The care and feeding of the heart 101
Be careful where you leave it. When you are lonely it is tempting to put it on the free table in your apartment lobby (Just run with the image for a moment) to see if anyone will pick it up. You need to value it more than that.
Don't hand it off to anyone who looks at it sideways. We spend more time investigating restaurant reviews that potential dates.
Ask questions and really listen to the answers. Sometimes we really want something to work and we ignore what others are telling us and even what they are saying. I had a friend who really liked this guy at her church. He told her he was never marrying again. She ignored that thinking she could change his mind. After several months she ended up sad and rather single.
Don't jump ahead. There are a lot of jokes about women having full relationships with guys before they make it across the room to talk to them. The fellow says hi and the woman has already planned their summer schedule. Yes it is just humour but it is easy to analyze something to death before it starts.
Spend some time together and see them as a person. So many people get it backwards. They try and decide if there is a future before they know them. Do not hand your heart to someone you do not really know. If you do jump to "I love you" too quickly, it tells them is that you don't really care who they are, you are just looking for someone to fill a role, a void in your life.
That one goes both ways. If a fellow buys you a ring before you have even said you love them, that is a warning flag.
Don't give your heart away too soon and don't let them declare intentions if you don't believe that they see you.
Be wise. That one is hard when you are lonely and you just want to believe that he is the right one. Love yourself enough to be wise.
It is easy for people to say the right things, so take your time. You are worth it.
