Does Anyone Else Feel Intimidated by the "I Only Date to Marry" Philosophy?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

Kojikun

Well-known member
Oct 5, 2018
4,658
2,721
113
#43
I honestly have given up on dating at least for now. I tried about a month ago again but still the same bad habits followed as they always do so I gave up again. I need to straighten out with my walk with the Lord before I can start again I think. Double mindedness is difficult to work with when your distracted from God.
 

LightBright

Senior Member
Mar 18, 2017
2,167
849
113
24
#44
I honestly have given up on dating at least for now. I tried about a month ago again but still the same bad habits followed as they always do so I gave up again. I need to straighten out with my walk with the Lord before I can start again I think. Double mindedness is difficult to work with when your distracted from God.
Yea fam I think that's important, we need to be ready before trying to date for sure. Men especially have a lot of things they need to have in order since we have to lead our wives so we definitely have work to do, at least i know i do.
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,889
1,958
113
Germany
#45
see why I didnt let people here get involved in my dating business lol
Only my family and closest family were involved and I dont regret it.
But I agree its pretty intimidating
 

melita916

Senior Member
Aug 12, 2011
10,464
2,692
113
#46
when I met my husband, part of me did wonder if it would be more, but honestly, my 1st thought was, "eh.. it doesn't hurt to make a new friend." but we didn't create a friendship with an agenda other than friendship. it slowly progressed to more. 7 months later, we were officially a couple.

within a month of us being an official couple, he said he was going to marry me. some may say that was too soon to say, but it didn't scare me at all. maybe because we are in our 30s, and we are too old for emotional games lol. it let me know that he was not going to waste our time. but I believe it didn't scare us because we saw how God calculated everything.

if he had said the same thing one month into our friendship, then I would have freaked out lol.

I remember some time ago, a friend asked me for christian dating advice. I honestly told him I'm not an expert on the topic. I do remember telling him, "get to know her not only because you're interested but because she is a person. she is worth getting to know because God made her."
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
10,910
6,897
113
#47
when I met my husband, part of me did wonder if it would be more, but honestly, my 1st thought was, "eh.. it doesn't hurt to make a new friend." but we didn't create a friendship with an agenda other than friendship. it slowly progressed to more. 7 months later, we were officially a couple.

within a month of us being an official couple, he said he was going to marry me. some may say that was too soon to say, but it didn't scare me at all. maybe because we are in our 30s, and we are too old for emotional games lol. it let me know that he was not going to waste our time. but I believe it didn't scare us because we saw how God calculated everything.

if he had said the same thing one month into our friendship, then I would have freaked out lol.

I remember some time ago, a friend asked me for christian dating advice. I honestly told him I'm not an expert on the topic. I do remember telling him, "get to know her not only because you're interested but because she is a person. she is worth getting to know because God made her."
You two are cute :)
 

p_rehbein

Senior Member
Sep 4, 2013
30,704
6,892
113
#48
No, I'm not. I enjoy being the shining example of who NOT to marry........
 

LightBright

Senior Member
Mar 18, 2017
2,167
849
113
24
#51
Why not just go on dates for fun?
Well we try not to date for fun because, in this case, it could lead people on and in many cases defy biblical principles. We date for a purpose, not just any purpose, but usually to get married and that brings up the thread topic. I don't go on dates with tons of girls for fun, I'd be called a "player" or, my personal favorite, a THOTTTTTT. If a girl were to do this she would probably be called a gold digger or something similar to that. Ultimately it comes down to what Jesus tells us His will is, and in a single persons case, we should date with some kind of purpose leading to marriage somehow. Some people take that really far, others take it very loosely and rapid date or something and I'm not going to judge either side, as long as you have a goal that eventually leads to marriage I think you're moving in the right direction.
 

LightBright

Senior Member
Mar 18, 2017
2,167
849
113
24
#53
Reminds me of this guy he told his wife, a love interest at the time, that guys had her on the exchange program cuz she dated a lot of different people. I don't really like the idea tbh but it's just a different way to do things ig. I'd say something definite like " ill never date a girl that is flipping guys" or something smart like that but I've said stuff like that in the past and i ended up caving because I really liked the girl lol. So unless it's a deal breaker I'll just say what i prefer because I think God likes bringing people in my life i can't stand normally, but I end up caring about them anyway i guess love covers a multitude of other stuff too.I need to start a weeb thread now hmmm
 

LightBright

Senior Member
Mar 18, 2017
2,167
849
113
24
#56
Why does a date have to be so serious? lol
I mean I think you have a point, I think that's why I don't really date. Regardless we try to do everything with a purpose, but maybe we should just be more casual and see how things go. That could help solve certain issues idk...