Can you fully live your life in Christ without being part of a IRL fellowship?

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Often I think my tendency to be lonely is a result of not having found a good church and fellowship where I live. I have been without a good fellowship since I moved back to Norway in 2005! I have found a good church and the people there are amazing. But it is 2.5 hours drive from here and I can't go there as often as I would like.

I think that the greatest christian fellowship could be the family, but with a son that doesn't believe and has moved out and a spouse that has not yet turned up in my life, that is not even close to a fellowship.

So. I am missing something.... either friends closer to home to pray and worship with or a church that is true to the Word and is as warm, loving and Christ centered as the one that is those 2.5 hours away in my local environment.

I even went to the local, gay marriage supporting, Lutheran church to ask if they had some activities I could join, and the vicar said no. We only have something for families, elderly and kids. So instead she came to visit me. Nice enough. But a fellowship with me and the vicar once a year, doesn't really count, does it?

How do you solve it, you singletons?
 
I'm a socially awkward INTJ Aspie teenage girl whose only Christian fellowships come from my family (Specifically, my father), and this site...and I'm really happy about my life...so there ya go. Don't really need to do anything special. :/
 
I started attending a church regularly when I became a Christian (single back then), and continued attending regularly (a few different congregations) through my married years and when my ex left. Despite the fact that she rarely attended church, she wanted me to find a different one. I flatly refused, and am glad I did, as she left town a few months later. I'm still single four years later, and still attend the same church.

Although I chose to lean on the Lord when my marriage ended, rather than on the church, being around like-minded people was beneficial. My perspective is perhaps skewed, because I have always been able to find a suitable church (though I would not return to any church I've left). The church I presently attend is the healthiest I've ever seen, and it is far from perfect.

I can only suspect that my life would not be as rich or fulfilling if I were not part of a regular fellowship. I would probably hunt for something, or at least start a home group, if I could not find a healthy fellowship. I think I'd miss the fellowship and corporate worship the most. Online sources can supply most other "needs".
 
My church makes us join a community group. I also joined a bible study, and Sunday worship.

You are missing like half of the Christian walk if you try to make it alone! :)
 
If we say no, you can't fully live your life in Christ without an IRL church or fellowship; we discredit the Christian faith of some of our most courageous brothers and sisters who follow Christ alone under tremendous persecution and may risk their lives to do so.

If we say yes, then it's a short step from there to somehow defining the essentials of our life in Christ as completely separate from fellowship and how we treat fellow believers. And this whole lone wolf thing certainly shouldn't be held up as the godly ideal.

As I think about the question, I think that maybe we need a new way of asking questions as Christians. A question that asks is it possible either leaves us striving after an ideal or feeling that our circumstances disqualify us from what's good or best? Maybe instead we should start asking ourselves how we can live our Christian lives to the fullest in our current circumstances, whatever those may be. (not picking on you toinena or trying to shut you down, just questioning our questioning)
 
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That's one thing I like about you cinder. You're always surprising us with good answers that we haven't thought of yet. :cool: I've been puzzling for three days how to appropriately answer this.

The Bible does say to not forsake assembling, but the Bible never did say "you're not a Christian unless you have a church to attend." Yeah you are missing something without a good group of fellow Christians to gather with and encourage each other, and it sure is harder to be a lone Christian, but that doesn't mean you have to drive five hours one way to get to the nearest good church every time they have service.

Wherever you are, you can be a Christian. Just do what you would be doing if you had a church to attend. Pray, sing praises, witness to the lost, help those around you who need help.

But yeah, it sure is harder when you don't have a group of like-minded believers to have a good church service with.
 
I think it varies per person. As a former addict/alcoholic I find it very helpful to meet a few times a week at church and celebrate recovery. The more people I have that hold me accountable the better. I also find that I become bolder about sharing the Word with strangers the more I share among either group I am familiar with.

Perhaps the most incredible yet hard to fathom thing for me is....wait for it....I do not know everything! I love a good bible teaching and then discussion afterwards. As I continue in my walk it seems just when I think I have something figured out I am shown new insights, either alone while reading the Word or in church. I gladly spend a few hours a week for that. Lastly, I think it is very important to worship God in song with others.

Again, I am not saying these are "rules" and I know it isn't for everyone.
 
I feel confident in saying that I would progress spiritually if I were to regularly attend church of some sort. I've tried all the ones around my local area, and while there wasn't anything glaringly wrong with any of them, they did not feel like a good fit...kind of like an awkward date that you know just isn't going to pan out. That's bad enough, but to add to it, I do not get along with people in general and being around too many people for too long makes my skin crawl.

I crossed paths with some very nice folks in my church visits though, and I heard some very good presentations, but I haven't found anyplace yet that feels as though I belong, and to be completely honest, I gave up looking months ago.
 
cinder said:
If we say no, you can't fully live your life in Christ without an IRL church or fellowship; we discredit the Christian faith of some of our most courageous brothers and sisters who follow Christ alone under tremendous persecution and may risk their lives to do so.

If we say yes, then it's a short step from there to somehow defining the essentials of our life in Christ as completely separate from fellowship and how we treat fellow believers. And this whole lone wolf thing certainly shouldn't be held up as the godly ideal.

As I think about the question, I think that maybe we need a new way of asking questions as Christians. A question that asks is it possible either leaves us striving after an ideal or feeling that our circumstances disqualify us from what's good or best? Maybe instead we should start asking ourselves how we can live our Christian lives to the fullest in our current circumstances, whatever those may be. (not picking on you toinena or trying to shut you down, just questioning our questioning)
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Cinder,
I totally agree.
This is a very articulate, and very well conceived reply.

We often, unknowingly, create a false dilemma.
The solution starts with asking a better question.



Instead of creating an unconditional dilemma, we could just insert the proper conditionals and say, "What is the best, most bibilical thing I can do in my current circumstances".
This would be a much better question.

Since it's best to be in a community of believers IF POSSIBLE, and for most people it IS POSSIBLE, then for most people the question is answered, without unduly condemning those to which it simply cannot apply.
 
Honestly I believe I would probably benefit greatly if I could find a church where I wasn't just a number that took up a seat. Being a single of my age and well other stuff, it is very hard to find a place in churches. While I do go to a Sunday school class, service, and other activities as I am able to due to work...I rarely if ever see or hear from anyone there unless it is an accidental meeting. All that has been said so I can say this, my relationship with Jesus doesn't rely on having others around me or anything. I can study the word, listen to online messages, and sing along with "canned" music. If you have the option of fellowship with other believers, I say go for it...however if that isn't an option for whatever reason then Jesus is just as much there for you alone as if you were in a group.
 
Thank you all for great answers.

Perhaps it is all about seasons. And I am such a sheep, I easily am a good girl doing what authorities telling me, not seeking the truth in prayer and the Bible. Perhaps that has been my lesson. And it has been a matter of sorting out what should be the focus in the church I end up in. I am not that liberal that the Norwegian Lutheran church is. So i sought the Catholic church, because at least where clear in their view on e.g. abortion. But it soon became clear, luckily before the conversion that I can't take much of their teaching. And too charismatic "God is a vending-machine" churches were also totally wrong. So I have to find a church with sound preaching and a good, inclusive fellowship. As I said, I have found that, but it is too far away. I am thinking of asking them to help me starting a house church connected to them. But I can't do it alone. I am too busy with everything else at the moment. I keep my mind, eyes and ears open. Suddenly I might bump into someone sharing the same concerns.
 
Jonathan1977 said:
Honestly I believe I would probably benefit greatly if I could find a church where I wasn't just a number that took up a seat. Being a single of my age and well other stuff, it is very hard to find a place in churches. While I do go to a Sunday school class, service, and other activities as I am able to due to work...I rarely if ever see or hear from anyone there unless it is an accidental meeting. All that has been said so I can say this, my relationship with Jesus doesn't rely on having others around me or anything. I can study the word, listen to online messages, and sing along with "canned" music. If you have the option of fellowship with other believers, I say go for it...however if that isn't an option for whatever reason then Jesus is just as much there for you alone as if you were in a group.
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Long time no see. Good to have you back.
 
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