Do ‘looks’ matter to YOU?

[Ugly]

What is a “physically attracted person” though? How society views them or how a individual who doesn’t follow society view them? I go with the second. I refuse to follow the ways of how society runs.

That’s hard to pinpoint because we all have different ways of viewing what attracts us in the first place. Attraction in the eye is easy to do (and for some can become lust instead of love) but attraction in the heart of a person is more complex unless you get to know that person on a more deeper level which decides for you whether they’re the type of person you want to be with. That’s where I’m coming from, but I don’t expect people to understand that unless you walk in my shoes.

And that’s probably why I’m single lol.

I have no problem with people agreeing that looks matter, and in some ways I agree (like with your first post) but I wouldn’t base the whole “looks” thing to find me a partner.

At the beginning of this thread i stated that attraction is subjective and does not mean 'commercially hot' by default. Just in different words haha. I would suspect that the more focused one is on 'commercially attractive' people the less depth there is.

My point was that often times people who say looks don't matter tend to automatically assume it's a shallow mindset. Obviously we all have some differences in what we're looking for, but the general notion of having something beyond appearance and with a strong emotional connection can be just as important for someone that's interested in someone that also wants what they deem attractive. The two are not mutually exclusive. That was my point. You took a broad concept and turned it into a specific one, hence the misunderstanding.
Most people have been, or are, in those shoes. Anyone looking for an in depth, close, personal, sincere relationship feels exactly that way. They did long before you and will continue to long after.

So clearly that's not your reason for being single. But we both knew that already =P

 

[BruceWayne]

Do looks matter when pursuing or getting to know someone on a deeper romantic level - whether it’s online, in real life, on text, phone etc.

As a whole, male or female, do you think attraction in the opposite sex should matter?

Yes. I won't pretend they don't matter in the slightest when it comes to romantic relationships. It's reasonable and human. The first thing I notice about anyone is their appearance. It's not the only thing that matters, but it catches attention and opens the door. I would certainly hope that I'm physically attracted to my girlfriend/wife, etc. I would not be interested in them if I wasn't.

 

[tourist]

Lol..i think if everyone is HONEST they would ALL say that looks matter to SOME extent..its just the "extent" that it is...i think for men..it seem that looks ARE more important than with a woman..differences between the sexes? Maybe..but if we are to be "new creatures" through Christ..this SHOULD affect our "vision" as well and how we look for/at a potential mate...looks are FLEETING peeps

It is interesting that you brought up about the new creatures in Christ. A woman who is a new creation in Christ will reflect this beauty inside and out. If nothing good is in the inside it doesn't matter what's on the outside.

 

[Jewel5712]

It is interesting that you brought up about the new creatures in Christ. A woman who is a new creation in Christ will reflect this beauty inside and out. If nothing good is in the inside it doesn't matter what's on the outside.

I agree but a man will ONLY see her spiritial beauty if HES looking through spiritual eyes and not human ones

 

[tourist]

I agree but a man will ONLY see her spiritial beauty if HES looking through spiritual eyes and not human ones

You raised a very good point. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder but if the beholder does not see clearly any beauty that may exist is lost. Spiritual beauty is paramount for me.

 

[calibob]

Well g'mornin everybody, I overslept it's after...7:30! that's nearly 2 hrs late 4 me. Reading your posts made me rember a phenonena that's happened to me a couple of times. While physical attraction was often the hook that had gotten me interested. During conversation a persons face or countenance appeared to somehow change before me, not always for the good mind you but has me desire to be with or get away from that person. After that happens, my perspective of them never changed back. I can't explain it but I was wondering if that has ever happened to anyone else?

 

[Jewel5712]

Do looks matter when pursuing or getting to know someone on a deeper romantic level - whether it’s online, in real life, on text, phone etc.

As a whole, male or female, do you think attraction in the opposite sex should matter?

Yes. I won't pretend they don't matter in the slightest when it comes to romantic relationships. It's reasonable and human. The first thing I notice about anyone is their appearance. It's not the only thing that matters, but it catches attention and opens the door. I would certainly hope that I'm physically attracted to my girlfriend/wife, etc. I would not be interested in them if I wasn't.

Youre cute..surprised youre single...

 

[Jewel5712]

It is interesting that you brought up about the new creatures in Christ. A woman who is a new creation in Christ will reflect this beauty inside and out. If nothing good is in the inside it doesn't matter what's on the outside.

I have YET to have a man come up to me and say "hi..just wanted to tell you..you have a very pretty spirit".. Lol..theres OTHER things men habe come up to me and said..but not that..lol

 

[tourist]

I have YET to have a man come up to me and say "hi..just wanted to tell you..you have a very pretty spirit".. Lol..theres OTHER things men habe come up to me and said..but not that..lol

Actually, that's kind of sad. That would be a pretty good compliment for a woman to receive.

 

[Jewel5712]

Actually, that's kind of sad. That would be a pretty good compliment for a woman to receive.

Yes it IS and yes it WOULD be

 

[Lynx]

I have YET to have a man come up to me and say "hi..just wanted to tell you..you have a very pretty spirit".. Lol..theres OTHER things men habe come up to me and said..but not that..lol

We guys actually notice a pretty spirit a lot... Or at least I do. But if I ever said that, it would sound like an incredibly lame pick-up line. So I never say that to a girl.

 

[Jewel5712]

We guys actually notice a pretty spirit a lot... Or at least I do. But if I ever said that, it would sound like an incredibly lame pick-up line. So I never say that to a girl.

Lol..this is how i look at it..if you HAVENT said it before n r still single you might want to TRY saying that and it MIGHT change your single status (but youd have to let her see your face first .. No avitar )

 

[Mel85]

Lol..this is how i look at it..if you HAVENT said it before n r still single you might want to TRY saying that and it MIGHT change your single status (but youd have to let her see your face first .. No avitar )

What’s with your obsession with people not showing their face in their avatar? It’s their choice remember lol.

 

[Tommy379]

Lol..this is how i look at it..if you HAVENT said it before n r still single you might want to TRY saying that and it MIGHT change your single status (but youd have to let her see your face first .. No avitar )

Some people ain't trying to change their status.

 

[Tommy379]

I ain't mentioning any names, but some people aren't interested, and work damn hard to be single.
I ain't mentioning any names, but if someone doesn't ask you out, they are not interested in you.

 

[Jewel5712]

What’s with your obsession with people not showing their face in their avatar? It’s their choice remember lol.

Yup it is...mostly teasing but if were talking pizza party etc..people have to see you right or is this another cyber masquerade?

 

[Tommy379]

Yup it is...mostly teasing but if were talking pizza party etc..people have to see you right or is this another cyber masquerade?

It's the internet. So there is that.

 

[Mel85]

Are you licking your lips? Lol

 

[Mel85]

Yup it is...mostly teasing but if were talking pizza party etc..people have to see you right or is this another cyber masquerade?

Having a pizza party doesn’t necessarily mean one has to show their face though? Who’s rule is that? Lol.

 

[Tommy379]

Are you licking your lips? Lol

I'll lick my chops for a nice piece of meat.