Honouring abusive parents

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Sirk

Sirk

Banned
#81
Mar 2, 2016
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#81
Depleted said:
So, you just don't have an answer and turn it around into an attack?

Pretty much why I worried about Natania believing your "lessons."

You have but one lesson to teach, CTB. (Cover your butt.) Boundaries is not a Christian lesson. It's modern pseudo-psychology. Trust God, not "boundaries."
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Whatever...you're stuck in old ignorant ways.
 
RickyZ

RickyZ

Senior Member
#82
Sep 20, 2012
9,635
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#82
Mooky said:
Hi all,
I am seeking advice on how to honour manipulative and controlling parents.My dad is an ex- alcoholic ...so he has some co dependant tendancies.He raises his voice when he doesnt get his way ....but he is now a christian.
He tends to forget that for about 32 years of my life he has made no positive contribution.I am his only child and my mum is deceased.
How to I go about setting boundaries with a spoilt, entitled man - child who feels the world owes him something?
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I know I'm late to this party, but the Biblical admonition to honor one's parent(s) is based upon them being honorable.

Others here have touched on what we are to do with errant believers (parents included). I would add this to that:

Collosians 3: 21Fathers,[SUP] [/SUP]do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.

Or in the KJV

21Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#83
#83
Sirk said:
Whatever...you're stuck in old ignorant ways.
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Good example. Your boundaries are all about protecting yourself. Other people have no boundaries, at least from you.

Natania, this is what I was worried about. Sirk teaches how to get his own way. An entirely different lesson than honoring anyone, but himself.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#84
#84
Good thing Mooky hasn't been back. Everyone seems content with "do good to me, and I'll do good to you."
 
Sirk

Sirk

Banned
#85
Mar 2, 2016
8,896
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#85
Depleted said:
Good example. Your boundaries are all about protecting yourself. Other people have no boundaries, at least from you.

Natania, this is what I was worried about. Sirk teaches how to get his own way. An entirely different lesson than honoring anyone, but himself.
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I'm sorry you have no concept of where you end and others begin. Such is the nature of people intent on getting their way with others.
 
T

TemporaryCircumstances

Guest
#86
#86
Guys :/ please stop
 
T

TemporaryCircumstances

Guest
#88
#88
It's not just you Sirk.

If someone has a problem it shouldn't start an argument.

I. Do. Not. Want. To. Start. An. Argument. Every. Time. I. Say. Something.

So just please.... stop.....
 
T

TemporaryCircumstances

Guest
#89
#89
I understand some people don't like some people and we all have different ways of thinking.
But how do you think that makes me feel? Or someone in my spot?

"Oh I posted this trying to get help, or ask a question and I caused all this fighting"

It's not necessary guys....
 
T

TemporaryCircumstances

Guest
#91
#91
Depleted said:
Listen to Sirk when he speaks from a biblical perspective. He used to. I hope he does again one day.
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Sigh.... okay Lynn...okay....
 
RickyZ

RickyZ

Senior Member
#94
Sep 20, 2012
9,635
787
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#94
TemporaryCircumstances said:
I understand some people don't like some people and we all have different ways of thinking.
But how do you think that makes me feel? Or someone in my spot?

"Oh I posted this trying to get help, or ask a question and I caused all this fighting"

It's not necessary guys....
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Who caused all this fighting..? It's funny that we will argue over speaking in tongues but we all agree on speaking in bicker.

Just who is speaking thru us when we are here?
 
B

bravethea

Guest
#95
#95
JESUS SET ME FREE AMEN
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#96
#96
How do you know if something is the truth? When the advice comes from the Word, not the world/pop psychology/popular opinion.

Lots an lots of things were said on this thread, most weren't from the Bible.
 
H

healingsoul

Guest
#97
#97
Emotional abuse is just a serious as any other kind of abuse. I am so sorry you have endured this but I am also happy that your father is making some positive decisions. It is understandable that you want a relationship because it is very natural for a child to desire the love from a parent. Realize that your can forgive a person but that is simply the first step. The person must take responsibility for their action, admit they have sinned and to repent (and with God’s grace to move continually toward sinning no more). Repent means the person will turn from the actions and behaviors they once did. Therefore be cautious in your relationship. Sometimes I find reading information helps. I found a good informative article that might help For adult children of alcoholics .
 
Sirk

Sirk

Banned
#98
Mar 2, 2016
8,896
113
0
#98
TemporaryCircumstances said:
It's not just you Sirk.

If someone has a problem it shouldn't start an argument.

I. Do. Not. Want. To. Start. An. Argument. Every. Time. I. Say. Something.

So just please.... stop.....
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I seriously didn't come here to argue. I was just giving my two cents like everyone else. This topic is very important to me and I have quite a bit of experience dealing with it.
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#99
Feb 21, 2014
70,951
9,701
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#99
Personally I don't believe that abusive parents deserve to be honored by their children. Or anyone else.. Anyhoo, to the OP, just try to accept that your parent is old, stubborn and will never change. YOU can't change them so don't even try.
 
T

TemporaryCircumstances

Guest
#100
#100
Sirk said:
I seriously didn't come here to argue. I was just giving my two cents like everyone else. This topic is very important to me and I have quite a bit of experience dealing with it.
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I believe you Sirk
 
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