Marriage and the home

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Godsgirl83

Guest
#1
oh how I wish more people understood this.......
it makes me cringe when questions about marriage arise and the very first answer people give is "just leave them"
Billy Graham explains marriage well here.
 
Jul 20, 2019
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#2
https://www.crosswalk.com/family/ma...hristian-marriage-three-common-questions.html growing up I experienced an appalling marriage with my parents, mother has been married three times. They did divorce when I was a teenager, but in between it was awful. Unfortunalty mankind makes bad decisions, and those decisions need to be broken . The only other alternative is to stay with the dire consequences that entails. Also when we do discover the one, I think we should grasp it, love is love, is love.
 
Sep 13, 2018
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#3
https://www.crosswalk.com/family/ma...hristian-marriage-three-common-questions.html growing up I experienced an appalling marriage with my parents, mother has been married three times. They did divorce when I was a teenager, but in between it was awful. Unfortunalty mankind makes bad decisions, and those decisions need to be broken . The only other alternative is to stay with the dire consequences that entails. Also when we do discover the one, I think we should grasp it, love is love, is love.
You must be Irish...LOL
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
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#5
If someone is actually going to leave a marriage they need a safe place to go first, I think ppl dont realise this and think its easy. Its not.

Womens refuges have to operate undercover because its highly likely that partners will find them, want them back and then put them and their children in mortal danger.

That is the risk when you become one flesh with someone. Its not so easy to separate. so before anyone marries, make sure both of you know its Gods will.
 

chanchuinchoy

Senior Member
Nov 26, 2015
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Sungei Buloh, Selangor, Malaysia
#6
If someone is actually going to leave a marriage they need a safe place to go first, I think ppl dont realise this and think its easy. Its not.

Womens refuges have to operate undercover because its highly likely that partners will find them, want them back and then put them and their children in mortal danger.

That is the risk when you become one flesh with someone. Its not so easy to separate. so before anyone marries, make sure both of you know its Gods will.
Why would you leave a marriage? Isn't it that divorce is forbidden if you are a Christian?
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
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#7
Why would you leave a marriage? Isn't it that divorce is forbidden if you are a Christian?
Separation is not divorce. Handled properly, it is a carefully-managed effort to preserve a marriage, not end one. Someone who is being abused is wise to separate from their partner, because the partner needs help and isn't getting it while together.

As to divorce being forbidden if you're a Christian, it isn't. It is strongly discouraged though, and the parameters for it are very narrow. Depending on the laws in your jurisdiction, divorce may be forced upon you, not chosen.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
25,484
13,785
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#8
If someone is actually going to leave a marriage they need a safe place to go first, I think ppl dont realise this and think its easy. Its not.

Womens refuges have to operate undercover because its highly likely that partners will find them, want them back and then put them and their children in mortal danger.
You make a good point about leaving a dangerous situation. Men who are in destructive relationships also need somewhere safe to go. Most people don't consider this possibility. The person who founded the women's shelter movement in Britain also advocated for men's shelters, and she was viciously attacked by feminists and hounded out of the movement she started. Many countries have zero funding for men's shelters while spending millions on women's shelters.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
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#9
I dont know, most of the divorcees I know that are christian left because of abuse or the other person was unfaithful, or it might have been both. Some people marry but they dont marry another believer.

the bible actually says if you are already married dont leave, but you can let the other person leave if they dont want to be married to you anymore as we are not called to be in bondage.

The problem seems to be for women, an abusive husband actually wont leave. So they need to be the ones that leave with nothing but the clothes on their backs. For their own safety. Often the women take their children with them and have to sneak out otherwise the husband will come after them and threaten to kill them. Not kidding about that.
 

Prycejosh1987

Well-known member
Jul 19, 2020
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#10
oh how I wish more people understood this.......
it makes me cringe when questions about marriage arise and the very first answer people give is "just leave them"
How much easier wouldnt it be to go to the pastor, and receive marriage counselling.