[after hearing me with the sniffles]
boss: what's going on with your nose?
me: idk. i think it's a sign.
boss: a sign to not be at work?
me: yes. because 1) it's raining, 2) it's raining, 3) it's dark outside, and 4) there's a time change this weekend.
boss: man oh man. who can argue with that? you would make an excellent lawyer.
me: i know!!! but you never believe me!!!