Why am I having so much of a problem getting a good Christian girlfriend?
- Thread starter dothackzero
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Just throwing out there though.... I love my babyfat. I love watching my friends play video games and reading comic books. I have picked that over the buff SAS man I used to be. Lol. I want a woman who'll love me for me, I'll work out again for her (with her) once we are together but if she wouldn't accept me as I am now she's not tge woman I want to be with anyway. Superficiality sucks hardcore.
What matters is being happy and sure in yourself
What matters is being happy and sure in yourself
Dothack dude, the only thing I ever seen you say in the chatroom is, "I have waited 6 years, I have no friends who are girls" and you keep repeating that over and over. I am trying to help you out here.
This website is full of good people and good Christian girls, try talking in the chatroom about something other than how much it sucks that you don't have a gf, and you will see a major improvement. Trust me.
You are interested in different things, talk about them in the chat like everyone else does.
This website is full of good people and good Christian girls, try talking in the chatroom about something other than how much it sucks that you don't have a gf, and you will see a major improvement. Trust me.
You are interested in different things, talk about them in the chat like everyone else does.
S
Dothack, this may sound like something that Doctor Phil would say, but unless you are at ease with yourself, most girls (Christian or otherwise) will not be at ease when they are around you...
I know that some of the posts here have talked about one getting ripped in order to get attention from women - all I can say is that it may get you attention, but not the Godly kind that you may be looking for in a woman.
By all means pray about it, but I would also recommend that in addition to what Eugenious said, begin to look for ways as to how you can work on your own behaviours, attitudes and thinking. There are ways of doing it. I know because I spent a good long time searching for them - finding them after around ten years, and the result was confidence with women - both on the internet and in person.
There is a book on Amazon called ''The Sedona Method'' - this I recommend wholeheartedly as a way to work with negative/limited thinking as well as any emotional blocks. If you want to succeed in life, prayer alone isn't enough - you have to take some action towards the things you wish to have - whether they materialize or not.
Good luck
~R
I know that some of the posts here have talked about one getting ripped in order to get attention from women - all I can say is that it may get you attention, but not the Godly kind that you may be looking for in a woman.
By all means pray about it, but I would also recommend that in addition to what Eugenious said, begin to look for ways as to how you can work on your own behaviours, attitudes and thinking. There are ways of doing it. I know because I spent a good long time searching for them - finding them after around ten years, and the result was confidence with women - both on the internet and in person.
There is a book on Amazon called ''The Sedona Method'' - this I recommend wholeheartedly as a way to work with negative/limited thinking as well as any emotional blocks. If you want to succeed in life, prayer alone isn't enough - you have to take some action towards the things you wish to have - whether they materialize or not.
Good luck
~R
T
hello,just read your compliant bout the huh...hving no girlfriend at 20?? maybe I don't have to elaborate that God really has som1 special 4 you..you'll know her at the right time my friend..I think GOD just want you 2 intrust your "LOVE LIFE" 2 Him..cuz when you surrender it to Jesus everything will be given 2 you at the perfect time...He knws His plan for you...meanwhile follow the Lord on what He wants you 2 do..Put Him 1st in your life...Don't 4get 2 read the BIBLE..God bless...
M
dothackzero:
I didn't read all of the other responses, so forgive me if someone already said this.
Based on what you have written in responses to all of this it would seem like(correct me if I'm wrong) that you are trying to have a better relationship with God by doing good things or holding on to good moral standards. While there is some reward in doing good things, it is really easy to fall under the curse of the law that Paul describes in Romans 7 and 8. When your relationship with God is based on what you do, and you feel like you have to earn your way into God's good graces, you have a relationship under the law and not under Grace.
There is absolutely nothing you can do that would increase the Love that God has for you now. The other good news is that God's Love for you in incomprehensible. I know it may not be obvious, but when you put that list of things up, some of the items seem to be to try to gain approval from other people. It seems like you are measuring your relationships based on what you do, rather than purposing to grow in love in the relationship.
People who have performance-oriented relationships with other people have a tendency to have the same kind of relationship with God. It is the most natural thing for people who are so used to approaching relationships this way. But God does not honor performance-oriented relationships because Jesus died on the cross and already earn God's Grace and favor for you. The standards of God are impossible to keep on your own. Let me say it again. God expectations of you are impossible when you try to fulfill them on your own. The only way to meet these, is by the Holy Spirit. This is why Jesus sent us the Holy Spirit (who is called the Helper and the Counselor).
Because of the blood of Jesus, any favor that you gain from God is completely by Grace. Jesus is the one who did all the right things for you. You are already highly favored by God and Loved by Him. This is the position that born again believers should approach God at all times. So when you approach God, you can pray in confidence that He Loves you and hears you despite what you have done, or didn't do. The blood of Jesus covers sin. But when you come to Him with an attitude of "look at all the things I have in line today, please bless me", then God has to judge you according to the letter of the law. Paul explains this exhaustively in Romans.
The old convenant proved that we as humans can't do it on our own. God obviously realizes this, which is why He sent Jesus to die on the cross for you. The blood of Jesus gives you the righteousness of Christ. When God looks at you He sees you like He sees Jesus.
I am in no way trying to criticize your walk, but I have the hope that at least some of what I wrote to you is helpful to you in your quest to get closer to God. Wrong mindsets about how to approach relationship to God can put heavy burdens on you that God never intended for you. Approach God in prayer like you are currently His beloved son that He is pleased with.
Changing the way you think on this is essential.
God Bless,
Machew
I didn't read all of the other responses, so forgive me if someone already said this.
Based on what you have written in responses to all of this it would seem like(correct me if I'm wrong) that you are trying to have a better relationship with God by doing good things or holding on to good moral standards. While there is some reward in doing good things, it is really easy to fall under the curse of the law that Paul describes in Romans 7 and 8. When your relationship with God is based on what you do, and you feel like you have to earn your way into God's good graces, you have a relationship under the law and not under Grace.
There is absolutely nothing you can do that would increase the Love that God has for you now. The other good news is that God's Love for you in incomprehensible. I know it may not be obvious, but when you put that list of things up, some of the items seem to be to try to gain approval from other people. It seems like you are measuring your relationships based on what you do, rather than purposing to grow in love in the relationship.
People who have performance-oriented relationships with other people have a tendency to have the same kind of relationship with God. It is the most natural thing for people who are so used to approaching relationships this way. But God does not honor performance-oriented relationships because Jesus died on the cross and already earn God's Grace and favor for you. The standards of God are impossible to keep on your own. Let me say it again. God expectations of you are impossible when you try to fulfill them on your own. The only way to meet these, is by the Holy Spirit. This is why Jesus sent us the Holy Spirit (who is called the Helper and the Counselor).
Because of the blood of Jesus, any favor that you gain from God is completely by Grace. Jesus is the one who did all the right things for you. You are already highly favored by God and Loved by Him. This is the position that born again believers should approach God at all times. So when you approach God, you can pray in confidence that He Loves you and hears you despite what you have done, or didn't do. The blood of Jesus covers sin. But when you come to Him with an attitude of "look at all the things I have in line today, please bless me", then God has to judge you according to the letter of the law. Paul explains this exhaustively in Romans.
The old convenant proved that we as humans can't do it on our own. God obviously realizes this, which is why He sent Jesus to die on the cross for you. The blood of Jesus gives you the righteousness of Christ. When God looks at you He sees you like He sees Jesus.
I am in no way trying to criticize your walk, but I have the hope that at least some of what I wrote to you is helpful to you in your quest to get closer to God. Wrong mindsets about how to approach relationship to God can put heavy burdens on you that God never intended for you. Approach God in prayer like you are currently His beloved son that He is pleased with.
Changing the way you think on this is essential.
God Bless,
Machew
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I think God is starting to get me ready for my real friend that's a girl. Okay so there's this girl at the Bible study I goto. She's pretty shy like me, but I've noticed her looking at me and smiling at me, and actually talking to me more then the other guys at the Bible Study. So she might easier to talk to and make friends with right?