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I've been struggling, recently, with my decision to come home, to work on my marriage. It's actually going really well, honestly, but there's times when I remember how...free, and how strong, I sometimes felt, living alone, doing my own thing. Of course I also vividly remember the worst moments, too...but it's funny how even the very darkest times I had don't seem that awful from this side of them. I feel...well, guilty, for wishing I still had what little I had when I left, and I feel terrible that I'm once again doubting myself- my decisions, my commitment to my husband, my ability to do my part to make this work. And it feels all the worse because he's been so wonderful and forgiving and just...completely changed...*sigh* I could really use some prayers right now, if y'all think of it.
Thank you for your honesty, Cris. You are listing all the reasons why I'd be scared to get married again.
When I married my husband, I truly didn't think I could live without him. When he left, I just had to. God nudged me along.
Now that I've been alone for so long, if I got married and let's say he cheated on me, the first thing I'd say wouldn't be, "Let's get counseling," or "Let's try to work it out," like I did with my first marriage. The first thing I'd say is, "You know what? I've lived without you for X number of years and I can do it again. So either you leave, or I will..."
Because once I knew and saw for myself that I COULD make it on my own, now I struggle with the thought of having to stay under any circumstance. In certain situations... being on my own again would just seem easier.
When I married my husband, I truly didn't think I could live without him. When he left, I just had to. God nudged me along.
Now that I've been alone for so long, if I got married and let's say he cheated on me, the first thing I'd say wouldn't be, "Let's get counseling," or "Let's try to work it out," like I did with my first marriage. The first thing I'd say is, "You know what? I've lived without you for X number of years and I can do it again. So either you leave, or I will..."
Because once I knew and saw for myself that I COULD make it on my own, now I struggle with the thought of having to stay under any circumstance. In certain situations... being on my own again would just seem easier.
I'm sorry Cris... Are you guys doing any marriage counseling? I'm praying that the good in your marriage will overwhelm everything else to the point that you don't even think of those extra freedoms you might have had alone.
It's an opossum, but NO ONE ever actually says "opossum". It's always referred to as a "possum". I actually question the wisdom of the person who named the animal. So much more effort to put that "o" at the beginning.
I'm sorry viola, about your friend and brother who has passed away. (And about the infection too. I hope you can shake that!)
I just found out today that a 16 year old girl who once went to school with my kids was killed in a car accident this afternoon. I am so heartbroken for her, for her family, for this unpredictable life. I remember her smiling face when I subbed in her class. She was a chatterbox who never got her work done. I'm sad she will now never have a chance to.
It's an opossum, but NO ONE ever actually says "opossum". It's always referred to as a "possum". I actually question the wisdom of the person who named the animal. So much more effort to put that "o" at the beginning.
I'm sorry viola, about your friend and brother who has passed away. (And about the infection too. I hope you can shake that!)
I just found out today that a 16 year old girl who once went to school with my kids was killed in a car accident this afternoon. I am so heartbroken for her, for her family, for this unpredictable life. I remember her smiling face when I subbed in her class. She was a chatterbox who never got her work done. I'm sad she will now never have a chance to.
I am so sorry to hear of everyone's losses. Viola, I will pray for your sinus infection now.
Father, we give everybody into your hands. Each of us seems to be going through a struggle, a bad news, a sickness, a failure or a pain. Lord, you have not promised us only days of mirth but you have promised to give us the grace that will take us through these days of pain and suffering. You have promised us that you will be with us, walking along every step of our Pilgrim Way. Father, right now, I give each one of my brothers and sisters here who are going through a difficult path. Be with them, Lord. I give Lil into your hands. Help her to have a wonderful birthday and give her the best birthday cake she has made. I give seoul into your hands. Strengthen her body and help her to fight the allergies. I give MissCris into your hands. Help her to find her feet in the relationship with her husband. I give the family of that child which Grace knew. Comfort them and console them, Lord. I give viola into your hands. You be Jehovah Rapha unto her. Do not let that sinus infection worsen. Instead, you can send your healing touch upon her. Heal her and strengthen her.
Lord, be with us all as we continue our Pilgrim Way. I ask that you guide us in every step. I ask that your presence and that your Spirit be with us. All this I ask in Jesus' name, Amen.
Father, we give everybody into your hands. Each of us seems to be going through a struggle, a bad news, a sickness, a failure or a pain. Lord, you have not promised us only days of mirth but you have promised to give us the grace that will take us through these days of pain and suffering. You have promised us that you will be with us, walking along every step of our Pilgrim Way. Father, right now, I give each one of my brothers and sisters here who are going through a difficult path. Be with them, Lord. I give Lil into your hands. Help her to have a wonderful birthday and give her the best birthday cake she has made. I give seoul into your hands. Strengthen her body and help her to fight the allergies. I give MissCris into your hands. Help her to find her feet in the relationship with her husband. I give the family of that child which Grace knew. Comfort them and console them, Lord. I give viola into your hands. You be Jehovah Rapha unto her. Do not let that sinus infection worsen. Instead, you can send your healing touch upon her. Heal her and strengthen her.
Lord, be with us all as we continue our Pilgrim Way. I ask that you guide us in every step. I ask that your presence and that your Spirit be with us. All this I ask in Jesus' name, Amen.
I thought the "riding" typo was pretty cool too!
Could you send me a shipment of snow? I can pay you with sunlight and humidity - quote your price.
Could you send me a shipment of snow? I can pay you with sunlight and humidity - quote your price.
Apparently, what I've learned from a site like Tumblr, genitalia does not determine a person's gender.
I just...
I just...
Either that, or they're trying really hard to get their liberal agenda across to the point that they'd make bogus statements they won't bother questioning because they know if they did they'd see how ridiculous it sounded. I don't mean to sound harsh, but Tumblr for the most part is no self respecting person's land. There are some great accounts on there but they are few and far between.
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On a completely unrelated note...tomorrow, I am going to ask one of my sisters to take me to the local humane society so I can get the ball rolling to volunteer. My job is pretty much close to over. I don't think they like me there anyway. There were a few coworkers that liked me. But...I don't feel right being there anymore. I'd rather do what I love for free and go from there. If I had to find another retail job, then I might. But ultimately my job is ministry. Actual ministry. Yes, you have opportunities to minister everywhere you are. But there's a difference between on the side during your job ministry and making ministry your job, helping those who are helpless, helping those who need healing... That is my heart. I am not the greatest people person, but I am sorta good at giving words of encouragement.
That's great that you have set your sights on Ministry, and its even better than you can come to the realization that one can minister anywhere, sometimes if say your workplace environment makes it difficult to minister...one can minister solely on their actions...you can tell a lot about a person that states he's a Christian by how they are living their lives ya know? I wish you well on your calling!