Hey Everyone,
*I wasn't sure how to "summarize" this one, so I know some people will want to read this and some will see it as being too long.
My thanks in advance to those who want to read and discuss the topic.*
Something I was thinking about today: many of us here in Singles have a variety of different reasons as to why we aren't married. I could list a thousand different reasons and every single one has some validity. Some of the most popular reasons here in the forum seem to be: fear, hurt, rejection, can't find the right person (or any person), wanting to concentrate on other things right now (career, raising children, etc.), and believing that marriage has more negative outcomes than positive.
All of these reasons can be perfectly legitimate. But I couldn't help but ask, if most Christian singles don't get married, who is God calling to create and raise His next generation of believers?
As many here know, I myself am adopted. For whatever reason they had at the time, my birth parents (presumably) put me in a cardboard box and left me in a public place to be found. I was born into a society that sees no use for an unwanted child, except as an object or slave. I am very thankful to God that a young Christian couple in the middle of No
Where's Land, USA, very much wanted that unwanted child.
But what if a Christian couple had not stepped up? What if I had been adopted by two people who were very loving... but gay, and that was the only environment I had known? I can only imagine the stones and hellfire I would be walking through right now from the CHURCH, and not necessarily from God, because He would have understood my situation. Let me also tell you, as someone who went back to her own orphanage as an adult and saw for herself many, many children who will never be adopted, if this would have been MY ONLY CHOICE, I would have surely chosen two gay people who loved me as their own child rather than an institution. I am certainly NOT saying IN ANY WAY that it is God's plan for gay couples to raise the next generation.
BUT at the same time, if so many of us Christian singles aren't, who is God calling to raise the children who are both created and abandoned in order to fill the earth? God has never taken back the command to "Be fruitful and multiply," though that can mean very different things for different people.
The point of my post is this--many of us aren't married because we haven't found the "right" person, situation, or set of benefits that will entices us into getting married. Some of us are waiting for perfect people and perfect situations. Some just haven't found anyone willing to marry them (and I am certainly NOT condoning getting married just to be married or because you're in a rush.) Others are too afraid, hurt, bitter, or just not interested in looking. All of these situations might be acceptable in their own situations. But here are some questions I've been thinking about.
1. Do you think God will simply call together the "right number" of Christian couples to produce (whether on their own or through adoption, etc.) enough human beings to carry us into the future? Will they all be "nearly perfect couples", as we all seem to hope for in our own lives, or do you think they will be marriages purposely called together with a lot of flaws and heartaches?
2. Could God be calling us to what would be very hard marriages, partially in order to learn to trust Him, and partially in order to raise children? I once knew a couple who married in their early 20's. Everyone, including the groom's father, told her not to marry him because he was already a raging alcohol. But at 16 years old, she felt God was calling her to stand by and marry this man. It took 20 years of living hell--suicide attempts, drunken rages, ultimatums and near-divorce--but he finally gave his life to Christ. And, they had a beautiful daughter whom they both loved very much.
3. Instead of marrying, do you believe God is calling many of us singles to adopt, foster children, help raise the families of those around us who are struggling?
I understand that God's will and plans will prevail whether we all marry or not.
But I have to wonder, is the reason many of us aren't married and having families because we are refusing to answer a call into a life that might not have the happily-ever-after story we think we can find if we just hold out long enough? And if we don't answer the call, what will become of the next generation of Christians?
(I am not criticizing anyone for where they are at in life or why. After all, I happen to be one of those people hoping to hold out for a "good" situation! I just thought this might be an interesting topic of discussion.)
*I wasn't sure how to "summarize" this one, so I know some people will want to read this and some will see it as being too long.
My thanks in advance to those who want to read and discuss the topic.*Something I was thinking about today: many of us here in Singles have a variety of different reasons as to why we aren't married. I could list a thousand different reasons and every single one has some validity. Some of the most popular reasons here in the forum seem to be: fear, hurt, rejection, can't find the right person (or any person), wanting to concentrate on other things right now (career, raising children, etc.), and believing that marriage has more negative outcomes than positive.
All of these reasons can be perfectly legitimate. But I couldn't help but ask, if most Christian singles don't get married, who is God calling to create and raise His next generation of believers?
As many here know, I myself am adopted. For whatever reason they had at the time, my birth parents (presumably) put me in a cardboard box and left me in a public place to be found. I was born into a society that sees no use for an unwanted child, except as an object or slave. I am very thankful to God that a young Christian couple in the middle of No
Where's Land, USA, very much wanted that unwanted child.
But what if a Christian couple had not stepped up? What if I had been adopted by two people who were very loving... but gay, and that was the only environment I had known? I can only imagine the stones and hellfire I would be walking through right now from the CHURCH, and not necessarily from God, because He would have understood my situation. Let me also tell you, as someone who went back to her own orphanage as an adult and saw for herself many, many children who will never be adopted, if this would have been MY ONLY CHOICE, I would have surely chosen two gay people who loved me as their own child rather than an institution. I am certainly NOT saying IN ANY WAY that it is God's plan for gay couples to raise the next generation.
BUT at the same time, if so many of us Christian singles aren't, who is God calling to raise the children who are both created and abandoned in order to fill the earth? God has never taken back the command to "Be fruitful and multiply," though that can mean very different things for different people.
The point of my post is this--many of us aren't married because we haven't found the "right" person, situation, or set of benefits that will entices us into getting married. Some of us are waiting for perfect people and perfect situations. Some just haven't found anyone willing to marry them (and I am certainly NOT condoning getting married just to be married or because you're in a rush.) Others are too afraid, hurt, bitter, or just not interested in looking. All of these situations might be acceptable in their own situations. But here are some questions I've been thinking about.
1. Do you think God will simply call together the "right number" of Christian couples to produce (whether on their own or through adoption, etc.) enough human beings to carry us into the future? Will they all be "nearly perfect couples", as we all seem to hope for in our own lives, or do you think they will be marriages purposely called together with a lot of flaws and heartaches?
2. Could God be calling us to what would be very hard marriages, partially in order to learn to trust Him, and partially in order to raise children? I once knew a couple who married in their early 20's. Everyone, including the groom's father, told her not to marry him because he was already a raging alcohol. But at 16 years old, she felt God was calling her to stand by and marry this man. It took 20 years of living hell--suicide attempts, drunken rages, ultimatums and near-divorce--but he finally gave his life to Christ. And, they had a beautiful daughter whom they both loved very much.
3. Instead of marrying, do you believe God is calling many of us singles to adopt, foster children, help raise the families of those around us who are struggling?
I understand that God's will and plans will prevail whether we all marry or not.
But I have to wonder, is the reason many of us aren't married and having families because we are refusing to answer a call into a life that might not have the happily-ever-after story we think we can find if we just hold out long enough? And if we don't answer the call, what will become of the next generation of Christians?
(I am not criticizing anyone for where they are at in life or why. After all, I happen to be one of those people hoping to hold out for a "good" situation! I just thought this might be an interesting topic of discussion.)
