I will never be in a relationship and it makes me sad

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
Jun 13, 2017
136
2
0
#1
How do i deal with being alone my whole life? I would really like to meet a woman and get married one day but its impossible, it can not happen and that makes me sad.

I have too many flaws for a woman to like me. Its not possible to have a crush on me.

Some of my flaws:


bad posture (back and neck, born with it did not get it from too much sitting infront of computer etc)

extremely red lips (looks like lipstick)

little head.

big and deformed nose.

bushy eyebrows.

walking strange.

crooked foot.

ptosis/lazy eye.

my skin is terrible.

i have a weird way of looking with my eyes.

acne.

deformed fingers (they are crooked)

Both legs looks strange.

extremely skinny arms.

long forehead,

birthmarks in the face.

incredible bad at talking with people (i suspect that I have some kind of light damage to the brain)

weird voice.

hairy.

unibrow.

skin that protrudes at the nails.

Hiatus hernia.

strange / ugly hair.

big ears.

virgin and unkissed even though I'm so old.

Not had friends irl for 12 years. I do have 2 internet friends thought (2 guys who are like me)

Dyslexia.

stupid, low iq.

poor eyesight.

afraid of dogs and cats.

will never have a good job and never have a lot of money.

sometimes there are a lot of embarrassing random leak and saliva out of my mouth.

ugly looking teeth and they are yellow.

Sometimes I stammer.

blinks a lot with the eyes.

licking my lips alot.

extreme dandruff (no schampoo helps me)

sweats a lot and often, i use soap and rollon and try different versions .... but of course its not working.

Snores loud/weird according to my brothers. I sound like a car (?)

sleeping problems. Whick makes me look tired and sad.

no clothes suits me. I look ugly in everything.

long neck.


Etc. I can just keep going. I tried everything to fix my flaws but nothing is working. How i am supposed to live a normal life with all these flaws. I dont ever see myself getting friends and a wife. People are shallow. Why did god give me so many flaws and made people so shallow.
 

Lighthearted

Senior Member
Oct 17, 2016
1,779
818
113
54
#2
I agree with you because your whole attitude sucks.

Let's see if you can list 10 good qualities about yourself.
 
S

Sweetmorningdew78

Guest
#3
I don't know also the answer brother...I hope I can tell you something that will going to make you feel better... I can't find answer to your questions...


Society feeds us that you must be tall,skinny with shiny hair beautiful nose perfect teeth etc...if you are in a beautiful restaurant the waiters and waitresses will going to look at you from head to toe...they will look at you like wearing a beautiful dress means your pocket is bulky...I just watched a video on Facebook about a homeless man who was thrown outside the restaurant because he looks undesirable to their eyes even if someone paid his meal...sad you know...how callous are people these days...how some people are impressed by your looks and your pocket :(


As long as we are still in this unfair world we will going to meet those kind of people...this is the reality of living in this sinful world...most people put too much emphasis on the body and not enough on the inside...are you going to be one of those shallow people..? Or are you going to be one of those loving,kind and compassionate people who are not focused on physical beauty but are focused more on the inside...?



What if you are the opposite of the one you have mentioned....how are you going to see that person you just described? By his physical attractiveness or by his attractiveness inside?



One day the Lord Jesus will going to call us home...and all of those physical attractiveness won't matter none of those will matter...





I know it won't matter because God sees our hearts not how we look outside... :)




God bless you brother :) I will pray for you :) Remember you are special ❤
 
K

kaylagrl

Guest
#5
How do i deal with being alone my whole life? I would really like to meet a woman and get married one day but its impossible, it can not happen and that makes me sad.

I have too many flaws for a woman to like me. Its not possible to have a crush on me.

Some of my flaws:


bad posture (back and neck, born with it did not get it from too much sitting infront of computer etc)

extremely red lips (looks like lipstick)

little head.

big and deformed nose.

bushy eyebrows.

walking strange.

crooked foot.

ptosis/lazy eye.

my skin is terrible.

i have a weird way of looking with my eyes.

acne.

deformed fingers (they are crooked)

Both legs looks strange.

extremely skinny arms.

long forehead,

birthmarks in the face.

incredible bad at talking with people (i suspect that I have some kind of light damage to the brain)

weird voice.

hairy.

unibrow.

skin that protrudes at the nails.

Hiatus hernia.

strange / ugly hair.

big ears.

virgin and unkissed even though I'm so old.

Not had friends irl for 12 years. I do have 2 internet friends thought (2 guys who are like me)

Dyslexia.

stupid, low iq.

poor eyesight.

afraid of dogs and cats.

will never have a good job and never have a lot of money.

sometimes there are a lot of embarrassing random leak and saliva out of my mouth.

ugly looking teeth and they are yellow.

Sometimes I stammer.

blinks a lot with the eyes.

licking my lips alot.

extreme dandruff (no schampoo helps me)

sweats a lot and often, i use soap and rollon and try different versions .... but of course its not working.

Snores loud/weird according to my brothers. I sound like a car (?)

sleeping problems. Whick makes me look tired and sad.

no clothes suits me. I look ugly in everything.

long neck.


Etc. I can just keep going. I tried everything to fix my flaws but nothing is working. How i am supposed to live a normal life with all these flaws. I dont ever see myself getting friends and a wife. People are shallow. Why did god give me so many flaws and made people so shallow.

You are 26 yrs old. 26 years old!? Do you want to know how old I was when I had my first date? In my late 30s and my first kiss too. Want to know how old I was when I got married? My early 40s.No one,including me, thought I would ever get married. I was such a joke in my family that my BIL said if I wasn't kissed by my 40th birthday he'd do me the favor. That hurt. Along with the old maid jokes.

What I learned is that attitude is everything. There are people that are married in this world that have been horribly disfigured in accidents. There are people that are blind,paralyzed etc that are married. Do you have a good heart? Do you have a good character? One of the things my husband always says about me is that I'm the sweetest person he knows. I'm not,but he thinks so. He said it was one of the main things that attracted him about me,that I was a giving person. So I encourage you to be the very best you can be.Be yourself. Just because you are so hard on yourself doesn't mean everyone sees you in the light you see yourself in.
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#6
Lift heavy braugh. Makes a world of difference.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,354
9,368
113
#7
Tommy: Uh... yeah, lifting heavy would make a world of difference... with that hiatal hernia. :p


jovanovic: First, getting married is not the be-all and end-all of life. If you never get married, you still live your life. If you spend your whole life focusing on getting married and wind up never finding a wife, you are going to miss your whole life.

Second, if you do find a lady love you need to sell yourself a lot better than you are. Find some reasons you can give her to want you, instead of all the reasons you can think of for her to not want you. A salesman who actually wants to make a sale doesn't talk about all the downsides and defects in his product, he talks about all the good things he (or his company's sales department) can think about for his product.
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
#8
After saying all those negative things about yourself, try saying SO WHAT? It might give you confidence. Sometimes a little confidence is all you need.
 

Deade

Called of God
Dec 17, 2017
16,724
10,531
113
78
Vinita, Oklahoma, USA
yeshuaofisrael.org
#9
Well jovanovic, if you ask around you will probably find most people have an abased self image. Most people have issues with how they look. God gave me a modern proverb that goes like this: "The perception most have of their attractiveness is distorted; try to make yourself presentable then think no more about it.". Quit dwelling on you looks and build your character. That is what will draw someone to you, when God is ready. You are very young, and you have a lot of time. :cool:
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#10
Tommy: Uh... yeah, lifting heavy would make a world of difference... with that hiatal hernia. :p


jovanovic: First, getting married is not the be-all and end-all of life. If you never get married, you still live your life. If you spend your whole life focusing on getting married and wind up never finding a wife, you are going to miss your whole life.

Second, if you do find a lady love you need to sell yourself a lot better than you are. Find some reasons you can give her to want you, instead of all the reasons you can think of for her to not want you. A salesman who actually wants to make a sale doesn't talk about all the downsides and defects in his product, he talks about all the good things he (or his company's sales department) can think about for his product.
Does he want to be swole, or an old man?
 
Aug 2, 2009
24,646
4,305
113
#11
How do i deal with being alone my whole life? I would really like to meet a woman and get married one day but its impossible, it can not happen and that makes me sad.

I have too many flaws for a woman to like me. Its not possible to have a crush on me.

Some of my flaws:


bad posture (back and neck, born with it did not get it from too much sitting infront of computer etc)

extremely red lips (looks like lipstick)

little head.

big and deformed nose.

bushy eyebrows.

walking strange.

crooked foot.

ptosis/lazy eye.

my skin is terrible.

i have a weird way of looking with my eyes.

acne.

deformed fingers (they are crooked)

Both legs looks strange.

extremely skinny arms.

long forehead,

birthmarks in the face.

incredible bad at talking with people (i suspect that I have some kind of light damage to the brain)

weird voice.

hairy.

unibrow.

skin that protrudes at the nails.

Hiatus hernia.

strange / ugly hair.

big ears.

virgin and unkissed even though I'm so old.

Not had friends irl for 12 years. I do have 2 internet friends thought (2 guys who are like me)

Dyslexia.

stupid, low iq.

poor eyesight.

afraid of dogs and cats.

will never have a good job and never have a lot of money.

sometimes there are a lot of embarrassing random leak and saliva out of my mouth.

ugly looking teeth and they are yellow.

Sometimes I stammer.

blinks a lot with the eyes.

licking my lips alot.

extreme dandruff (no schampoo helps me)

sweats a lot and often, i use soap and rollon and try different versions .... but of course its not working.

Snores loud/weird according to my brothers. I sound like a car (?)

sleeping problems. Whick makes me look tired and sad.

no clothes suits me. I look ugly in everything.

long neck.


Etc. I can just keep going. I tried everything to fix my flaws but nothing is working. How i am supposed to live a normal life with all these flaws. I dont ever see myself getting friends and a wife. People are shallow. Why did god give me so many flaws and made people so shallow.
Let me tell you a little secret....

It doesn't matter what you look like...

All you need is CONFIDENCE..


If you simply make yourself appear confident (even if you don't really feel it), women will find you attractive no matter who you are or what you look like.

What's the secret to looking confident??

SMILE! :D


 

mar09

Senior Member
Sep 17, 2014
4,927
1,259
113
#12
Hi jovanovic,

Welcome, and i know u can have friends here if u be one too! Many come looking for friendship, and do find when they ask, seek, and knock. See, the others here have been very encouraging, and it is not our physical appearance that really matters to the Lord, but our hearts. In ur list, may i just say some things we have no control of and cannot change, but others are affected by our lifestyles, diets, our faith! Acne and dandruff, for example, are worsened by lack of sleep, anxiety, and the foods you consume, even water consumption. I dont know what u have there, but once a doctor said tar shampoo should be good for dandruff, and these are not very hard to find? I sure hope u find time to come back, and find ur friends waiting here. Do not dwell on the 'negatives' u see in urself. We here do not see u as u see urself, if u havent told us those. We all came at some time in our life... whether to give or take some, to share what God has blessed us with, to ask questions or for help when we needed some, to pray, or to encourage or help others when we are able... Many people said Hans Christian Andersen was ugly, but he did make many others, and children too-- happy.

I really hope u come back to share life, and what God has done for u. Surely u can find things the Lord has let u experience, to taste and see that He Is Truly Good!
 
Jun 13, 2017
136
2
0
#15
You are 26 yrs old. 26 years old!? Do you want to know how old I was when I had my first date? In my late 30s and my first kiss too. Want to know how old I was when I got married? My early 40s.No one,including me, thought I would ever get married. I was such a joke in my family that my BIL said if I wasn't kissed by my 40th birthday he'd do me the favor. That hurt. Along with the old maid jokes.

What I learned is that attitude is everything. There are people that are married in this world that have been horribly disfigured in accidents. There are people that are blind,paralyzed etc that are married. Do you have a good heart? Do you have a good character? One of the things my husband always says about me is that I'm the sweetest person he knows. I'm not,but he thinks so. He said it was one of the main things that attracted him about me,that I was a giving person. So I encourage you to be the very best you can be.Be yourself. Just because you are so hard on yourself doesn't mean everyone sees you in the light you see yourself in.
a great attitude will not delete/hide my flaws and will make people less shallow. nobody wants to be with a guy who has huge amount of flaws. there is a line for how many flaws a person can have, i can mention 100 flaws with me and that is way too much.

i am aware that people who have problems are in relationships but that is like 1 in thousand chance.....i am worse than these people, they are either better looking than me or they are better at talking. i dont have anything to offer.

yes i have a good heart and good charactar but it is not enough in todays world, maybe if i lived in middle ages it would ,seems like the society today is very strange and full of wickedness, i do not fit in and never will.

not everyone see me this way? then why have i been ignored and mocked my whole life?
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,889
1,958
113
Germany
#16
Hey if my brother has a girlfriend over 8 years, u can get one too. True love makes blind. Ur safe. You are young dont worry
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,354
9,368
113
#17
jovanovic you can't build anything until you stop tearing stuff down. God gave you a body and a mind. If you think this and that are wrong, you are the created, disapproving of what the Creator made. You are tearing down the temple God gave you.

First, stop looking for faults. If there is something you can change, like your job or your teeth, get it changed if it means that much to you. If there is something you can't change, ignore it.

You can build your own heaven or your own hell here on earth. Your hell won't be nearly as bad as the real hell, nor will your heaven be as good as the real heaven, but your life can be great or terrible depending on what you build. But you can't start building anything until you stop tearing God's work down.

Or... you could just keep having a pity party and let your whole life slide right by. It's up to you.
 
Jun 13, 2017
136
2
0
#18
Tommy: Uh... yeah, lifting heavy would make a world of difference... with that hiatal hernia. :p


jovanovic: First, getting married is not the be-all and end-all of life. If you never get married, you still live your life. If you spend your whole life focusing on getting married and wind up never finding a wife, you are going to miss your whole life.

Second, if you do find a lady love you need to sell yourself a lot better than you are. Find some reasons you can give her to want you, instead of all the reasons you can think of for her to not want you. A salesman who actually wants to make a sale doesn't talk about all the downsides and defects in his product, he talks about all the good things he (or his company's sales department) can think about for his product.
i would love to work out but its hard for me with the physical pain it gives me because of my hietus hernia. but i do take long walks everyday and eat healthy food.

it sure is not the end of the world to be single your whole life....but its something i dont want,,sometimes i feel very sad about thinking about my lonely life, i dont know how to make that sad feeling go away. i wished i could be happy with my fate.

i dont talk about my downsides and flaws with people, this is like the first time and its on a forum where nobody knows who i am. people judge me just by looking at me, they know that i have nothing to offer. and its get worse if they talk to me, then they for sure knows what a loser i am.
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#19
An old church lady once told me, "you have the power of life and death in your words."

Which one you choose.
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,153
113
#20
i would love to work out but its hard for me with the physical pain it gives me because of my hietus hernia. but i do take long walks everyday and eat healthy food.

it sure is not the end of the world to be single your whole life....but its something i dont want,,sometimes i feel very sad about thinking about my lonely life, i dont know how to make that sad feeling go away. i wished i could be happy with my fate.

i dont talk about my downsides and flaws with people, this is like the first time and its on a forum where nobody knows who i am. people judge me just by looking at me, they know that i have nothing to offer. and its get worse if they talk to me, then they for sure knows what a loser i am.
No pain, no gain.