I don't know what to do

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butterfly712

Guest
#1
#1
I have been single since last month,Gary and me have not been together since then,he works full time now,he opens every morning and closes every night,he sent me a text Thursday night asking me if I still wanted to be with him,and if I still have feelings for him,I replied back to him saying that yes I still want to be with him and yes I still have feelings for him,I know I can't wait forever for him,but I can't stop loving him and I can't stop thinking about him no matter how hard I try to,and I know deep down that he can't stop thinking about me and loving me also.
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#2
Feb 21, 2014
70,903
9,638
113
#2
butterfly712 said:
I have been single since last month,Gary and me have not been together since then,he works full time now,he opens every morning and closes every night,he sent me a text Thursday night asking me if I still wanted to be with him,and if I still have feelings for him,I replied back to him saying that yes I still want to be with him and yes I still have feelings for him,I know I can't wait forever for him,but I can't stop loving him and I can't stop thinking about him no matter how hard I try to,and I know deep down that he can't stop thinking about me and loving me also.
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butterfly, if I remember correctly, wasn't it HIM that ended the relationship? You can be apart from a person and still think about and care for them. He told you he didn't want to hurt you, so he shouldn't be calling or texting you and asking you how you still feel about him. I think he's misleading you by giving you hope of a reconciliation. You can't and shouldn't wait forever for him, he's chosen the path he wants to be on right now. He may not be who God intends for you, because God wouldn't send you someone who plays with your emotions like this. You could remain just friends with him, but as far as possibly getting back together, I would urge you not to.
 
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butterfly712

Guest
#3
#3
blue_ladybug said:
butterfly, if I remember correctly, wasn't it HIM that ended the relationship? You can be apart from a person and still think about and care for them. He told you he didn't want to hurt you, so he shouldn't be calling or texting you and asking you how you still feel about him. I think he's misleading you by giving you hope of a reconciliation. You can't and shouldn't wait forever for him, he's chosen the path he wants to be on right now. He may not be who God intends for you, because God wouldn't send you someone who plays with your emotions like this. You could remain just friends with him, but as far as possibly getting back together, I would urge you not to.
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That's very true lady blue,I couldn't agree with you more.
 
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butterfly712

Guest
#4
#4
And I think that his mother was trying to push Gary into asking me to marry him.
 
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MollyConnor

Guest
#5
#5
I think if he's a flaky guy, you shouldn't go for him. I mean he's already hurting you and breaking up with you, can you imagine how much more when you're married and things get tougher? For marriage, you need a man who is going to stick by you through everything: dirty diapers, crying, financial struggles and all!
I hope you find the man God has for you, God bless you sister!
 
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Aspimom

Guest
#6
#6
I know your pain. Two years ago my husband of 10 years asked for a divorce. After I moved out he said he just needed enough time to think then we would get back together. Then he gave me the papers. Two years later I finally moved across the country because I got tired of the back and forth. It took him 6 days to get a new girl friend. I actually got on here tonight because my heart still hurts for him. Be stronger. If he really wants you back he needs to do a grand gesture and not a text. That is the lazy man's way. What ever happen to flowers and chocolates lol. I will pray for you,
 
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mystikmind

Guest
#7
#7
This looks like another example of deceived feelings.... i have seen this so much in life, people who seem so good together, then the deceiver finds a way in somehow, and someone starts doubting their feelings, breaks it off and then later on cannot seem to understand why they did it? Well i will tell you, they allowed wishy washy feelings to deceive them, and this kind of person is no good for a long term relationship, your better off without them.
 
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EdisonTrent

Guest
#8
#8
I've experienced this same thing also and I have come to realize this is a gypsy way of life (a user of the heart). They never will be faithful to you or love you the right way.
 
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Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#9
#9
Universal answer: Don't date ever.

Okay, that might be extreme. As it was Gary's decision to abandon ship, I believe it should be him that initiates reconciliation. It's fine to maintain hope for you two, but I believe it's only fair you keep an open mind and an open heart about exploring future romantic ventures outside of you and Gary. He left, after all; you don't owe him anything.
 
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cmarieh

Guest
#10
#10
If you have been apart for a while it may have given him an opportunity to reflect on your relationship. My recommendation is to find out why the sudden change of heart and from there take it really slow because he needs to prove himself worthy of your trust. But first and foremost pray that God will guide you in this. I will be praying for you.
 
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butterfly712

Guest
#11
#11
Siberian_Khatru said:
Universal answer: Don't date ever.

Okay, that might be extreme. As it was Gary's decision to abandon ship, I believe it should be him that initiates reconciliation. It's fine to maintain hope for you two, but I believe it's only fair you keep an open mind and an open heart about exploring future romantic ventures outside of you and Gary. He left, after all; you don't owe him anything.
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That's very true Siberian Khatru
 
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mystikmind

Guest
#12
#12
Siberian_Khatru said:
Universal answer: Don't date ever.

Okay, that might be extreme. As it was Gary's decision to abandon ship, I believe it should be him that initiates reconciliation. It's fine to maintain hope for you two, but I believe it's only fair you keep an open mind and an open heart about exploring future romantic ventures outside of you and Gary. He left, after all; you don't owe him anything.
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I also think this is very good advice :)
 
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Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#14
#14
butterfly712 said:
yes it is mystikmind I just wish he would stop texting me and playing games.
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Well it's YOUR turn on Words with Friends already!...Oh, you meant Gary. :p
 
MultilingualMessenger

MultilingualMessenger

Senior Member
#16
Jan 27, 2015
2,690
367
83
#16
butterfly712 said:
:p LOL yes Gary,he had the nerve to tell me that he hopes that I'm not seeing anyone new.
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So he leaves you, which indicates he doesn't want you, but he doesn't want you to be with anyone else either? He can't be possessive with what's not his. Eh, cut him off and move on.
 
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butterfly712

Guest
#17
#17
MultilingualMessenger said:
So he leaves you, which indicates he doesn't want you, but he doesn't want you to be with anyone else either? He can't be possessive with what's not his. Eh, cut him off and move on.
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yes,that's what I'm doing but he first asked me if I had a new boyfriend which is none of his business but I didn't tell him that.
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#18
Feb 21, 2014
70,903
9,638
113
#18
butterfly712 said:
yes it is mystikmind I just wish he would stop texting me and playing games.
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The next time he texts you, tell him nicely to stop contacting you. You need a clean break and you can't get it if he's calling and texting you. Remind him that it was HIS choice to leave and now he needs to leave you alone. Even better yet, just ignore his calls and texts.. He will get the hint eventually.
 
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butterfly712

Guest
#19
#19
blue_ladybug said:
The next time he texts you, tell him nicely to stop contacting you. You need a clean break and you can't get it if he's calling and texting you. Remind him that it was HIS choice to leave and now he needs to leave you alone. Even better yet, just ignore his calls and texts.. He will get the hint eventually.
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ok Lady Blue,that is very good advice thanks I will do that,I'm not going to be taking him back.
 
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Nemakiza

Guest
#20
#20
butterfly712 said:
I have been single since last month,Gary and me have not been together since then,he works full time now,he opens every morning and closes every night,he sent me a text Thursday night asking me if I still wanted to be with him,and if I still have feelings for him,I replied back to him saying that yes I still want to be with him and yes I still have feelings for him,I know I can't wait forever for him,but I can't stop loving him and I can't stop thinking about him no matter how hard I try to,and I know deep down that he can't stop thinking about me and loving me also.
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I may sound a killer right???? Why don't you tell him to listen the song "take a bow" by Rihanna

[video=youtube;J3UjJ4wKLkg]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3UjJ4wKLkg[/video]

She will entertain, surely deliver the message though.
 
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