A small point. When I was talking about points made to me in general, I have not pointed out individuals, just a general sense of issues that strike me as contradictatory. Now if the points are right in themselves, they are just an observation.
If you find yourself in this position, it is just stating what your problem is, it is not slandering you, which is why you react so strongly. I could also be wrong, but that is why depersonalising helps.
In reality the issues we are discussing are actually important. What colours them is our personality and way of handling life. I do not mean to upset, just state why I do not accept what is being said against me. It does not help to just make personal attacks and not address the issues, which are actually of interest.