J
So much I could say, but I'll try to keep it short. Wife and I almost divorced in spring of 2014. She wanted it and she called it off. We mended and went on "Weekend to Remember " and things were great for a few months. Then bumps started to come again. We argue like many couples. I'm the one to initiate the forgivenesses....always. I bust my butt at home to speak to her love language. I'm taken for granted and undervalued. We haven't slept in the same bed alone at home for almost 3 years because of our son. She takes the approach of silence is golden and doesn't want to stick out the a few sleepless nights to take back our bed as husband and wife. Her libido sucks, her willingness to listen to my concerns sucks. I go out of my way to make Valentine's Day, Birthdays and occasional outings well thought out, planned and fun for her/us. I give her space and do my own thing when I can. I come from a place of I expect the best of her because she's gonna get the best of me...while she says she expects nothing from me, but I think it's ultimately she doesn't want to be a hypocrite since she doesn't do much for the marriage. I'm at a total loss. I love her with all my heart. She's selfish. She's suggested in the past couples counseling, but when I say let's go, she makes excuses and backs out. I feel trapped since I don't believe in divorce. I can't talk to her about it anymore because it's like beating a dead horse and we get no where. She doesn't feel like my best friend anymore. While I know the struggles are hard being a single mom half the time since I'm gone at the fire station often...I expect her to try while I'm home and she doesn't. I'm not one to ask, "what do I do...but what do I do?" Please help!!!!!!!