All About Sex?

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Prisca

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The Lord has been really helping me ever since my first blog post on depression. I feel at peace and at ease. All I need prayer with is to focus on Him and not worry about guys right now in my life. There have been great Christian men who have approached me and expressed interest in me... the only problem is that it seems like no matter what, the conversation somehow trails off to a sex-related topic... and this makes me question is this all Christian men-Godly men talk about with Christian women??? I know that statement is not true, but I feel really annoyed.. I just want a guy who will lead me to the Lord and leave the sex talk for marriage ya know?

Like I said, just pray for me to continue guarding my heart and pray also for discernment... thank you in advance.
 
Born again men are very different from "religious" men, o, they can talk very spiritually, talk you to bed almost.

I will pray for you, knowing how i was myself, no better then the rest. the right one for you will be a man who repent over his feelings and hates his sin of lust, don't worry tey still exist .
 
So true.. thank you. I truly appreciate it. May God bless ya.
 
Just out of curiosity, are you talking about on this website too? Because I've noticed that some men can get on the creepy side of things especially in the chatrooms through PMs. I don't mind joking but if it's like your first conversation - It's weird. That is the internet for you though. :/ We def need discernment.
 
All about sex? I thought it was all about that bass. No treble.

And of course I'll be praying for you, Prisca. :)
 
It's rare to me on here, but on another Christian site I go to yes. It doesn't happen on the first chat. It happens after we are comfortable with one another.. like the second or third time talking. It's very annoying... very annoying..
 
I've ran into the same trouble myself! You really just have to stay prayed up and watchful. At the first sight of mess, run and don't look back! Lbvs.
 
Here are a couple of things to think about:

1. You're beautiful and worthy of all that God has in store for you.
2. When you're born again and Christ lives in you, your natural beauty becomes all the more breathtaking. It's difficult for men to understand that the beauty is internally and externally and is to be treasured.

The call to purity is a forsaken call in the church. Therefore, flirting abounds. Sexual and inappropriate jokes and talk run rampant in mixed company. It's uncomfortable for anyone who is longing and reaching for holiness. Remain strong and when guys express interest in you, immediately let them know that you're not looking for that right now, that your focus is on Christ and holiness and friendships that are truly godly. If they want to be friends, great. If not, great. :)

We don't want to offend and so end up in situations that harm or offend us. Kindly speak the truth, firmly eliminate any attempts at flirting, and rest assured, the guys that still talk to you will be focused on Christ and, in His timing, you will meet who He has planned for you.
 
mystdancer50 said:
Here are a couple of things to think about:

1. You're beautiful and worthy of all that God has in store for you.
2. When you're born again and Christ lives in you, your natural beauty becomes all the more breathtaking. It's difficult for men to understand that the beauty is internally and externally and is to be treasured.

The call to purity is a forsaken call in the church. Therefore, flirting abounds. Sexual and inappropriate jokes and talk run rampant in mixed company. It's uncomfortable for anyone who is longing and reaching for holiness. Remain strong and when guys express interest in you, immediately let them know that you're not looking for that right now, that your focus is on Christ and holiness and friendships that are truly godly. If they want to be friends, great. If not, great. :)

We don't want to offend and so end up in situations that harm or offend us. Kindly speak the truth, firmly eliminate any attempts at flirting, and rest assured, the guys that still talk to you will be focused on Christ and, in His timing, you will meet who He has planned for you.
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All I must say is PREACH lol
But thank you though. It's so true.
Purity should be very important.
 
It happens to me all the time. I just wish the women would get a grip on their emotions. LOL
 
I just want to say that in my opinion it is mor hard to get a gf or a female friend as to get rid of people trying to be our friends. Because you know we have our holy tasks and rules and that seems to be strange to many people. But one thing I learned is that it's far easier to talk to someone else with god beside you. (I could need help at this)
 
I can completely understand where you're coming from here. It's important to develop a relationship and be married before sex actually happens, as the Bible teaches us. Although, I will say that it is definitely important to talk about sex before getting married (if that's what you and a dude are planning), just so you're clear about your thoughts on it. But that isn't the main issue here.

Something you said leads me to think that sex-talk and the subject of sex isn't your problem. You said in your post that you "just want a guy who will lead me to the Lord." The problem with that frame of thinking is that if you are a Christian, you are technically ALREADY in the Lord. No guy, no matter how awesome he is, will ever be able to lead you like Jesus. Instead of looking for a boyfriend to be your spiritual leader, look to Jesus. No matter how kind and pure and sweet a guy is, he will always fall short of the standard set by your True Prince. The same goes for women, too. You shouldn't be thinking about finding a guy who will "lead you to God." Just ask God and he will lead you closer to himself. As the Bible says in James 4:8, "Draw near to God and he will draw near to you."

Perhaps your feelings of depression and emptiness are partially because you are looking for fulfillment in the wrong area. While it is certainly an advantage for a woman to have a guy around who will provide spiritual headship, emotional support, and intimacy in marriage... this is no substitute for the fullness of God in his all healing, all completing power. Look to him instead. Then, when you've got your head on right and your priorities straight, go for dating. Be sure you have your heart in the right place...

"For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." ---Matthew 6:21

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." ---Matthew 6:33
 
Elijah19 said:
I can completely understand where you're coming from here. It's important to develop a relationship and be married before sex actually happens, as the Bible teaches us. Although, I will say that it is definitely important to talk about sex before getting married (if that's what you and a dude are planning), just so you're clear about your thoughts on it. But that isn't the main issue here.

Something you said leads me to think that sex-talk and the subject of sex isn't your problem. You said in your post that you "just want a guy who will lead me to the Lord." The problem with that frame of thinking is that if you are a Christian, you are technically ALREADY in the Lord. No guy, no matter how awesome he is, will ever be able to lead you like Jesus. Instead of looking for a boyfriend to be your spiritual leader, look to Jesus. No matter how kind and pure and sweet a guy is, he will always fall short of the standard set by your True Prince. The same goes for women, too. You shouldn't be thinking about finding a guy who will "lead you to God." Just ask God and he will lead you closer to himself. As the Bible says in James 4:8, "Draw near to God and he will draw near to you."

Perhaps your feelings of depression and emptiness are partially because you are looking for fulfillment in the wrong area. While it is certainly an advantage for a woman to have a guy around who will provide spiritual headship, emotional support, and intimacy in marriage... this is no substitute for the fullness of God in his all healing, all completing power. Look to him instead. Then, when you've got your head on right and your priorities straight, go for dating. Be sure you have your heart in the right place...

"For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." ---Matthew 6:21

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." ---Matthew 6:33
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I agree with everything you've said. Maybe I should have reworded "lead me to the Lord". What I mean is that I would like a guy to have edifying conversations. The guys I am referring about are people I just met. We don't get date or anything. We just get to know each other to become friends first. I feel like sexual topics should not be in our conversations at this early stage. But I just wish that we could do Bible studies together or recite scripture or something. Not for him to be my Jesus. I sure as ever do not need a man (not trying to sound prideful) to be happy. Jesus is my everything. He's my whole world. I would just like a guy who would step into the picture to go after Jesus along side with me and get to know me personally and spiritually without any sexual conversations or questions so early when I don't even know their favorite color yet ya know? Hopefully this will clear up any misunderstandings. But again, I agree with all you have said.
 
I may be missing the point of the thread here, and Im sorry if I am. But have you ever considered looking for men who are celibate? There are males who have chosen to avoid sex. If it is an issue with you, its totally possible to find men who feel the need to avoid it.

Also, there are people who stand under the name Christian, but are not really following Christ's word. I cant imagine anyone who calls themselves Christian but delights in lewd conversation are really following Christ. I would be weary of any guy who tries to get you to talk about anything like that.

Be careful of celibate websites, though. I tried one once, and there were people who were celibate, but also men and women who had pictures of themselves in provocative poses. It made me wonder if they knew what the word celibacy means :/

But yeah, I can definitely tell you there are males who are not looking for that :p
 
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