My husband and I have pretty traditional ”roles.” Of course, he took shop in school and I took home Ec. I never learned to tinker, but then, neither did my father, who I take after. When my maternal grandfather, (a big vet who liked to tinker!) died, my mom took over tinkering some things. Mechanics and repairmen got the rest.
My husband never learned to cook or sew. I guess I took after my mom that way. When I am too sick to cook, he gets take out, or something frozen. No wonder I cook if at all possible.
I take care of all our joint money, just like my mom did. My husband could do it, but he’s busy changing the oil in the 2 cars! Yes, it took me 25 years before I asked him how often he did it and how long it took, and realized I had been had!
He cleans house better than me, but won’t! So I got housekeepers because I can’t! Oh yes, we both worked always, except a couple of years after he got transfered to a new city, and it was a recession and I couldn’t get on teaching. I had 2 preschoolers, it was a great time to be off working. And the last 17 years of my work was disability. But, it was still income, just not as much!
Now are kids all took shop and home Ec, and they all cook and clean. Two sons and one daughter tinker. My daughter is probably my best at it. She had an old Nissan that was constantly breaking down. She helped with everything. There was a fuse that kept blowing, which my electronic tech husband couldn’t fix. So she bought fuses herself and replaced them, at 16. When her car was hit by a deer, she learned body work in a car that should have been written off.
The one son is clueless about fixing. His wife does it, or he takes it to a mechanic or in the case of appliances, throws it out and buys a new one. Lucky they make so much money. But his 4 year old son loves working on cars, yard work, or anything Grandpa is up to. I guess fixing skipped a generation!
Which is to say, we should go with what we are good at, share, compromise and always help our spouses. My family is diverse. We are all unique individuals God created and gave certain natural gifts. If a woman’s roles are cooking and cleaning, I was good! Yet, most woman don’t pursue advanced theological training, yet, that is what God has called me to do. On the other had, my husband is a natural theologian! He doesn’t confuse things, sticks with the Bible.
So my vote is we use the gifts, callings, training and experience God gave us, both inside and outside our marriages. No reason a man can’t be a chef, have the gift of hospitality and entertain!
And if we are just talking who is in charge, that honour goes to the husband, although, if the wife is better trained or more experienced in an area, probably best to trust her. One DIL is a doctor. No way that son is going to tread on the best way to help a child who is hurt or sick!