Does anyone believe in falling in love?

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A

Arigirl

Guest
#1
#1
Being at a young age, I understand little of life nor relationships. Though from what I have known, there is a huge consequence to some love and that is through heartbreaks. And even those who last and get married, many will become miserable years later. And people are so specific about being with another person. They put demands on another person. they make them into their hopes, dreams, and expectations, rather than that person just being them. They're not really in love just because they love someone. They're 'in love' just so they are not alone.

So, then, does anyone believe in falling in love? Is anyone satisfied to just fall in love?

Or are relationships all about filling an empty space in your heart? Do you want to get married so that your expectations will be filled?

I'd really love to hear your opinions on this. It's been bugging me for so long now.

God bless!
 
M

MollyConnor

Guest
#2
#2
Arigirl said:
Being at a young age, I understand little of life nor relationships. Though from what I have known, there is a huge consequence to some love and that is through heartbreaks. And even those who last and get married, many will become miserable years later. And people are so specific about being with another person. They put demands on another person. they make them into their hopes, dreams, and expectations, rather than that person just being them. They're not really in love just because they love someone. They're 'in love' just so they are not alone.

So, then, does anyone believe in falling in love? Is anyone satisfied to just fall in love?

Or are relationships all about filling an empty space in your heart? Do you want to get married so that your expectations will be filled?

I'd really love to hear your opinions on this. It's been bugging me for so long now.

God bless!
Click to expand...
I believe in love but I define love differently than the world does. I think love is about sacrifice. When you look up love in the dictionary, it should have a picture of Jesus on the cross for us because that is the ultimate picture of love.

We are all humans and sinful, we make mistakes and will never be able to love perfectly like Jesus does. That is why we need him even when we do marry. Why do you think there is so much divorce nowadays? It's because those people don't have Christ. My mom tells me that without Christ, you can't really be happy and when it comes down to it, she's right.

I used to think that way. I used to think about what a boyfriend or husband would be able to do for me. But now I think about how I would be able to serve him. If I do marry, how am I going to minister to this man? How will I be a good wife and mother to our children? I think those are the questions we should ask ourselves before we get married. We should get into the thinking of 'how am I going to serve' instead of 'how are they going to serve me?' And that goes for every relationship like friendships and family, not just a spouse.

So yeah...that's what I think. :D
 
R

RememberTheSabbathDay

Banned
#3
Nov 30, 2013
682
10
0
#3
Arigirl said:
Being at a young age, I understand little of life nor relationships. Though from what I have known, there is a huge consequence to some love and that is through heartbreaks. And even those who last and get married, many will become miserable years later. And people are so specific about being with another person. They put demands on another person. they make them into their hopes, dreams, and expectations, rather than that person just being them. They're not really in love just because they love someone. They're 'in love' just so they are not alone.

So, then, does anyone believe in falling in love? Is anyone satisfied to just fall in love?

Or are relationships all about filling an empty space in your heart? Do you want to get married so that your expectations will be filled?

I'd really love to hear your opinions on this. It's been bugging me for so long now.

God bless!
Click to expand...



Dear Arigirl,



The falling in love is really a myth because love relationships are of God seeing He is LOVE..(nothing of God falls anywhere) anything other than the love that God says a man should have for a woman is really lust...God says when lust is conceived it brings forth death...When a man or woman enters a relationship based on the outward appearances, bank account, material things....it will crumble from the inside out...God's Word holds true forever...Unless the Lord build the house, they labor in vain that build it, except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh in vain. Psalm 127:1. In other words, is the foundation of the relationship built on the ROCK of JESUS...or the Sands of SATAN. People who shack up are putting the cart before the horse...having sex, babies, buying houses together who are not married...This is not of God...this is the way of the world.

God says He will chose our spouses...but the majority of the world, do their own choosing which when ends, we blame the other person rather than blaming self for not waiting on the Lord to make the decision for us...plus...we must be spiritually equipped to receive the treasure that God wants to give us...so we must allow God to prepare our hearts..so when He brings people together, it will be a match made in heaven...because both people will have the mind of Christ...Everything we do is either for or against God. Look to the Word of God for answers to life. He will show you the way...because He says, I am the WAY, the TRUTH, and the LIFE. No man comes unto the FATHER but by HIM....this means God gives us the wisdom of the FATHER through the HOLY SPIRIT...

PS
Always remember little one that if a person who gives u advise does not direct u to the Bible, then their advice is in vain...God says, If they speak not according to His WORD...there is NO light in them. When we let Satan drive, he takes us further than we want to go and keeps us longer than we want to stay.

I pray this helps.
 
garet82

garet82

Senior Member
#4
Jan 20, 2011
679
85
28
#4
I believe in love
Since our christianity basic teaching is "love God with all your heart and all your mind, and love others like you love yourself" amen
But falling in love i think thats just for something you like at you first see n you want it.
Thats different with "love" in christianity that tend tobe "agaphe love" which be "unconditional love" thats what i believe about love but not falling in love :)
 
S

Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#5
#5
Love for others, by biblical standards, is outlined as the complete antithesis of selfishness, yet we tend to be selfish creatures. I believe "falling in love" is romanticized ad nauseum while "loving our neighbors as we love ourselves" isn't stressed enough.

What exactly do you mean by "do you believe in falling in love?"
 
cinder

cinder

Senior Member
#6
Mar 26, 2014
4,414
2,405
113
#6
Arigirl said:
Being at a young age, I understand little of life nor relationships. Though from what I have known, there is a huge consequence to some love and that is through heartbreaks. And even those who last and get married, many will become miserable years later. And people are so specific about being with another person. They put demands on another person. they make them into their hopes, dreams, and expectations, rather than that person just being them. They're not really in love just because they love someone. They're 'in love' just so they are not alone.

So, then, does anyone believe in falling in love? Is anyone satisfied to just fall in love?

Or are relationships all about filling an empty space in your heart? Do you want to get married so that your expectations will be filled?

I'd really love to hear your opinions on this. It's been bugging me for so long now.

God bless!
Click to expand...
Love isn't something you fall into that's wonderful and perfect and then everything is happily ever after and just works out. Love is something you pour yourself into and devote everything to finding a way to make it work out. And yeah, loving a person isn't going to make them everything you want them to be, in fact best advice might be not to get too serious with someone until you can identify at least a few of their weaknesses (that will be a good indicator that you are thinking rationally and not still on an infatuated high).

Of course all this advice is coming from someone who has involuntarily just about perfected the art of being always the friend and never the girlfriend so take it for what it's worth.
 
J

JeniBean

Guest
#7
#7
The question one should ask themselves is.....Am I in love or am I in love with the idea of being in love?

To love someone is to take them through the good and bad. To love some one you must be great friends, as sometimes life simply doesn't allow you the opportunity to have all the romance. And to truly love someone you must love yourself. At your age you will be in love many times and one day the person whom GOD intends for you will walk into your life and then you will know love, sacrifice, pain, happiness, unselfishness, friendship and commitment.

I know at your age you rarely see marriages last and see heart ache. You also have the media splashing divorce, uncoupling, separation, cheating, etc...more so then healthy couples and lasting relationships. I am fortunate enough to be sourounded by all long lasting married couples. And I will tell you the one thing I noticed. They all have GOD as the center of their life. That is where I failed...I married a man whom did not have God in his life. We all make mistakes and learn from them.

Right now date to have fun and see what its like if you want to. Dont date for long term commitment. You're to young for that.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#8
Aug 13, 2014
26,724
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#8
wot's love?
 
S

setapartgirl

Guest
#10
#10
Ive been hurt before, but i still believe in TRUE LOVE..If that relationship honors God then its true love...falling inlove is a great feeling, but at the same time be prepared about the consequences...
 
C

chenly

Guest
#11
#11
I believe in true love too. Although I've been hurt before, but I know everything has a reason and in God's perfect time. Im happy with God's unconditional love and I thank him for that.
 
Olerica

Olerica

Banned
#12
Apr 15, 2014
2,050
38
0
#12
I don't know if you can fall in love. I've been in love, but my experience is that it's admiration, infatuation, attraction, challenge, and comfort that grows together.

I think it actually takes years to fall in love truly. Not years to make the kind of commitment that leads to a happy marriage, but years IN that marriage to have the depth of love. So many of us, me included, think or have thought that infatuation and the FEELINGS of excitement and attraction were what love is, but the truth is that love is a choice and it's a daily choice of choosing that other person, and choosing to build the relationship, choosing to forgive the dumb little annoyances and slights, choosing to communicate when things aren't right, choosing to prefer that other person over any other person, choosing to walk together with God.

Yes, there is true love. But if it's a fall? It's like skydiving from the sun to the earth (not that it's possible to do that... but stick with the mental picture). It's a lot of commitment through some difficult times with hopefully a lot of pleasurable moments in between the tough stuff.
 
S

Stand_Strong

Guest
#13
#13
Olerica said:
I don't know if you can fall in love. I've been in love, but my experience is that it's admiration, infatuation, attraction, challenge, and comfort that grows together.

I think it actually takes years to fall in love truly. Not years to make the kind of commitment that leads to a happy marriage, but years IN that marriage to have the depth of love. So many of us, me included, think or have thought that infatuation and the FEELINGS of excitement and attraction were what love is, but the truth is that love is a choice and it's a daily choice of choosing that other person, and choosing to build the relationship, choosing to forgive the dumb little annoyances and slights, choosing to communicate when things aren't right, choosing to prefer that other person over any other person, choosing to walk together with God.

Yes, there is true love. But if it's a fall? It's like skydiving from the sun to the earth (not that it's possible to do that... but stick with the mental picture). It's a lot of commitment through some difficult times with hopefully a lot of pleasurable moments in between the tough stuff.
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I was going to weigh in but I can't top this...
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#14
Aug 13, 2014
26,724
8,959
113
#14
Olerica that reminds me of an old quote I saw somewhere. "In love? No, we're not in love. We are just very... deeply... In like. "
 
A

Arigirl

Guest
#15
#15
I see. But isn't falling in love allowed to be unconditional? What is love, when we love someone romantically, if we don't fall in love with who they are? Do we love them just because we love everyone else? If you could clear that up, I'd appreciate it! :)
 
A

Arigirl

Guest
#16
#16
I mean do you believe in just loving someone? Without constraints or the rules society puts on us. Without expectations. Just simply loving someone romantically because they are. Without overthinking it, though considering what the Bible says of course. (For example. Do not be unequally yolked.)
 
A

Arigirl

Guest
#17
#17
I understand what you are saying sister, but I must disagree with your last sentence. I've been in two relationships so far. I've learned a lot through little experience. And one thing I realize is that dating without commitment is not what I believe God intended. All through the Bible, our examples of couples who are moral have been two people, who practically from the get-go are committed to each other. When Adam first laid his eyes on Eve, he was committed. So if commitment is dead at my young age, then I best not date.

But I agree with what you said earlier. God centered relationships take an important value in a good marriage. It is of the utmost importance to have a God centered relationship, as a matter of fact.
 
maxwel

maxwel

Senior Member
#18
Apr 18, 2013
9,526
2,608
113
#18
Twu Wuv ... I beweeve.

[video=youtube;Sbqv3MwwVd8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sbqv3MwwVd8[/video]
 
Olerica

Olerica

Banned
#19
Apr 15, 2014
2,050
38
0
#19
Arigirl said:
I see. But isn't falling in love allowed to be unconditional? What is love, when we love someone romantically, if we don't fall in love with who they are? Do we love them just because we love everyone else? If you could clear that up, I'd appreciate it! :)
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I don't think humans are capable of truly unconditional love. Our love comes with conditions. We might love everyone because we are called to, but that isn't as deep as the affectionate love that we have for someone who has an appealing personality, which is less than that of a friend who has shown their worth, which is less than someone with whom we develop relationship with, which is less that that of a spouse.

IMHO, there is an aspect of a scale there, but each point on the scale has different depths and levels of complexity and commitment
 
Utah

Utah

Banned
#20
Dec 1, 2014
9,701
252
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#20
I fall in love every day. Ooh, look at that! Gotta go! :p
 
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