightfully fresh peaches in the middle of a gray winter, you're missing out. : )
in the past, i've been rather tempted to try the watermelon jam, but everything i've seen for watermelon jam depends upon a TON of sugar, probably because watermelon is mostly water, and you need something to hold it together. so, a puree or juice seems to be a better use of the product. and i'm not much for sugary-sweet stuff.
i also love to juice rhubarb. both that and watermelon make incredibly refreshing beverages, added to club soda or tea. and ginger. plus they all freeze well.
so. not. crunchy! : D
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It's tourist's fault. Look at what he posted in the bible discussion thread about losing motivation to post in the bible argument forum:
Our secret is getting out guys. People (and trolls) might come running when they find out we actually manage to be supportive of each other and have a good community.
Don't know if it will make you feel better but those of us with good lives have similar concerns about not being accepted if someone knew all our flaws as well. The secret is not not being scared; the secret is to do it anyway even when you are scared that opening yourself up will lead to you being hurt or taken advantage of because it is worth the risk. Imperfect people have been making marriage work for a long time now so I'm sure it will work out great. Big hugs and congratulations.
Our secret is getting out guys. People (and trolls) might come running when they find out we actually manage to be supportive of each other and have a good community.
Don't know if it will make you feel better but those of us with good lives have similar concerns about not being accepted if someone knew all our flaws as well. The secret is not not being scared; the secret is to do it anyway even when you are scared that opening yourself up will lead to you being hurt or taken advantage of because it is worth the risk. Imperfect people have been making marriage work for a long time now so I'm sure it will work out great. Big hugs and congratulations.