um... i'm a little confused why you would make an overt effort to insert yourself into a matter that you have no part of--which is really not the big deal, as it IS an online thread.
but to ME it came off as intended to spur controversy. not to promote harmony or add value, but what appears to only "stir the pot". if there was any doubt whether to take offense or not, your input helped to secure the offense that was taken--or at least that's how i see it.
when i read garyA's message, i noticed the "honey" that was followed by, "i'm sorry". the statement was a direct reply to a comment kim shared about "being thrown away by her husband". the statement was intended to relay the pain that she felt.
i read his reply to that statement as "i'm sorry kim" with the "honey" at the end to provide a little bit of tenderness, given the painful consequence her statement relayed.
while that might seem odd or less than ideal, i think that we all have a choice to make when we react. we can choose to be easily offended and assume the worst interpretation of statements, or we can look at the effort that has been made in whole to be sensitive, (not to mention the previous statement, clarifying his intent) and simply give people the benefit of the doubt.
in this case, i have a hard time understanding why this is such a difficult concept with our brothers and sisters. we aren't called to treat them as we think they deserve. we are called to treat them according to the standard held to us, from the bible. i can post a bunch of scripture about wholesome and edifying words, loving one another as yourself, bearing one another's burdens, whatever is good and lovely, and the life and death in the power of the tongue... but i have a feeling you guys know them too. : D
my thoughts, as well. if it's our intent to have a productive discussion, we need to stop carrying our frustrations and pain, and use it as a club to hit over people's heads, only further validating their negative perceptions. talking down to people, and making statements rich with inference and mocking do more damage than any good. i have yet to witness a time when the word "arrogance" was well-received.
further, none of these people are the ones who have injured or contributed to your negative impressions of women or men. these are our brothers and sisters in Christ.
they deserve our love, our kindness, and our respect. if we can't fulfill that standard, and keep the integrity of our communication, then it probably shouldn't be said. this is our testimony to the world, and THIS is what the world will view and use as one of many things that will construe their opinions of christians.
By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another. john 13:35
what we say matters. it matters in our homes, in our hearts, in our workplaces, and it matters online, even here, in this thread too. )
this is not to condemn anyone. far from it. and i'm not coming down on anyone in particular. i am just deeply troubled by these kinds of conversations and the damage that they can do. thanks.
