is this bad?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
T

Tintin

Guest
#21
Yes, it's bad. You shouldn't be in a relationship with anyone if you are indeed a real person and aren't trolling. Go to a good Christian counsellor, eat well, exercise and get good sleep. Then when you've given yourself a long sabbatical from dating and you're healed up, then and only then will you be ready for another relationship. But you shouldn't go after older men.
 
Jan 24, 2009
1,601
31
48
#22
Is it wrong that I like a bit older than me men than guys my own age? I am not trolling or any of that I am really just curious.. Is it sinful or wrong in any way? .. I'm not saying I like 60 yr old men but I'd say guys who are 3 maybe to 7 yrs older than me lol...
Heck, I "like" folks of all ages. There are some interesting personalities out there! Men and women of all ages...can be insightful and inspiring!

You're talking, me thinks, about dating.

Dating...that's that activity where two people check to see if they are compatible and want to spend the rest of their lives together.

Dating involves emotions and feelings and, therefore, making oneself vulnerable to another.


Dating is also an activity that many people treat like a recreational activity. They aren't really serious about the possibility of getting married, they aren't at all ready to get married, and they don't know what they can/can't offer in marriage. They're in it simply to be popular, to look "cool", to fill in loneliness, or for sport/game.

Are you ready for this serious undertaking(green) or is there another reason(red) why you may have, perhaps completely unaware, decided to ask about age gaps?

:)
 
C

cmarieh

Guest
#23
All I can say is enjoy being a teenager as long as you possibly can. I didn't really have a choice, but I had to grow up extremely fast and some parts of me felt like I did miss out on hanging out with friends with no responsibilities. As far as guys go the guys your age always seem to be immature, but I can tell you one thing you have a lot of maturing to do yourself and in so many cases if you would go after one your age you would mature together.

As for my personal preference goes I like men older than myself, but I am also older and have experienced life whereas you are still a caterpillar in its cacoon and not yet a butterfly, but until then enjoy your life with people your own age
 
G

godsslife

Guest
#24
Not a problem, especially since most guys prefer a woman younger than themselves.
I'm content to ignore your "I'm not saying I like 60 yr old men" remark. :)
I didnt mean to offend anyone thats 60 ! I was just giving an example . forgive me ?
 
G

godsslife

Guest
#25
If you were my daughter or granddaughter, I would advise you NOT to ask the world wide web who you should date. In fact, I'd be extremely concerned for you because there's too much of a chance someone might take advantage of your youth. I suggest you ask your parents, grandparents, family guardians, pastor and/or counselor.
people like putting their nose where it doesn't belong hm...
 
G

godsslife

Guest
#26
Well, now I'm going to have to reiterate that you definitely need to talk to your parents or guardians as I just saw on another thread that you are in fact, 17 yrs old. Being underage makes it illegal for you to date older men, my dear.
im 18 in 5 or 4 months obviously I will date older guys when I'm legal.. logic is gone hmm
 
G

godsslife

Guest
#27
Just wondering... what happens if a 16 yr old girl has a bf who is 17? Do they have to break up for a year when he turns 18??? :confused:
No they just can't have a sexual relationship unless she turns 17
 
G

godsslife

Guest
#28
Why not find your life in CHRIST, allowing HIM and the Holy Spirit to abide within you...and you will not have to post these questions here at all......for who but your CREATOR cares more about you than anyone else? You do not have to turn to total strangers on the internet to seek your personal answers to your hangups and confusion. You have an awesome GOD in whom you can pray to, confide in...as a heavenly FATHER....who knows your heart and mind so much better. What are you waiting for? Your life will never ever be fully complete without JESUS involved. Just in case you want to continue to ask questions..now you have an answer......try JESUS...seek HIM..and HIS truths...PERIOD!!!!!!!!
i find this a bit ridiculous I was honestly asking something innocently .. not offending anyone just asking a question to see if its sinful.. i think you should give this advice to other threads i've seen that are really explicit
 
G

godsslife

Guest
#29
Well, If you are infact 17 and not 19.. You definitely need to take a step back and reconsider. Though you are a teen, you are still a child at 17. You should really put this out of your head until youre older. When you do in fact hit 19, or whatever, then you could consider it. But you should focus in school and getting ready for the real world.
i dont need to focus on ''school'' but thank you for that i guess.. everyone has their right to make their own choice specially when im almost 18 in 5 or 4 months .. I'm not gonna say I know it all i have much to learn but i think your advice is not original
 
G

godsslife

Guest
#31
All I can say is enjoy being a teenager as long as you possibly can. I didn't really have a choice, but I had to grow up extremely fast and some parts of me felt like I did miss out on hanging out with friends with no responsibilities. As far as guys go the guys your age always seem to be immature, but I can tell you one thing you have a lot of maturing to do yourself and in so many cases if you would go after one your age you would mature together.

As for my personal preference goes I like men older than myself, but I am also older and have experienced life whereas you are still a caterpillar in its cacoon and not yet a butterfly, but until then enjoy your life with people your own age
i appreciate the advice .. i really prefer not to deal with people my age because they will bring me back to my sinful ways .. ive tried it didnt work out.. and as for your story of growing up fast had the same thing going on for me .. just cause im a christian and on here and 17 doesn't mean i haven't had experiences in my life that have made me regret some choices i made in my past but i cannot stay thinking in the past or else i never been cleansed in my head !
 
C

cmarieh

Guest
#33
i appreciate the advice .. i really prefer not to deal with people my age because they will bring me back to my sinful ways .. ive tried it didnt work out.. and as for your story of growing up fast had the same thing going on for me .. just cause im a christian and on here and 17 doesn't mean i haven't had experiences in my life that have made me regret some choices i made in my past but i cannot stay thinking in the past or else i never been cleansed in my head !
You remind me so much of my sister. She had all the guys interested in her and wanted to date. All of her classmates were a negative influence and caused her to go down a very rough patch, one of those guys is sitting in jail. She graduated and we moved where she began working for a farmer and they later started dating, engaged and later married. Now they are expecting a baby due in May. She had dreams of being a police officer and got accepted to a school her senior year. Now, she regrets not going and getting married right away. Don't get me wrong she loves her husband, but not living her ultimate goal in life.

My suggestion is go to a Christian youth group and find people that would have a positive influence on you and your walk and enjoy being 17 because it only happens once. Btw, it's not healthy to assume all people your age are a negative influence and all I'm saying is give it a chance. Enjoy bon fires, sporting events, and dances like prom it's all part of growing up and I don't want you to have regrets. God bless
 
C

crosstweed

Guest
#34
people like putting their nose where it doesn't belong hm...
A protip for ya, m'dear: don't start a thread asking for advice and opinions and then get snarky when you get advice and opinions.

It makes the people with common sense not like you.

Just sayin'.
;)
 
C

coby

Guest
#35
A protip for ya, m'dear: don't start a thread asking for advice and opinions and then get snarky when you get advice and opinions.

It makes the people with common sense not like you.

Just sayin'.
;)
or it makes them think you're a troll, thus they go troll around too
 
G

godsslife

Guest
#36
A protip for ya, m'dear: don't start a thread asking for advice and opinions and then get snarky when you get advice and opinions.

It makes the people with common sense not like you.

Just sayin'.
;)
Should i worry non stop each day that people dont like me? Cause despite their comments that i dont agree with i still love them .. and supposedly theyre ''christians'' so... maybe im not the wrong one here.. this is why i dont like affiliating with so called christians and end up being faker than ever
 

Dan58

Senior Member
Nov 13, 2013
1,991
339
83
#37
But you shouldn't go after older men.
Don't be telling these young ladies crazy things like that :). That's a dream crusher :)

I didnt mean to offend anyone thats 60 ! I was just giving an example . forgive me ?
I know, I wasn't offended at all, just joking because I just turned 60. But seriously, your right, that big of an age spread is way too much.
 
C

crosstweed

Guest
#38
Should i worry non stop each day that people dont like me? Cause despite their comments that i dont agree with i still love them .. and supposedly theyre ''christians'' so... maybe im not the wrong one here.. this is why i dont like affiliating with so called christians and end up being faker than ever
Actually, if you're always polite and respectful even with people you don't agree with, you won't have to worry seriously about people not liking you. In most cases, it will happen automatically. (And they won't accuse you of being a troll!)

I have seen nothing that in AuntieAnt's post that warranted that kind of attitude from you. In fact, it was good, solid advice, whether or not you agree with or wish to follow it.

On that note, you say that you love them, but a lot of what I've seen you post have been rather rude responses, so you'll have to pardon me and everyone else if we've gotten the wrong idea about you.

Fun fact: You don't have to be fake to be polite and courteous. You can blatantly disagree with someone and still be civilized about it (don't tell anyone in the BDF that... they'll want to argue with me about it. Lol).

so... maybe im not the wrong one here..
I completely fail to see anything or relevance in my post that pointed to you being wrong about anything; only discourteous.

I understand you're a bit frustrated, but just lay off the condescension and work on the maturity and you'll be fine.

On a different note, I do notice that you have been decent enough to back up on several occasions when you were wrong and apologize. I commend you for that.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,254
9,305
113
#39
Fun fact: You don't have to be fake to be polite and courteous. You can blatantly disagree with someone and still be civilized about it (don't tell anyone in the BDF that... they'll want to argue with me about it. Lol).
I have to disagree with you on this crosstweed. In fact I know there is scripture that proves you are wrong about this, so terribly wrong, but I can't find it right now. But I swear it's there, and when I find it I will show you just how wrong you are. :p
 
T

Tintin

Guest
#40
Don't be telling these young ladies crazy things like that :). That's a dream crusher :)



I know, I wasn't offended at all, just joking because I just turned 60. But seriously, your right, that big of an age spread is way too much.
She's 17 years old. She shouldn't be dating older dudes at that age.