a timing question

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RyzenGrace

Guest
#1
#1
After taking about three years staying very far away from boys while I straightened out my own life and priorities I have accepted the offer of a date.... le excited! Anyhow, I am now completely dedicated to only considering a Christian man for the romantic aspect of my personal life, but I spent about 6 years running away from God and made some very bad decisions during that time. I want to be honest about my past, and I believe that there is someone made especially for me (and I for them) by God, and that man will be able to get over my past, just as Jesus has made my salvation possible, but when does one bring up these sorts of things? I am very active in my church and because I come from a Christian family most people do not know anything about my past. I don't want to be all "here is a dirty laundry list from when I was dumb" on the first date, but I want to be honest and not lead anyone into thinking I am something that I am not. Help?
 
grace

grace

Senior Member
#2
Sep 8, 2006
1,064
11
0
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#2
Everyone has a past. Thank GOD that He sent His son to die on the cross to cover our sins. He KNEW we would fail. Not that we might fail, not that we could fail...but that we WILL.
I agree that handing out a laundry list on the first date is not exactly the best move...lol BUT, I think if you both feel that there is a chemistry that you want to build on and pursue then conversations will flow naturally about your pasts etc.
It sounds like you recognize the life you were living was not good...and that you are striving to live for Christ now. Keep growing in your church, and stay strong!
You should feel proud for how far you have come, and that you are forgiven through the wonderful grace and mercy of God. :)
 
Lighthearted

Lighthearted

Senior Member
#3
Oct 17, 2016
1,779
818
113
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#3
RyzenGrace said:
After taking about three years staying very far away from boys while I straightened out my own life and priorities I have accepted the offer of a date.... le excited! Anyhow, I am now completely dedicated to only considering a Christian man for the romantic aspect of my personal life, but I spent about 6 years running away from God and made some very bad decisions during that time. I want to be honest about my past, and I believe that there is someone made especially for me (and I for them) by God, and that man will be able to get over my past, just as Jesus has made my salvation possible, but when does one bring up these sorts of things? I am very active in my church and because I come from a Christian family most people do not know anything about my past. I don't want to be all "here is a dirty laundry list from when I was dumb" on the first date, but I want to be honest and not lead anyone into thinking I am something that I am not. Help?
Click to expand...
Your battles sound quite familiar...
Being able to be as open and honest about your past is healthy for you in the long run.
You know you've found a keeper when you can share who you were, verses who you are, with someone that expresses love instead of judgement and ridicule. (Someone that understands that we ALL fall short.) I don't think I would expect someone to 'get over' my past. After all, a man and woman in love would eventually become one. Questions from the potential suitor are better than silence, although sometimes it can be difficult and emotional...but necessary. You'll know by one's words and actions if they have good fruit and I believe we can be prompted by the Holy Spirit if someone seems like the wrong fit.
What you have is a testimony worth sharing. Just one more way God turns bad things to good. So many Christians who have backslid often feel too ashamed to repent and come back to the table...even though they feel God calling them.
I pray God's best for you as you move forward.🙂
 
Lanolin

Lanolin

Well-known member
#4
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#4
Maybe people dont really need to know what happened more than ten years ago when the OPs first post was written...?

Unless asked, I personally wouldnt tell my life story on a first date, not cos Im ashamed but it would take far too long. And going down memory lane isnt really that fun for the other person. I think the best thing a christian can do is write it down as a testimony for others perhaps in a memoir maybe.

I would just enjoy the present, for thats Gods gift for us to share today.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#5
Aug 13, 2014
27,379
9,384
113
#5
What's hilarious is that the title of this thread is "a timing question" and there is such bad timing... :LOL:
 
AndyMaleh

AndyMaleh

Well-known member
#6
Jun 26, 2020
863
532
93
44
Montreal, Quebec, Canada
#6
RyzenGrace said:
After taking about three years staying very far away from boys while I straightened out my own life and priorities I have accepted the offer of a date.... le excited! Anyhow, I am now completely dedicated to only considering a Christian man for the romantic aspect of my personal life, but I spent about 6 years running away from God and made some very bad decisions during that time. I want to be honest about my past, and I believe that there is someone made especially for me (and I for them) by God, and that man will be able to get over my past, just as Jesus has made my salvation possible, but when does one bring up these sorts of things? I am very active in my church and because I come from a Christian family most people do not know anything about my past. I don't want to be all "here is a dirty laundry list from when I was dumb" on the first date, but I want to be honest and not lead anyone into thinking I am something that I am not. Help?
Click to expand...
Just say whatever the Holy Spirit inspires you. Since you're on the right path now, and are doing your best for God, it will be good for everyone if your dating succeeds, so do not worry about how you come across. Just do your best and leave the rest to God.

Godspeed.
 
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