I do not want to come across as blunt, but if you were actually molested at age 10, and you had no concept of it for 50 years, would it be in the right to say the experience as it occurred was not as bad as the stigma you are feeling about it now, considering whatever twisted thing told you was molestation, you went 50 years believing wasn't molestation, and you did not feel molested then, or for 50 years after it?
Would this not mean the experience of being told what happened was molestation was worse than what you actually went through, and also suggest these people's ideas of what molestation is, perhaps might not be what molestation is in a sense you would have to feel defiled over it?
molestation is such a broad word for contact, if anybody put their hand on your shoulder to comfort you at a time in your life, some sick perverted person could walk up and technically claim they molested you, does this make this common form of helping somebody feel better a dispisicable act of defilement and sexual activity? of coarse not.
If you went 50 years after someone touching you, and never thought of it as molestation, what actually happened could not have been as bothersome as the perverted explanation somebody told you they thought it was after.
Why not let what wasn't an issue for 50 years and was no fault of your own hurt you now? how many other things from 50 years ago could somebody reword until it sounded like a problem could they convince you of which for 50 years never bothered you, if they can bring up something from the past you never viewed a certain way as being messed up, are you about to let everything resolved from your past become unresolved by the people telling you these things?
and before you say there is no basis for what im saying, this is my stance in my life on the same issue, if the experience itself didn't hurt me, I do not let thoughts afterward cause me pain, where would the end be drawn doing this?
friendinpeace
Would this not mean the experience of being told what happened was molestation was worse than what you actually went through, and also suggest these people's ideas of what molestation is, perhaps might not be what molestation is in a sense you would have to feel defiled over it?
molestation is such a broad word for contact, if anybody put their hand on your shoulder to comfort you at a time in your life, some sick perverted person could walk up and technically claim they molested you, does this make this common form of helping somebody feel better a dispisicable act of defilement and sexual activity? of coarse not.
If you went 50 years after someone touching you, and never thought of it as molestation, what actually happened could not have been as bothersome as the perverted explanation somebody told you they thought it was after.
Why not let what wasn't an issue for 50 years and was no fault of your own hurt you now? how many other things from 50 years ago could somebody reword until it sounded like a problem could they convince you of which for 50 years never bothered you, if they can bring up something from the past you never viewed a certain way as being messed up, are you about to let everything resolved from your past become unresolved by the people telling you these things?
and before you say there is no basis for what im saying, this is my stance in my life on the same issue, if the experience itself didn't hurt me, I do not let thoughts afterward cause me pain, where would the end be drawn doing this?
friendinpeace
What the heck is wrong with you?! You're basically downplaying the seriousness of what happened to KA as a child.. No wonder he feels worse after having read your response.. :/ SMH