Why wait but why not wait???!

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setapartgirl

Guest
#1
#1
I attended a christian symposium in our church last night, the topic was all about WAITING.

I don't know if it depends in culture differences, but i know some christian people living in other country that having pre marital sex is okay with them, and living in together with out getting married first seems just fine to them, and i don't want to judge them, because here in our country its a taboo, those things, but people here are doing it anyways, i just want to know what other culture think of this, but ofcourse it's written in the bible, its all wrong. But i just want to get some point of views of the people here.

And as a christian woman, should you just wait for the man to make a move? And let them do the work or is it okay to do the first move first, like asking for their names and make friends with them?

Thank you for answering!! :)
 
BruceWayne

BruceWayne

Senior Member
#2
Aug 7, 2013
3,694
357
83
Gotham City
#2
Obviously it's against what the Bible says, but as far as culture, it's nothing unusual in the USA. And I can't speak as a christian woman lol, but just in my opinion, it's perfectly okay for either gender to make the first move or initiate conversation, as long as you're comfortable doing so. :)

As for waiting...

DeRCH82.jpg

Just kidding , of course :p
 
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setapartgirl

Guest
#3
#3
BruceWayne said:
Obviously it's against what the Bible says, but as far as culture, it's nothing unusual in the USA. And I can't speak as a christian woman lol, but just in my opinion, it's perfectly okay for either gender to make the first move or initiate conversation, as long as you're comfortable doing so. :)

As for waiting...

View attachment 136637

Just kidding , of course :p
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Ahahahaha you made me laugh out loud with that qoute man!it's perfect!!!hahaha the poor idiot may be stuck in a tree or something!!ahahaha can't stop laughing, yeah very well said, because here, mostly it should be the man who will do the first move and what about living in together? Without marrying each other first? Correct me if i am wrong but its so common in america too right?even Christian?
 
BruceWayne

BruceWayne

Senior Member
#4
Aug 7, 2013
3,694
357
83
Gotham City
#4
setapartgirl said:
Ahahahaha you made me laugh out loud with that qoute man!it's perfect!!!hahaha the poor idiot may be stuck in a tree or something!!ahahaha can't stop laughing, yeah very well said, because here, mostly it should be the man who will do the first move and what about living in together? Without marrying each other first? Correct me if i am wrong but its so common in america too right?even Christian?
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haha I thought that was funny too. But um, living together is common here. However, I personally don't know any christians that have done that(though, I'm sure they are out there). I certainly would not, nor would I advise anyone to ever do so, as even with the best intentions, I would think that might open the door for situations of temptation that we wouldn't want to put ourselves in. :)
 
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Caribbean_Beauty

Guest
#5
#5
Living together as a couple and you are not married is not a wise choice. If your intentions are to flee from fornication doing such is looking for trouble and wont make it easier to resist.
 
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Caribbean_Beauty

Guest
#6
#6
Living together as a couple and you are not married is not a wise choice. If your intentions are to flee from fornication doing such is looking for trouble and wont make it easier to resist. In terms of making the first move I think its ok to say hello or introduce yourself to a guy. However you have to consider the culture you are in at the time of such a meeting.
 
A

Abing

Guest
#7
#7
setapartgirl said:
I attended a christian symposium in our church last night, the topic was all about WAITING.

I don't know if it depends in culture differences, but i know some christian people living in other country that having pre marital sex is okay with them, and living in together with out getting married first seems just fine to them, and i don't want to judge them, because here in our country its a taboo, those things, but people here are doing it anyways, i just want to know what other culture think of this, but ofcourse it's written in the bible, its all wrong. But i just want to get some point of views of the people here.

And as a christian woman, should you just wait for the man to make a move? And let them do the work or is it okay to do the first move first, like asking for their names and make friends with them?

Thank you for answering!! :)
Click to expand...
As a christian woman, I don't really think it matters who makes the first move. Personally, though, (and this is just me) I'm content enough with being single (at least for now) that I wouldn't really make any move at all. However, if I meet someone and get really attracted to him, I would make a move toward God (that is, ask if it's His will, before anything else - because you and I know the pain of falling out of God's will). And when I'm really sure that it's His will, only then, will I make the move :)
 
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setapartgirl

Guest
#8
#8
BruceWayne said:
haha I thought that was funny too. But um, living together is common here. However, I personally don't know any christians that have done that(though, I'm sure they are out there). I certainly would not, nor would I advise anyone to ever do so, as even with the best intentions, I would think that might open the door for situations of temptation that we wouldn't want to put ourselves in. :)
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Yeah you should post some qoute like that here always, something to laugh about, hahaha, yeah, glad that's your point of view, Big respect to you brother.
 
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setapartgirl

Guest
#9
#9
Caribbean_Beauty said:
Living together as a couple and you are not married is not a wise choice. If your intentions are to flee from fornication doing such is looking for trouble and wont make it easier to resist. In terms of making the first move I think its ok to say hello or introduce yourself to a guy. However you have to consider the culture you are in at the time of such a meeting.
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Yeah fornication is a sin!!thank you for that wonderful point of view my dear!
 
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setapartgirl

Guest
#10
#10
Abing said:
As a christian woman, I don't really think it matters who makes the first move. Personally, though, (and this is just me) I'm content enough with being single (at least for now) that I wouldn't really make any move at all. However, if I meet someone and get really attracted to him, I would make a move toward God (that is, ask if it's His will, before anything else - because you and I know the pain of falling out of God's will). And when I'm really sure that it's His will, only then, will I make the move :)
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Perfectly said sis! Yeah we should make a first move to God first, not to the person! And yeah let's be contented for being single right now, let our heart heal first and focus to God first! ;)
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#11
#11
setapartgirl said:
I attended a christian symposium in our church last night, the topic was all about WAITING.

I don't know if it depends in culture differences, but i know some christian people living in other country that having pre marital sex is okay with them, and living in together with out getting married first seems just fine to them, and i don't want to judge them, because here in our country its a taboo, those things, but people here are doing it anyways, i just want to know what other culture think of this, but ofcourse it's written in the bible, its all wrong. But i just want to get some point of views of the people here.

And as a christian woman, should you just wait for the man to make a move? And let them do the work or is it okay to do the first move first, like asking for their names and make friends with them?

Thank you for answering!! :)
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Culture doesn't trump the bible. When it comes to what the bible says on a topic, that is the final word, not culture.

And if you mean in dating, it's a personal preference. Some people think it's the mans place, some think it doesn't matter. Some men won't like it, some won't have a problem with it. There isn't a single right or wrong answer.
There will be people who say that a man who isn't willing to speak up first can't be a leader in their home. That is not at all true.
 
resurrection33

resurrection33

Banned
#12
Dec 19, 2009
27,513
128
0
71
#12
setapartgirl said:
I attended a christian symposium in our church last night, the topic was all about WAITING.

I don't know if it depends in culture differences, but i know some christian people living in other country that having pre marital sex is okay with them, and living in together with out getting married first seems just fine to them, and i don't want to judge them, because here in our country its a taboo, those things, but people here are doing it anyways, i just want to know what other culture think of this, but ofcourse it's written in the bible, its all wrong. But i just want to get some point of views of the people here.

And as a christian woman, should you just wait for the man to make a move? And let them do the work or is it okay to do the first move first, like asking for their names and make friends with them?

Thank you for answering!! :)
Click to expand...
The Lord told us to wait, and he knows what is best for us. We bring trouble into our lives, sometimes really big trouble, when we ignore what he taught us.
 
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setapartgirl

Guest
#13
#13
resurrection33 said:
The Lord told us to wait, and he knows what is best for us. We bring trouble into our lives, sometimes really big trouble, when we ignore what he taught us.
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I could not agree with you more. :)
 
_nitro

_nitro

Member
#14
Feb 4, 2011
55
4
8
#14
setapartgirl said:
I attended a christian symposium in our church last night, the topic was all about WAITING.

I don't know if it depends in culture differences, but i know some christian people living in other country that having pre marital sex is okay with them, and living in together with out getting married first seems just fine to them, and i don't want to judge them, because here in our country its a taboo, those things, but people here are doing it anyways, i just want to know what other culture think of this, but ofcourse it's written in the bible, its all wrong. But i just want to get some point of views of the people here.

And as a christian woman, should you just wait for the man to make a move? And let them do the work or is it okay to do the first move first, like asking for their names and make friends with them?

Thank you for answering!! :)
Click to expand...
Well let me put in in a married person's perspective. I wish I would have waited. It is way more of a magical moment when sex actually means something, not just relieving each other's itch. My wife saved herself, but I did not. Like I just said, I wish I had done so.
 
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setapartgirl

Guest
#15
#15
_nitro said:
Well let me put in in a married person's perspective. I wish I would have waited. It is way more of a magical moment when sex actually means something, not just relieving each other's itch. My wife saved herself, but I did not. Like I just said, I wish I had done so.
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Its okay...there's what you called second virginity in holy spirit. You regret it, asked forgiveness to the Lord, and you are faithful to your wife, then that's it!!
 
M

MollyConnor

Guest
#16
#16
In the United States it is common for people, even Christians, to live together before they get married. It's very sad because a lot of them end up separated and marry someone else. I've seen several of my classmates from high school do this. I don't agree with it at all. I think part of the excitement of marriage is that you're going to live with love of your life for the first time! I also think that if two people love each other enough to live together, then they should make the commitment.

When people are having sex freely with every boyfriend/girlfriend they have, it ends up making things complicated. It's not right because when those people do get married, it's like what makes that relationship special compared to the rest?

Like Resurrection33 said, God told us to wait and he wants what is best for us. He loves us so much that he gives us all the advice we need in his word.

I know it's hard sometimes, but think of it this way. You know how children don't like shots and they cry when they get them? Kids also don't like baths and eating certain foods. Their parents force their children to get shots, they bathe them and they feed them healthy food to keep them growing strong. Even though the children don't like it, their parents know what is best for them. Waiting for sex is just like that. God knows what is best for us because we were created by him. He knows us better than we do ourselves.

Sex is a gift for those that are married. If you do that before marriage, it's a gift used in the wrong way and it won't reap the benefits.

I hope you understand and have the patience to wait. :) God bless you, sister!

Also, I don't know if a girl should make the first move or not. I'm still kinda iffy about that! haha. But I don't think there's anything wrong with her introducing herself to him or even talking to him. I just think the man should probably announce the feelings first, if there are any. :)
 
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Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#17
#17
Scripture says don't do it.

Shia LaBeouf says DO IT.

This is indeed a confusing world.
 
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setapartgirl

Guest
#18
#18
MollyConnor said:
In the United States it is common for people, even Christians, to live together before they get married. It's very sad because a lot of them end up separated and marry someone else. I've seen several of my classmates from high school do this. I don't agree with it at all. I think part of the excitement of marriage is that you're going to live with love of your life for the first time! I also think that if two people love each other enough to live together, then they should make the commitment.When people are having sex freely with every boyfriend/girlfriend they have, it ends up making things complicated. It's not right because when those people do get married, it's like what makes that relationship special compared to the rest?Like Resurrection33 said, God told us to wait and he wants what is best for us. He loves us so much that he gives us all the advice we need in his word. I know it's hard sometimes, but think of it this way. You know how children don't like shots and they cry when they get them? Kids also don't like baths and eating certain foods. Their parents force their children to get shots, they bathe them and they feed them healthy food to keep them growing strong. Even though the children don't like it, their parents know what is best for them. Waiting for sex is just like that. God knows what is best for us because we were created by him. He knows us better than we do ourselves. Sex is a gift for those that are married. If you do that before marriage, it's a gift used in the wrong way and it won't reap the benefits.I hope you understand and have the patience to wait. :) God bless you, sister!Also, I don't know if a girl should make the first move or not. I'm still kinda iffy about that! haha. But I don't think there's anything wrong with her introducing herself to him or even talking to him. I just think the man should probably announce the feelings first, if there are any. :)
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Thank you for that sister and yes i am against in pre marital sex too! I just want to hear or know the point of view of the others, and yeah in doing the first move you are also correct on that one! Thank you! I thought i am just too old fashioned! My friends used to tell me, have you ever asked a guy a date first?!and i said No, and they said why not?!?its the new trend now, the new world! And i replied well i don't want to follow the world!
 
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