Why do you think God has you single?
- Thread starter ArtsieSteph
- Start date
-
Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.
If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!
To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
*Lynx prowls through the forum underbrush armed with a flamethrower, silently tracking CozHElivesIcanface2morrow the matchmaker.
-
3
- Show all
I think more often than not we get in the way of Godās plan.
Perhaps we werenāt open to who had for us.
Perhaps we have our focus elsewhere.
Perhaps we let fear get in the way of taking that next step.
I think itās a great question āwhy does God have you single?ā, but for me at least, Iām thinking Iām single because of me, not God.
Perhaps we werenāt open to who had for us.
Perhaps we have our focus elsewhere.
Perhaps we let fear get in the way of taking that next step.
I think itās a great question āwhy does God have you single?ā, but for me at least, Iām thinking Iām single because of me, not God.
-
3
- Show all
for me I think why I didnt stick with anyone I dated me was because of age difference and also logistics I mean in my twenties the men I met lived or had families in completely different countries and I wanted to stay home, being married and living in a different country was not even appealing to me. I had my own life I had to sort out first plus healing from emotional abuse etc.
it was weird too that in my twenties, men who were like 10 or more years older would be interested in me and that was off putting because thats a huge difference in age at the time. I had too much energy for them to cope with.
Then in my 30s when i came to the Lord and got healed and sorted my life out I thought hmm maybe its time but no God was like Ive got something better for you. And all the people that came my way who I started being friends with, christians, female friends many had come out of really unhappy marriages and partnerships. Just dealing with the fall out from THAT was exhausting...when you are single you end up being somtimes like a substitute husband for someone elses failed marriage. or a confidante girlfriend, nanny, counselor, agony aunt etc.
it was weird too that in my twenties, men who were like 10 or more years older would be interested in me and that was off putting because thats a huge difference in age at the time. I had too much energy for them to cope with.
Then in my 30s when i came to the Lord and got healed and sorted my life out I thought hmm maybe its time but no God was like Ive got something better for you. And all the people that came my way who I started being friends with, christians, female friends many had come out of really unhappy marriages and partnerships. Just dealing with the fall out from THAT was exhausting...when you are single you end up being somtimes like a substitute husband for someone elses failed marriage. or a confidante girlfriend, nanny, counselor, agony aunt etc.
-
1
-
1
-
1
- Show all
This thread keeps reminding me of a certain manager at w*rk. She has been married three times. She is currently divorced, but almost every time I see her she is complaining about her current boyfriend or complaining because she is currently alone and can't find a boyfriend.
She also keeps nagging me because I'm happily single. I can't tell if she thinks I'm miserable and lying about being happy - maybe she just can't wrap her mind around the concept of being happy without a spouse - or if she wants me to be as miserable as she is because misery loves company. All I know for sure is I'm single and content, and she's always looking for a guy and she's miserable.
I keep trying to tell her she's never going to find true happiness just by finding a man. No man is good enough to make a woman happy just by being there to be her man. She needs to figure out how to be happy first, and THEN she will be in a better shape to find a man. But she won't listen because she's convinced all she has to do is find the right man and her life will be all sunshine and rainbows and daisies. All the other men were the wrong kind of men, but if only she can find the right one...
*sigh
"Why do you think God has you single?"
I don't know, but I sure am grateful for it. Some of the women I know make me downright exuberant about being single.
She also keeps nagging me because I'm happily single. I can't tell if she thinks I'm miserable and lying about being happy - maybe she just can't wrap her mind around the concept of being happy without a spouse - or if she wants me to be as miserable as she is because misery loves company. All I know for sure is I'm single and content, and she's always looking for a guy and she's miserable.
I keep trying to tell her she's never going to find true happiness just by finding a man. No man is good enough to make a woman happy just by being there to be her man. She needs to figure out how to be happy first, and THEN she will be in a better shape to find a man. But she won't listen because she's convinced all she has to do is find the right man and her life will be all sunshine and rainbows and daisies. All the other men were the wrong kind of men, but if only she can find the right one...
*sigh
"Why do you think God has you single?"
I don't know, but I sure am grateful for it. Some of the women I know make me downright exuberant about being single.
-
2
-
1
- Show all
The lady... er, woman in question is also always hyper-critical of everything. When I gave people a loaf of sourdough bread at Christmas I didn't dare give her one, because I hated to think what fault she might find with it. Even if she found the perfect man, she would find a flaw in him somewhere, or something she could claim was a flaw.
This is another problem with expecting a spouse to make your life perfect. When it doesn't happen, you start blaming the spouse, because your life is not perfect like you thought it would be, so it must be because your spouse is lacking in some way.
Man I just LOVE being single!
This is another problem with expecting a spouse to make your life perfect. When it doesn't happen, you start blaming the spouse, because your life is not perfect like you thought it would be, so it must be because your spouse is lacking in some way.
Man I just LOVE being single!
-
1
- Show all
I would hate for this kind of pressure to be put on me. Marriage is not a cure for deep-seated dissatisfaction with life. I don't get why people put this kind of burden on their partners.
That might be why the same people who burden their partners this way think that single people cannot be happy (because marriage, in their mind, is the cure-all and single people are not married).
That might be why the same people who burden their partners this way think that single people cannot be happy (because marriage, in their mind, is the cure-all and single people are not married).
-
1
-
1
- Show all
Hello ArtsieSteph!
Regarding marriage, Jesus said the following:
========================================
"Why then,ā they asked, ādid Moses allow a man to give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away? ā
Jesus replied, āMoses permitted you to divorce your wives because of your hardness of heart; but it was not this way from the beginning. Now I tell you that whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman, commits adultery. ā
His disciples said to Him, āIf this is the case between a man and his wife, it is better not to marry.ā
āNot everyone can accept this word,ā He replied, ābut only those to whom it has been given. For there are eunuchs who were born that way; others were made that way by men; and still others live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.ā
=======================================
In addition to the question of marriage, Paul said the following:
"Are you committed to a wife? Do not seek to be released. Are you free of commitment? Do not look for a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned. And if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.
Therefore, everyone has their perfect gift from God, to married or to remain single and celibate. There are those who were meant to marry and some to be unmarried to be free from the troubles that arise from being married and the cares of this world.
Regarding marriage, Jesus said the following:
========================================
"Why then,ā they asked, ādid Moses allow a man to give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away? ā
Jesus replied, āMoses permitted you to divorce your wives because of your hardness of heart; but it was not this way from the beginning. Now I tell you that whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman, commits adultery. ā
His disciples said to Him, āIf this is the case between a man and his wife, it is better not to marry.ā
āNot everyone can accept this word,ā He replied, ābut only those to whom it has been given. For there are eunuchs who were born that way; others were made that way by men; and still others live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.ā
=======================================
In addition to the question of marriage, Paul said the following:
"Are you committed to a wife? Do not seek to be released. Are you free of commitment? Do not look for a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned. And if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.
Therefore, everyone has their perfect gift from God, to married or to remain single and celibate. There are those who were meant to marry and some to be unmarried to be free from the troubles that arise from being married and the cares of this world.
People should not make God responsible for their marital status. Those who are single have chosen to remain single. Those who wish to be married make the necessary efforts to do so.
Did you know that God wants ALL to be married, raise children, and have a family? That was His decree at the time of creation.
Did you know that God wants ALL to be married, raise children, and have a family? That was His decree at the time of creation.
Here we go again...
"Baby if you turn me down, that's against God's will!"
Not to mention all those people who can't have children... tsk tsk, whatever will they do? So terribly out of God's will and nothing they can do about it.
Oh and what about the current overpopulation problem? Hmm, that's God's will that we overrun the planet and decimate it?
Hmm... maybe that was just what God told specific people at specific times? You know, kinda like God told them to march around Jericho, but that doesn't mean we are supposed to march around any cities today.
"Baby if you turn me down, that's against God's will!"
Not to mention all those people who can't have children... tsk tsk, whatever will they do? So terribly out of God's will and nothing they can do about it.
Oh and what about the current overpopulation problem? Hmm, that's God's will that we overrun the planet and decimate it?
Hmm... maybe that was just what God told specific people at specific times? You know, kinda like God told them to march around Jericho, but that doesn't mean we are supposed to march around any cities today.
S
Here we go again...
"Baby if you turn me down, that's against God's will!"
Not to mention all those people who can't have children... tsk tsk, whatever will they do? So terribly out of God's will and nothing they can do about it.
Oh and what about the current overpopulation problem? Hmm, that's God's will that we overrun the planet and decimate it?
Hmm... maybe that was just what God told specific people at specific times? You know, kinda like God told them to march around Jericho, but that doesn't mean we are supposed to march around any cities today.
"Baby if you turn me down, that's against God's will!"
Not to mention all those people who can't have children... tsk tsk, whatever will they do? So terribly out of God's will and nothing they can do about it.
Oh and what about the current overpopulation problem? Hmm, that's God's will that we overrun the planet and decimate it?
Hmm... maybe that was just what God told specific people at specific times? You know, kinda like God told them to march around Jericho, but that doesn't mean we are supposed to march around any cities today.
But I agree with you.