I don't want to be a doormat.

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Mii

Well-known member
Mar 23, 2019
2,058
1,320
113
#21
This kind of stuff makes me angry...if you didn't live 600 miles away I would cut your yard FOR FREE (Minus some water and conversation). Have the equipment and there are ministries like this in my area.

Have you asked at your local church? My grandmother is in rural Georgia and usually has some help. you do need to ask though. Sorry that this happened to you <3
 

Waggles

Senior Member
Sep 21, 2017
3,338
1,261
113
South
adelaiderevival.com
#22
The challenges of being a real Christian in a non-Christian world.
I read that you have got plenty of worldly advice on how to deal with this in the flesh and in your own strength.
WWJD ??

38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’
39 But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.
40 And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well.
41 And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles.
42 Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.
Matthew 5:
27 “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.
29 To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either.
30 Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back.
Luke 6:
Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Matthew 5:
15 But let none of you suffer as a murderer or a thief or an evildoer or as a meddler.
16 Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in that name.
1Peter 4:

Pray about your loss and have a good cry with the Lord about this. But leave the issue with God and let him bless you.
 
L

Locoponydirtman

Guest
#23
you allowed yourself to be 'duped' - don't know how old you are, but after a few years, we must begin to 'ask' questions',
especially to those who 'just come up onto our door-step'!!

in each and every situation that comes up in our lives, 'we should take it to God FIRST', no matter how simple we think it is'...
How sweet and loving, kind and gentle of you as a Christian to chastise a lady who is in desperate need, and in hope gave made a deal with someone who didn't follow through, leaving her in greater need. I'm sure somewhere in the scripture Jesus told us to chastise those in need, but I haven't found it.
the WHOLE POINT IS, -
that we do not want to be manipulated or mocked or taken advantage of in any way,
while we are MINISTRING to others...
we are to be in CONTROL through CHRIST...
if we 'allow' ourselves to be 'defrauded, it has to be according to God's Will,
and NOT according to our being 'fooled'... this is Scripture":...
No it's not, post the scripture that says that we are to be in control and not be defauded by scoundrels.

Mam, I live in Texas but want to help you. Please find out how much someone would charge to get your lawn cut. If nothing else maybe we can put together some funds to get it cut at least one time.
 
L

Locoponydirtman

Guest
#24
The challenges of being a real Christian in a non-Christian world.
I read that you have got plenty of worldly advice on how to deal with this in the flesh and in your own strength.
WWJD ??

38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’
39 But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.
40 And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well.
41 And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles.
42 Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.
Matthew 5:
27 “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.
29 To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic either.
30 Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back.
Luke 6:
Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Matthew 5:
15 But let none of you suffer as a murderer or a thief or an evildoer or as a meddler.
16 Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in that name.
1Peter 4:

Pray about your loss and have a good cry with the Lord about this. But leave the issue with God and let him bless you.
This is the truth.
 
Aug 3, 2019
74
82
18
#25
I am a widow, living alone, with low income, and disabilities. Lawn care is a major problem for me, too hard to do, and can't afford to pay what people want. Last season we bought a push mower and a small rider. I have a very sandy lot, so walking it is impossible for me, and the rider has small front tires that dig in and get stuck. In early June a young man came to my door, his 2 little girls in the car. He asked about the riding mower sitting beside my shed. I told him about it and that I am hoping to sell it for the $200. I paid for it, to put toward one with larger front tires. He said he lives the next street over, likes to tinker on small engines, and loves to help people out. He asked if I would consider giving him the rider, and he would use his own larger tractor to provide my lawn care, weekly, for the rest of the season. I told him I would think about it and asked him to come back the next day for my answer. I decided it would be worth it to have the yard cared for all season, so I wrote up a contract between us. He arrived promptly the next morning and agreed to the contract. He came back about 2 hours later with a friend in tow, and they were busy blowing the leaves out of the garden area, and weed wacking. I had to leave for an appointment, and when I returned, they were gone, nothing more done, and the rider was gone. It's been 7 weeks, and he has not returned. My lawn is knee high, and mowing season will be done in another month or so. Obviously he only wanted the rider, and did not intend to keep his commitment. I am disappointed, hurt, a little angry, and my trust of others is damaged. I don't want to be a doormat and just let him, or anyone else, walk all over me. I have tried many times to call him, no one answers, and the message service is not set up. I have gone by the house a number of times, usually no one is home, sometimes just the kids are there, and most recently the yard was full of cars and people, and they had a bonfire and cookout going. My rider is not in sight, probably sold. I am seriously considering contacting the police, and/or taking him to small claims court. I am a Christian and I love to help out others when I can. I was hoping this arrangement would become friendly and I could possibly be a witness to him, and a help to his family. I would appreciate any advice from you all. Thank you.


I thank you all for your input, lots of good advice and things to think and pray about. I have also received advice from my pastor and a number of local friends. I have decided to take him to small claims court. The contract has his full name, address, phone, signature and date. The day I picked up the paperwork, I mentioned it in my FB post. Two days later he showed up at dusk, spent 12-15 min. mowing half of my front yard, then took off, never a word from him. We suspect he had been ghosting me on FB, and thought he could get out of trouble that way. Wrong answer. He will be served papers sometime between 8/30 and 9/11, and we have court on 9/18. I have no worries about winning or loosing, he is obviously in the wrong, and I have plenty of proof. I am asking for the value of the mower, plus court expenses. I am not giving him credit for that one time 1/4 job, I do not want him around anymore, and I do not want the mower back. Unfortunately, I know he does not have any income, except his wife's, and cash or trades for odd jobs. So he won't be able to pay, and they won't be able to garnish his wages. So I probably won't see anything out of it. I just want to make sure he knows I'm NOT an easy target, or a doormat, and hopefully it will make him think twice before he tries to do this to someone else.
 

Mii

Well-known member
Mar 23, 2019
2,058
1,320
113
#26
Mam, I live in Texas but want to help you. Please find out how much someone would charge to get your lawn cut. If nothing else maybe we can put together some funds to get it cut at least one time.
I'm open to that.
 

SoulWeaver

Senior Member
Oct 25, 2014
4,889
2,534
113
#27
As loving as we should be... We should not allow people to take advantage of the saints. Epistles are speaking up against such things (like freeloaders, leeching etc). Jesus said also be innocent like the doves but wise like serpents... This is (at least for me) probably the hardest part of being a Christian, drawing those lines.
Praying for your complete peace over the situation.
 
G

Godsgirl83

Guest
#28
I thank you all for your input, lots of good advice and things to think and pray about. I have also received advice from my pastor and a number of local friends. I have decided to take him to small claims court. The contract has his full name, address, phone, signature and date. The day I picked up the paperwork, I mentioned it in my FB post. Two days later he showed up at dusk, spent 12-15 min. mowing half of my front yard, then took off, never a word from him. We suspect he had been ghosting me on FB, and thought he could get out of trouble that way. Wrong answer. He will be served papers sometime between 8/30 and 9/11, and we have court on 9/18. I have no worries about winning or loosing, he is obviously in the wrong, and I have plenty of proof. I am asking for the value of the mower, plus court expenses. I am not giving him credit for that one time 1/4 job, I do not want him around anymore, and I do not want the mower back. Unfortunately, I know he does not have any income, except his wife's, and cash or trades for odd jobs. So he won't be able to pay, and they won't be able to garnish his wages. So I probably won't see anything out of it. I just want to make sure he knows I'm NOT an easy target, or a doormat, and hopefully it will make him think twice before he tries to do this to someone else.
looks like you haven't been on in a few weeks, but if you do come back on here, please let us know how things went. Been praying for you about this.
 
Aug 3, 2019
74
82
18
#29
Update......The Police said there is nothing they can do, but to take him to small claims court, which I did. He did not show up, so he lost of course. He had 30 days to pay, which he did not do, of course. So now I have to file more paperwork, eventually the court will confiscate a belonging of his that is of equal value to what he owes me. They will then sell it, and give me the money.
 
7

7seasrekeyed

Guest
#30
Update......The Police said there is nothing they can do, but to take him to small claims court, which I did. He did not show up, so he lost of course. He had 30 days to pay, which he did not do, of course. So now I have to file more paperwork, eventually the court will confiscate a belonging of his that is of equal value to what he owes me. They will then sell it, and give me the money.

well really no surprise there...sorry though

you should block him on facebook and maybe make your page private if you don't want everyone to know your business

do you know how to do that?

if you want to do that and don't know how, I can point you to the way to do that :)
 

CharliRenee

Member
Staff member
Nov 4, 2014
6,687
7,164
113
#31
Update......The Police said there is nothing they can do, but to take him to small claims court, which I did. He did not show up, so he lost of course. He had 30 days to pay, which he did not do, of course. So now I have to file more paperwork, eventually the court will confiscate a belonging of his that is of equal value to what he owes me. They will then sell it, and give me the money.
Well I am sorry that you had to deal with all this, but I am glad you will get whatever they are able to get.

Rose, it is really good to see you. I have missed you around here.
 
M

morefaithrequired

Guest
#32
one way of looking at this is that at least you werent duped for thousands of dollars.
i dont think you were a doormat at all. these things happen now and then. if you belong to a Church someone trustworthy might help perhaps.
But it is tough on your own. i would struggle too.