A Question for the Men

[miknik5]

And please forgive me for the protective “mommy” in me

 

[becc]

I was 14 when I was molested so please be very very very very careful. Men who are older who are looking to talk to young teens have NO really good motives


do not do it and do not give your private information to ANYONE (male or female) on an internet

Thanks for you care and concern but i'm not doing that, i was just making a point and even if i wanted to do it... i don't think an "older" "man" would be what catches my eye.

 

[tourist]

I was going to make a joke about wanting you to stop sending me pics, but I'm sure somebody would take it seriously, and that would not be a good thing....

So, just pretend that I made that joke, and let's move on....

Sometimes people don't "get" my humor. My wife tells me I'm not nearly as funny as I think I am....

It would've been amusing though.

 

[miknik5]

Thanks for you care and concern but i'm not doing that, i was just making a point and even if i wanted to do it... i don't think an "older" "man" would be what catches my eye.

But

you're 14

I have a 14 year old daughter and I don’t think that she should be meeting boys on the internet

In fact I’m convinced that she shouldn’t meet any boys especially on the internet

 

[miknik5]

If you don’t mind my continuing this “becc” but I’m also convinced that your generation has become detached and has lost sight of the dangers involved in social media and chat sights

it is not the major tool (and shouldn’t be the major tool) to healthy relationships when you are old enough to begin one

which shouldn’t be at 14 years of age

 

[miknik5]

Okay. Sorry
I’ve had my (passionate) say in this
and if you want to know. I don’t even know how I got into this thread to begin with. It isn’t even one of the regular sub forums I visit

 

[AuntieAnt]

LOL! That’s the “welcoming crew”

i used to to get the same messages

I reported them but I also went into my private settings and stopped messages from anyone who was not a “friend”

I used the private settings, too. Nobody can email me unless they're on my friend list (except for admins).

It would depend on how well I knew this woman. I would not send my email address to a complete stranger that's for sure. Now if a woman that I knew a little bit, showed an interest in me and sent me a picture of herself so I could see what she looked like, then yes, I would give her me email address and would probably give her my street address and phone number too. This question is not hypothetical for me as I met my wife on this site shortly after I joined. There are those that say that this is not a dating site but yet we are happily married and will be celebrating our 4th wedding anniversary on Nov 27. The answer to your question is YES.

Awwww, what a beautiful love story you & JesusLives have, Tourist! ❤

I'm sure those who know her will agree that Melita shines like a diamond on this site. The spirit of God in her is so evident, she & I became friends pretty easily. And she is the same awesome woman in person as she is on this site ~ just beautiful! (And funny, too!!) After joking with her about my single son, they eventually began communicating as friends. And now, my son & Melita's first wedding anniversary is coming up in a few weeks! And I have the most wonderful daughter-in-law anyone could ever hope for. And her amazing parents and family are an additonal beautiful blessing in my life! ❤

The moral of my story: I thank God I joined CC and exchanged emails with Melita. \/

 

[tourist]

I used the private settings, too. Nobody can email me unless they're on my friend list (except for admins).



Awwww, what a beautiful love story you & JesusLives have, Tourist! ❤

I'm sure those who know her will agree that Melita shines like a diamond on this site. The spirit of God in her is so evident, she & I became friends pretty easily. And she is the same awesome woman in person as she is on this site ~ just beautiful! (And funny, too!!) After joking with her about my single son, they eventually began communicating as friends. And now, my son & Melita's first wedding anniversary is coming up in a few weeks! And I have the most wonderful daughter-in-law anyone could ever hope for. And her amazing parents and family are an additonal beautiful blessing in my life! ❤

The moral of my story: I thank God I joined CC and exchanged emails with Melita. \/

I thank God that I joined CC too. You have shared a wonderful CC love story as well. Maybe there will be other CC love stories from other members in the days to come.

 

[seed_time_harvest]

Gentlemen, if a "woman" contacted you via private message, saying she needed your help, but wanted your email so she could send you a picture-what would you think was really going on? Hint-rhymes with hammer.

Looking at the cup half full my ego might would say she wants to be romantic but If I were looking at the situation as In the cup Is HALF empty,I would be leery/suspicious that she might be trying to play me.
So then,Err with caution.

 

[seed_time_harvest]

I was going to make a joke about wanting you to stop sending me pics, but I'm sure somebody would take it seriously, and that would not be a good thing....

So, just pretend that I made that joke, and let's move on....

Sometimes people don't "get" my humor. My wife tells me I'm not nearly as funny as I think I am....

Your wife told you that?She knows you better than we do.

 

[seed_time_harvest]

Okay. Sorry
I’ve had my (passionate) say in this
and if you want to know. I don’t even know how I got into this thread to begin with. It isn’t even one of the regular sub forums I visit

The miscellaneous section can be an attractive area to be after a way too serious discussion In the bible study forum.

 

[Desdichado]

Its sad people are lonely enough to make such scams viable.

 

[renewed_hope]

I was going to make a joke about wanting you to stop sending me pics, but I'm sure somebody would take it seriously, and that would not be a good thing....

So, just pretend that I made that joke, and let's move on....

Sometimes people don't "get" my humor. My wife tells me I'm not nearly as funny as I think I am....

Haha...I tell my bf he is just full of it sometimes when he starts acting goofy

 

[Depleted]

I don't really care if anyone answers, so was just wondering if anyone else has had any questionable private messages, requesting emails so a picture can be sent.

Common on this site. I bet it was even from someone who just joined that day too. We usually just report them. (Been a while since I reported one, but I think there is a report button on the bottom of PMs too.)

And, rhymes with hammer?

Jammer?

(BTW, nothing gets me on a thread quicker than "A Question for Men." I am so totally nosy. lol)

 

[Depleted]

I was going to make a joke about wanting you to stop sending me pics, but I'm sure somebody would take it seriously, and that would not be a good thing....

So, just pretend that I made that joke, and let's move on....

Sometimes people don't "get" my humor. My wife tells me I'm not nearly as funny as I think I am....

So you think you're

but you're really

?

 

[Depleted]

Naively optimistic. 99% of the time a person you don't know online wants to exchange personal information and communicate off site is for questionable reasons.

Aren't all reasons questionable, even if they're good reasons? And isn't that the reason we question in the first place, to find out if the reason is good or bad?

Back when I was single, I liked to dance. (Disco.) But, it wasn't cool to dance by yourself, so I kept hoping guys would ask me to dance. For me, it was all about the dancing. The majority of guys who asked me to dance were shocked because they got a Yes. They had spent most of the night getting Nos.

I used to be a telemarketer too. And, I was good. For every 200 phone calls I made, I got 2-8 Yeses. That was double bonus numbers for what I was selling. (IT journals and manuals.)

If you don't ask, you never get a Yes. And, if you get a No, keep asking until you get a Yes.

I have never understood why people won't talk to new people to see if there is a connection, just because there wasn't one for the last 96 people you talked to. It's a guaranteed No, if you don't ask. And, eventually keep asking, and you will find someone willing to reach out for a connection. Who knows? Might go on from there like it did for Tourist. Might be another dead end, even if the connection is made. Or, big deal. You run into yet one more person who says No.

Very pessimistic to assume 100% No rate.

 

[Didymous]

Thank you everyone for your input. I didn't give my email, so I didnt get to see the picture. I pm'd the main guy, and he dealt with it, apparently, because the message is now gone.

 

[Depleted]

The only reason why i would do that is probably i see someone that interests me and i would like to have discussions with him but won't it to be a public thing.... I don't think everyone that tries to chat with you privately has a questionable motive..... And it also depends on the type of site it is... the site we are talking bout is cc so yea, i could do that on cc cuz you never can tell what would come out from a "questionable" attempt. We don't know what is in the heart of people, some might mean no harm and some would..... i don't think we should base our answer on pure logic or recent happenings..... if you are married (which i think you are) then u should let you wife know about this. I really can't type anymore... my brain is taking a nap

Well, CC has plenty of trolls, so don't think Christian site means safe site. And, the same guidelines should be used on here as are used IRL. Don't take candy from strangers, and don't hop in a car with a stranger. Use your instincts. If it feels creepy, stop. And if someone wants to show you her (or his) picture through your email address as an introduction that's as creepy as it gets. What kind of relationship starts like this? "Ooo, I'm hot so like me?" Not even.

Other creepy some of us get in PM's. "Hi, Sister. I run an orphanage in Africa, and would like you to...." (Usually prayers the first time, but there is an underlining tinge of "and send me money.")

My thinking on this one. Africa? Big continent. Something like saying "Europe." Lots of countries in that continent, so why won't you tell me the name of your country, instead of the name of your continent? But mostly, why are you contacting me by PM when I don't know you, you've never posted a thing on CC, and you haven't commented on a thing? First out -- chain mail a bunch of CC users? Creepy!

So, yeah, don't think CC means "safe place." There are no safe places anymore. The last safe place on earth was guarded by an angel after Man was kicked out of it... and, sure enough, kicked out after proving they were the ones who weren't safe to have there.

I don't close my PMs to anyone but the ones on my ignore list. (At least, I think that stops them from PMing me too. If it doesn't? Well, they want to talk to me, as much as I want to talk to them, so never got a PM from any. lol) BUT, if I don't know you at all, before you PM me, my guard is up immediately.

Just like friendships are started with talking first, PMs should be after first talking to someone. PMs are our car. We're picky on who we let in our car too. (Oh, come on. Like you don't already have plans for your first car? lol)

Sorry to go all Mom on you, but it's the Mom gene in everyone. It kind of happens.

 

[Depleted]

I was 14 when I was molested so please be very very very very careful. Men who are older who are looking to talk to young teens have NO really good motives


do not do it and do not give your private information to ANYONE (male or female) on an internet

You might want to think over what you just said there. Aren't pastors "older men?" Should they not talk to teens? Think of the men you know on this site. About half are fine talking to teens, right? And they would have good motives, right? I honestly get being careful, because it's so easy to assume Christian male = good man, when we both know where that goes wrong. But isn't it just as wrong to counsel to stay away from older men, just because some are creeps?

And then I haven't even hit on the concept that women can be creeps, or even teenagers can be creeps.

I do believe in keeping our guards up, but not into making a barbed-wire fence around us to save us from all others. That tends to get very lonely for no reason.

 

[Didymous]

I was going to make a joke about wanting you to stop sending me pics, but I'm sure somebody would take it seriously, and that would not be a good thing....

So, just pretend that I made that joke, and let's move on....

Sometimes people don't "get" my humor. My wife tells me I'm not nearly as funny as I think I am....

Yes, I've had some tell me I had a wonderful sense of humor-they just wished I were funnier