6 Weeks before the wedding & now this...
- Thread starter soconfused2
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M
There isnt much point in posting further responses on this thread.
There is a saying that you can lead a horse to water but you can't
make it drink.
Unless the OP comes to her senses, nothing any of us can say will
make a difference. The worst thing about all of this is that an
innocent child could end up without a mother or in care, not to
mention the emotional damage.
I understand and I am listening. Part of me has considered reporting this...but like all abuse victims I feel a sense of blame or concern for him
The question I have is this...is there a difference between him grabbing my hand and intentionally breaking my hand...or grabbing my make up bag and refusing to let go and mangling my fingers, despite my screams that he was hurting me.
The question I have is this...is there a difference between him grabbing my hand and intentionally breaking my hand...or grabbing my make up bag and refusing to let go and mangling my fingers, despite my screams that he was hurting me.
He knew he had your hand/fingers, when you told him he was hurting you. Obviously he didn't care, or he would have let go. :/ He is an insane control freak, he likes inflicting pain, and you are very lucky he didn't stab or shoot you instead.. The blame for this incident lays entirely on HIM. Stop feeling sorry and concerned for this loser. What has he done for YOU lately, other than break and disfigure your hand? You are being played for a sucker, and he's doing a head trip on you.. YOU NEED TO REPORT THIS!! Stop flip-flopping and do it. He assaulted you, he deserves jail time. He'll get the help he needs in there, and you can get on with your life.. For the love of God, dump this loser!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
soconfused, please, please listen to us regarding this guy. He's dangerous, he's bad news, and you know this. Myself, AnneNoel and others have been through this before. WE KNOW what this guy is capable of. He has shown you what he's capable of, and still you refuse to listen, and see the truth. Take a good look at your mangled hand.. Like Sirk said, get your head out of the sand, get back to reality, and snap out this delusion you're in regarding this guy. If you go back to him, you better start shopping around for a casket..because he WILL put you in one. :/
There shouldn't be any questions asked at all. Hopefully, your ex is not second guessing this like you are and reported this himself for the sake of your kid. It's going to happen one way or another, sooner or later - just hoping for sooner. From the very second you walked in that door and that man angrily touched you - you should have walked away forever. Never, ever become dependent on someone's abuse. Never begin to enjoy that for one single moment. NOTHING about that defines love. I'm so sorry this has happened to you, but I know your not done with this man and that fact is quite frightening to me - moreso for your child.
You've been planning an exit for far too long and he knows it! He even reads here. Who cares about his career? His employer probably wouldn't be happy knowing they employ an abusive person! These are the type of people that end up doing something terrible in our world and people look back and say "oh, well I knew something was wrong but I was afraid to report it" .... His reaction is FEAR that he is going to be caught!
You have to report him. It's the only possible way the man is going to get help... he obviously needs some arm twisting here. Too, if you don't and he doesn't, the next poor woman coming down the road will be subjected to his abuse. So you're not just protecting yourself, you're protecting his next potential victim.
It's his own dang fault if he loses his job and career. Stop worrying about him!! He can take care of himself. YOU need to take care of yourself and your son. Break off all contact with this guy. Why won't you listen to us?!!! If he was this controlling and abusive to YOU, then he's DEFINITELY done this to other women before. Talk to some of his exes, ask if he abused them. I guarantee at least, one of them will say YES.. I think that on here at CC, you need to stop announcing that you plan to leave, just in case he IS reading this. Delete your account here, and make another with a new name, then pm some of us ladies so we know who you are.
You keep making excuses for him. Who's going to make excuses to your son, when and if this psycho hurts you again, or God forbid, kills you?? If you think that won't happen, you're fooling yourself. I watched a video on youtube today, and it was about a woman with an abusive boyfriend, she tried to leave him, he grabbed her, put his hand over her mouth and approximately 69 seconds later, he threw her off a high balcony to her death. I immediately thought of you, because like he did, this woman had a bag and he tried grabbing it. She ran for the door, and the surveillance camera in the hallway of the hotel shows him dragging her back in and clamping his hand over her mouth..
I don't know what more to say to convince you to be done with this guy. Either you enjoy the animosity, and enjoy being attacked and put in the hospital, or you just can't help yourself and are a glutton for punishment. :/ Take off your rose colored glasses and view this situation for what it is: an ugly, volatile reality..
Definition of insanity..."Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."
It is clearly a waste of time to try and help someone who doesn't want to help themselves. You have gotten to the point where this man has done you bodily harm and you are lying for him and trying to protect him. This is insanity.
I will pray for you and more so for your son who you are trying to place in this dysfunctional mess and that you insist on keeping yourself in....
As for me I am totally done posting here as it is clearly a waste of time. Enjoy your married life or grow a backbone and leave.
It is clearly a waste of time to try and help someone who doesn't want to help themselves. You have gotten to the point where this man has done you bodily harm and you are lying for him and trying to protect him. This is insanity.
I will pray for you and more so for your son who you are trying to place in this dysfunctional mess and that you insist on keeping yourself in....
As for me I am totally done posting here as it is clearly a waste of time. Enjoy your married life or grow a backbone and leave.
